1. "It is better to turn your back on the family than to never have this mother. " "She eloped with someone else's father, and as a man, I also have dignity. " "How good can she become?
Will stepmom have good people? "In front of the camera, Niu Qingying's ex-husband, son and stepchildren are full of resentment and anger, and it seems that endless dissatisfaction has accumulated in their hearts.
In March 2020, Niu Qingying, a 75-year-old man living in Huai'an, Jiangsu Province, suddenly suffered a cerebral infarction and was bedridden and unable to take care of himself.
Niu Qingying, a mother of six children who has been married twice, was shunned by her five children when it came to her maintenance issues. Her own daughter has died, and the remaining five children have expressed their unwillingness to care for her.
In a desperate situation, her ex-husband Qi Guohua decided to fight a "maintenance lawsuit" for her. The lawsuit has sparked a controversy over the duties of mothers and the righteousness of their children in return.
In Huai'an, Jiangsu this year, Qi Guohua met Niu Qingying again, but she was delirious because of cerebral infarction and couldn't remember anyone or anything.
Qi Guohua and Niu Qingying's marriage is the order of their parents, the words of the matchmaker, and they have been agreed to be a baby since childhood. The two families are world friends, and they have a close relationship, just across the river, and they can immediately hear the response when they talk on that side.
However, poor couples mourn everything, and couples who lack an emotional foundation are even more difficult in their daily lives. According to their eldest son, Qi Liyang, their three views did not coincide, their personalities were opposite, communication was difficult, and they often quarreled.
The marriage between Qi Liyang and Niu Qingying was full of contradictions and dissatisfaction. Qi Liyang thought that Niu Qingying had no sense of responsibility and ability, while Niu Qingying complained that Qi Liyang was lazy and irresponsible.
Although they had a child, the relationship did not improve because of the arrival of the child, but became more strained. The children also expressed dissatisfaction with Niu Qingying's role as a mother, believing that she was not competent enough and often let the children cook for themselves.
The couple's quarrels and conflicts grew more and more, eventually causing them to no longer be able to live together.
Qi Guohua saved his marriage with his wife Niu Qingying, came to the city with his bags, and after working hard to make money, he sent all his income home, hoping that she could stay at home and take care of the children.
However, Niu Qingying's heart has long been scattered elsewhere, only caring about his own enjoyment and not caring about anything at home. People in the village began to gossip, saying that Niu Qingying had been outside for a year, and she didn't even care about her husband and children, which was really cruel.
There are also people who sympathize, saying that their family often quarrels, does not look like a husband and wife, and is expected to divorce sooner or later. This made Qi Guohua feel very aggrieved, and he could only bear this pain silently.
Niu Qingying and her husband Qi Guohua divorced by agreement, her daughter Niu Ailing was raised by Niu Qingying, and her sons Qi Liyang and Qi Lishan lived with Qi Guohua. In terms of property division, Niu Qingying got most of the family's property, plus 700 yuan in cash, while Qi Guohua continued to live a difficult life with his two sons and the remaining property.
It is said that Niu Qingying's brother-in-law also came to Qi's house and told them: "Your mother has left, and her life will no longer be related to you in the future." ”
When the eldest brother Qi Liyang and the younger brother Qi Lishan were 15 and 11 years old, the divorce of their parents made them deeply feel pain and hatred. They couldn't understand why their mother was so cruel to leave and cut off all contact.
At the same time, although her daughter Niu Ailing nominally follows her mother, she actually lives with her grandmother and occasionally spends time at her father's house. Niu Qingying's behavior is really shocking, she has abandoned her husband and children to the extreme.
In January 1986, she married Liu Fengquan, a resident of the same town, in the festive atmosphere of the Spring Festival. What is embarrassing is that Liu Fengquan's son and Qi Liyang are classmates.
This made Niu Qingying's absurd behavior more eye-catching, and also made Qi Liyang, who lacked care since childhood, even more inferior and cowardly, and he couldn't even raise his head in front of outsiders.
