The process of a girl falling in love with a boy is actually a complex and subtle process of psychological change. For a girl to really fall in love with you, a guy needs to go through the following four stages. Today, I will analyze these four stages one by one to help boys better understand the psychology of girls, so as to easily win the hearts of girls.
The first stage is "closing the eyes", which is also the first condition for the emergence of love. The so-called "eye match" refers to something in you that seems to have the value she is pursuing. The "seemingly" here is important because it means that these traits in you are only her preference, not something you deliberately do. These traits can be your appearance, figure, temperament and other external hardware, or your behavioral clues, such as humor in language, calm attitude, etc. These will become the criteria for judging her favorability of you.
When a girl has a crush on you, she will move on to the second stage, which is the "consistency test". At this stage, she will throw out some tests, consciously or unconsciously, to try to ** whether you have the consistency of the values she is after. For example, she may be curious about your life, career, experiences, etc., to see if you meet her expectations. When faced with these problems, you need to stay calm and show your ** value. If you are able to pass these tests, then she will develop a deeper affection for you.
However, it's not enough to just pass the consistency test, you also need to put the girl through the third stage, which is "emotional dependence". At this stage, the girl will start to really like you, appreciate you, and even become dependent on you. She will pay attention to your every little gesture and infinitely magnify the importance of those actions in her mind. This exaggeration and amplification are fueled by the irrepressible affection in her heart. At this stage, the emotional goodwill of both parties will reach its peak, thus entering the period of passionate love.
It is important to note that emotions are just an internal feeling, and it is always fluctuating. Therefore, even if the girl is attracted to you at this time, after a long time, she may forget and remember how she feels at this time. Therefore, you need to consolidate the relationship between you through continuous interaction and communication, so that the girl's affection for you continues to rise.
In general, for a girl to really fall in love with you, you need to go through the stages of eye fit, consistency test, emotional dependence, etc. At each stage, you need to constantly increase your value and attractiveness, while remaining sincere and patient. Only in this way can you win the hearts of girls and move towards a happy future together.
I believe that many boys have experienced such a situation: at first, they get along well with the girl, but as time goes by, the woman gradually becomes cold. The reason behind this is often related to "relationship investment" in relationship development. A stable relationship usually goes through four stages: relationship investment. Only when you have really paid for this relationship will you really care. Imagine that if you see a beautiful woman on the street, do you immediately care about her? The answer is no. The beauty you see on your phone, will you fall in love with her directly? Nor will it be. Because in both cases, you didn't pay for them, so your feelings are nothing more than good feelings.
In fact, love arises through a process of self-reverse rationalization after mutual attraction and investment in each other. For the girl you like, you will want to talk to her every day, and you will be willing to pay for her, even give her the best things. You may ask yourself, why would you be so nice to her? At this point, you will give yourself a reasonable explanation, which is "I love her". Of course, in this process, you also need to guide the other party to pay and invest in you, and also reverse rationalization.
In the previous stages, you only need to show the qualities that the other person appreciates to generate affection. But at this stage, you will expect the other person to solve some substantive problems for you, such as making up for her boring moments, solving minor troubles in life, and removing her insecurities about your future relationship. At this stage, both parties invest together and manage a good relationship together, and such feelings will gradually arise.
Finally, I would like to say that there is a very common phenomenon in today's society: many people skip the second stage and enter the third stage after seeing that the other person seems to be a good match in the first stage. However, such an approach often leads to a significant deviation in the consistency of both parties. Feelings break down when the novelty wears off and both parties are unable to stir up mood swings. We all know that fast-food love is not healthy. If you want to have a healthy, real relationship, don't think about someone "it's okay to try". Don't rush to be together just because of your appearance, but you should spend more time getting to know each other, such as chatting, eating together, watching movies, sharing each other's lives, etc. In this way, you can really get to know each other and build a solid emotional foundation.
In short, love needs to take its time. A true liking must be a deliberate decision, not a spur of the moment. I hope that everyone can contact and understand each other on a monthly or even yearly basis, and then choose to be together after going through these three stages. This will make the relationship more stable and long-lasting. At the same time, it is also necessary to remember the principle of preferring lack to abundance, and not to start a relationship at random because of a moment of loneliness. The last thing I want to say is that instead of giving 100% to the person who doesn't deserve it, it is better to love yourself well, improve yourself, and make yourself a better person. This way, you'll be better able to attract people who match you to spend quality time with.