All problems eventually lead to self-growth, and we are all in this together.
Have you ever felt lonely and helpless in a silent night? 】
When the world falls silent, is there a moment when you feel like you are being swallowed up by endless darkness and can't extricate yourself?
Have you ever found yourself laughing at a gathering of friends, but your heart is like being weighed down by a heavy stone, and you can't breathe?
Or, acting impeccable at work and coming home to yourself in the mirror, not knowing who the person with a big smile is?
These may be the signs of depression deep in your heart.
Let's take a look at the story of Mr. Lin (pseudonym).
Mr. Lim is a passionate secondary school teacher who is always energetic, strict and loving to his students.
But in the dead of night, Mr. Lin felt an indescribable emptiness and sadness.
He began to doubt his worth and felt lost about the future.
Although he still maintains a standard smile during the day, behind that smile is a deep helplessness and loneliness.
Mr. Lin tried to deflect these emotions by working overtime and exercising, but found that the more he escaped, the stronger this invisible force became.
Until one day, he happened to see an article about depression on the Internet, and at that moment, he seemed to have found the name of his emotion.
He decided to seek the help of a professional counselor, hoping to find a way out of this state.
Mr. Lin's story may not be much different from you and me.
Behind this seemingly fast-paced and glamorous society, many people are experiencing depression to a greater or lesser extent.
But it's important that we face it up and find a solution.
In the following article, we will delve into the reasons behind depression, common wrong ways to cope with it and its harms, and how to gain insight into your emotional needs with the help of a professional counselor and achieve a breakthrough in cognitive improvement.
I hope that through these sharing, you can find your own way out and rediscover the light and hope of life.
[Behind the depression: what is the underlying cause?] 】
Let's continue to explore the story of Mr. Lim (not his real name) and dig deeper into the reasons behind his depression.
Although Mr. Lin has a bright appearance, behind the loneliness at night and the smile during the day, there is a true story of his struggle with depression.
First of all, the first challenge Mr. Lin faced was the constant pressure of work.
As a teacher, he has tremendous responsibilities and expectations, and these constant pressures make him feel overwhelmingly exhausted, but it is difficult to find an outlet for release.
His mood began to suffer, and he gradually became irritable and depressed.
This is what many people resonate with when faced with depression – a constant external stress, not handled properly, that gradually turns into an inner burden.
Exploring further into Mr. Lim's inner world, we find that the influence of his early experiences cannot be ignored.
Growing up, he experienced strict discipline and high expectations from his parents.
While these experiences shaped his success to some extent, they also left a deep mark on himself – the psychology of being demanding of himself and the fear of failure.
This kind of psychological burden accumulated from childhood to adulthood has become another soil for depression.
In addition to this, the lack of social support is also a key factor.
In Mr. Lin's life, although he has friends and family, he often chooses to hide his true feelings and does not want to cause trouble to others.
This feeling of isolation made him feel even more lonely and helpless, further deepening his depression.
On the emotional level, Mr. Lin often experiences a deep sense of powerlessness and hopelessness.
Even though he understands that there is a lot of good in the outside world, he can't feel it under the shadow of depression.
He lost faith in the future and no longer believed that things would improve, and this mindset stuck him in a seemingly unsolvable cycle.
At the level of thoughts and beliefs, we can see that Mr. Lin has a negative self-evaluation of himself.
He often doubts his abilities, turns a blind eye to his achievements, and always feels that he is not good enough.
These negative self-evaluations are repeated over and over again, becoming another exacerbating factor for depression.
Finally, at the level of expected needs, Mr. Lim's deep needs are to be understood, accepted, and to feel safe and belonging.
However, in real life, these needs are often not met, and he feels abandoned by the world and has nowhere to put his heart.
Through Mr. Lin's story, we can see that depression is not caused by a single factor, but is the result of the interaction of multiple factors.
From constant work stress to the effects of early life experiences, from the lack of social support to deep unmet psychological needs, each factor unconsciously provides the soil for the formation and development of depressive mood.
Understanding these underlying causes is crucial for us to find appropriate coping strategies to get out of the gloom of depression.
[Misconceptions of depressive mood: common wrong coping methods and their harms].
In Mr. Lim's depressive mood journey, we found several common but misleading coping strategies that not only failed to provide real help, but instead deepened his depression dilemma.
First, Mr. Lim tries to escape his emotional distress by indulging in his work.
Whenever feelings of loneliness and sadness come flooding his mind, he drows himself in his work, hoping to forget the pain by being busy.
At first glance, this seems like an efficient solution – after all, he has a lot of medals of success on his palmares.
However, the long hours of overwork left him physically and mentally exhausted, and he had no time to take care of his emotional needs, which led to a worse depression.
Then, Mr. Lin tried to fill the emptiness in his heart by over-socializing.
He frequently participates in various social events, hoping to find a sense of belonging and joy in the lively crowd.
But every time I get home, when I'm alone, that deep sense of loneliness and emptiness returns, even stronger than before.
The danger of this method is that it makes Mr. Lin gradually lose the ability to talk to himself, ignoring the solution of deep emotional problems.
In addition, Mr. Lin also tries to cope with depression through negative self-comfort, such as frequently telling himself:
"Everyone else has been in a worse situation than me. ”
Although this method temporarily comforted him, in the long run, it cultivated a negative attitude towards life and self-perception, which made it difficult for Mr. Lin to see his own worth and hope for the future, and exacerbated the distress of depression.