Qi Liyang's brothers had to drop out of school to work because of their father Qi Liyang's property problems, and broke off relations with their mother Niu Qingying. Although they hated their mother, their father Qi Guohua taught them that although they could hate Niu Qingying's injustice, they couldn't learn from her, their mother was the mother who gave birth to them after all.
Qi Guohua kept in mind his father's teachings, and asked his two sons to let go of the pain of the past, forget their hatred, face the future bravely, and live their lives in a down-to-earth manner. At the same time, Niu Qingying thought that he had escaped from the sea of suffering and lived a happy life.
However, this is not the case, she just jumped from one abyss to another, this abyss is deeper and more terrifying, and almost cost her her life. The second marriage life was full of failures, she was beaten to the point that her nose and face were swollen, and she often went back to her parents' house to heal, these things caused an uproar in the village, and people hated her and took it for granted that she was beaten.
Qi Guohua works outside all the year round and rarely has the opportunity to return to his hometown. However, he learned through inquiry that Niu Qingying's life was not good, and she was often beaten and scolded by her second-married husband.
After the second marriage, Niu Qingying's temper became more hot, she was still lazy, and there was also a dislike between her and her mother-in-law. At first, her new husband Liu Fengquan was able to tolerate her behavior, but after a long time, her family was unwilling to accommodate her temper anymore, and she was not treated as well as before.
More than ten years later, Qi Guohua learned the news of Niu Qingying's divorce from his daughter. It turned out that Niu Qingying had never been treated well by her husband's family, and later she had some physical problems and was even more disliked.
After the stepchildren grew up, they constantly encouraged their father to divorce Niu Qingying. Liu Fengquan is also tired of his wife, and his desire to divorce is very strong. In order to divorce smoothly, they decided to separate, and Liu Fengquan moved out to live for two years, leaving Niu Qingying alone to live in a thatched house the size of a kitchen.
In August 2000, Liu Fengquan formally filed a divorce lawsuit with the court. After mediation, Liu Fengquan agreed to pay Niu Qingying a one-time payment of 7,000 yuan, and the marriage between the two was dissolved.
After the divorce, Niu Qingying moved in with her mother. At that time, she was in good health and able to take care of herself, helping her mother cook and wash every day, and occasionally planting some fruits and vegetables.
After her mother passed away, Niu Qingying moved to her daughter Niu Ailing's house, but as she grew older, Niu Qingying's physical condition deteriorated day by day, and she was almost unable to take care of herself and could only rely on her daughter to take care of her.
However, unfortunately, her daughter Niu Ailing died suddenly, which made Niu Qingying's life difficult. First, it is very inconvenient for a son-in-law to live with his mother-in-law; Second, the son-in-law is not obliged to continue to take care of Niu Qingying.
In the end, Niu Qingying returned to her mother's old house and began to live alone, and she could get a subsidy of 120 yuan per month. In October 2012, Niu Qingying took her two stepchildren to court, accusing them of failing to fulfill their maintenance obligations.
After mediation by the court, Liu Hongfeng and Liu Hairong, brother and sister, agreed to pay Niu Qingying 970 yuan per year in alimony expenses.
Niu Qingying, an elderly man who is seriously ill, could only rely on meager child support and the care of neighbors. The alimony of $200 is just a drop in the bucket for her illness**.
In March 2020, she suddenly had a cerebral infarction, but fortunately, her neighbor was sent to the hospital in time to save her life. But the illness did not let her go easily, leaving many sequelae that require long-term ** and care.
That grandson didn't do things right, he read for nothing, he raised me, and he didn't take care of me. Seeing his ex-wife's miserable situation, Qi Guohua felt pity, so he took her home and took care of her daily life.
Although I also have some resentment, how can I not be resentful? But she had been the mother of my child after all, and I couldn't watch her suffer. Qi Guohua said helplessly.
Qi Guohua is taking care of Niu Qingying, who is seriously ill, and is facing huge financial pressure. Although he was willing to bear the usual expenses, he could not afford the high cost of the medicine.
In desperation, he made a bold decision: to sue Niu Qingying's biological son and stepson in court, requiring them to fulfill their maintenance obligations. According to the law, all five children should take responsibility for Niu Qingying's support, but none of them are willing to take responsibility.
This made Qi Guohua feel a deep headache. In the end, the Huai'an District People's Court of Jiangsu Province conducted a public trial of the case, and the plaintiff demanded that the five children pay a total of 2,880 yuan per month in alimony.
Although this decision put Qi Guohua under great pressure, he believes that it is to protect Niu Qingying's rights and interests. He hopes that through legal means, children will be aware of their responsibilities and obligations, and he also hopes that this can be used as a warning to make more people pay attention to the care and respect for the elderly.
During Qi Guohua's trial, several defendants expressed their unwillingness to support their mothers. They believe that this is because their mother, Niu Qingying, has failed to fulfill her duties as a mother, so they do not want to fulfill their obligations as children.
In addition, Qi Liyang added that due to his parents' divorce, he was forced to drop out of school and became a child laborer. Due to his lack of education, he could only do odd jobs on construction sites, and his life was difficult and embarrassing.
As for the youngest son, Qi Lishan, his personality has become distorted because he witnessed his parents' divorce when he was a child. Coupled with the poor economic conditions, he has not yet married.
Qi Liyang and Niu Qingying's selfishness, greed for pleasure and impulsive departure have made their children bear the shadow of childhood all the time, and their lives are becoming increasingly difficult. "She once swore that birth, old age, sickness and death have nothing to do with us.
Besides, her household registration is still with her second husband, and it has nothing to do with us. Qi Liyang said categorically. On the other hand, stepchild Liu Hairong stepped forward to explain. "When my father and Niu Qingying got married, my eldest brother was already 17 years old and started working, my second brother was 16 years old, and I was 12 years old.
At that time, it was rumored in the village that Niu Qingying's character was not good, and he was not good for his own son, and he stole all the things from her ex-husband's house. ”
Liu Hairong recalled that when Niu Qingying first got married, she pretended to be hardworking and capable, took care of all the housework, and took care of the family in an orderly manner. However, it didn't take long for Niu Qingying's true face to be exposed, and she had nothing to do all day long, lying in bed.
At that time, Liu Hairong was still a student, and he had to rely on himself for everything in life. After school, she had to rush home to cook and laundry for Niu Qingying. For Liu Hairong, although Niu Qingying did not hurt her physically, it caused her great torture mentally.
Since Niu Qingying got married, our family has been restless. She was arguing with my dad and my grandma. She was very cunning and often stealed, and once stole my grandmother's antiques and even hid rice. ”
After Liu Hairong and his second brother paid Niu Qingying 200 yuan per month for living expenses in accordance with the law, they were dissatisfied and resentful of their stepmother's many shortcomings. However, on August 31, 2020, the court required Niu Qingying's four children to pay her 500 yuan per month for living expenses based on the average income of residents in Huai'an District.
In this case, since the eldest stepson has already participated in the work and does not need to be supported by Niu Qingying, he does not need to fulfill the maintenance obligation now. Despite the difficulties, Liu Hairong and the second brother still did their duty and showed their love and respect for their stepmother with practical actions.
When the case ended, Qi Liyang firmly promised that if his father could not take care of his mother in the future, he would take on the responsibility of raising him, after all, the grace of childbirth is more important than the mountain, and the grievances between mother and son will eventually be resolved.
With the help of legal means, Niu Qingying obtained a pension and protected his rights and interests. However, the power of the law is limited, it can restrain behavior, but it cannot manipulate feelings.
The family affection in those passing years is a precious wealth that Niu Qingying can never get back.