These wrong coping methods are so harmful because they are only temporary escapes and do not address the root cause of depression.
Indulging in work can lead to physical and mental exhaustion, over-socialization can lead to the loss of true self, and negative self-soothing can lead to more negative emotions.
Over time, Mr. Lim may find himself trapped in a vicious cycle where depression worsens, with serious effects on his health, relationships and quality of life.
Through Mr. Lin's case, we see the complexity behind depression, as well as the common wrong coping strategies when facing depression and its harms.
Although these strategies seem to provide Mr. Lin with short-term relief, they actually deepen his psychological dilemma.
This finding reminds us of the importance of choosing the right way to cope with depression.
Discovering Yourself in Counseling: Mr. Lin's Emotional Revelations
In our consultation and dialogue with Mr. Lim, we gradually gained insight into his predicament and confusion.
Mr. Lim expressed his insights into the stresses in his professional and personal life and how these can translate into depressed moods.
"Mr. Lin, when you say that you feel overwhelmed by your work and can't breathe, what do you really crave at that moment? ”
I asked softly.
He was silent for a moment, and a flash of realization flashed in his eyes"I think what I really want is to be understood and recognized, not just for my success as a teacher, but for my worth as a person. ”
Through such conversations, Mr. Lin began to realize that the way he had behaved before—burying himself in his work—was actually an escape, trying to gain inner satisfaction and security through external achievements.
However, this approach ignores his deep inner need to be understood and recognized.
In further **, we reveal Mr. Lin's emotional button, that is, his deeply buried self-values and expectations.
Many of his emotional reactions are actually direct manifestations of these unmet needs.
"Mr. Lin, think back, are there any moments when you feel particularly proud and contented even in the face of failure? ”
I asked this question in the hope of helping him discover his strengths and successes.
After reflection, Mr. Lin shared an experience of encountering challenges at work, but finally solving problems through his own efforts and innovation.
Yes, that time, I was very proud because I relied on my own strength to solve the problem, rather than relying on the evaluation of others. ”
This example reflects Mr. Lim's inner strength and resources, even in the shadow of depression, he still possesses problem-solving skills and creativity.
By identifying these strengths and resources, Mr. Lim began to re-examine his own value and realize that his value is not based solely on external achievements, but on inner strength and quality.
In the process of counseling, Mr. Lim gradually learned how to sort out his emotions, understand the needs behind them, and began to try to meet these needs in healthier ways, such as finding hobbies, strengthening connections with close friends, and learning how to express his emotions and needs in a positive way.
Through these conversations and insights, Mr. Lim not only recognized his own emotional dilemma, but more importantly, he discovered his inner strength and potential, and learned how to face life's challenges in a healthier and more positive way.
This process is a profound journey of self-discovery for Mr. Lim, and an important step towards a more fulfilling and fulfilling life after coming out of depression.
[Grasp the present, embrace the future: What's your next step?] 】
After a series of profound reflections and reflections, we walked together through Mr. Lin's journey of depression.
From identifying the deep needs behind emotions, to realizing the wrong way to cope, to discovering self-worth and inner strength, every step is an important part of Mr. Lin's self-growth and self-development.
In this process, we are not only talking about Mr. Lin's story, but also the story of everyone who is experiencing the challenge of depression.
Everyone has an unmet need deep down and is at risk of taking inappropriate steps to deal with life's challenges.
But the key is whether we are willing to face these challenges and have the courage to explore our inner world to find real solutions.
Now, I'd like to invite you to think about the following questions and welcome to share your views and experiences in the comments section:
How do you usually deal with life's stresses and challenges?
Do you think this method works?
Think back, was there a moment when you deeply felt that there was a deeper need hidden behind your emotions?
What's that demand?
When you recognized your inner strength and worth, was there a specific moment or experience that made you feel particularly proud or satisfied?
What was that experience like?
Hopefully, these thoughts will give you some inspiration and help you find new direction and hope in your own emotional journey.
Looking forward to hearing from you, let's support each other and grow together on this journey.
[Surprise Easter Eggs: 6 Perspectives to Help You Improve Your Self-Awareness].
The following questions are like a mirror to help you look at yourself, understand your true heart, and be aware of your behavior and thinking patterns in relationships.
You ready? Let's get started!
1.In the dead of night, do you feel an indescribable emptiness and sorrow? Multiple choices.
a.I often feel that almost every night will.
b.Occasionally, it is more obvious in certain situations.
c.It is rarely felt, only when extremely tired or stressed.
d.I barely felt it, and I was able to control my emotions very well.
e.Never feeling like I could always find a way to keep myself happy.
2.When you are at a gathering of friends, smiling on the surface, do you feel like you are being weighed down by a heavy stone in your heart? Multiple choices.
a.More often than not, I feel like I'm pretending to be happy.
b.Sometimes, especially when I feel out of sync with the people around me.
c.Rarely, only when I was forced to go to a party because I really didn't want to.
d.Hardly, I always fit in nicely with the atmosphere of the party.
e.Never, I always find pleasure in parties.
3.How do you usually cope with stress at work or in life? Multiple choices.
a.Distract yourself by working overtime or becoming obsessed with other things.
b.Try gathering with friends or family to relieve stress.
c.Choose to be alone, think quietly or do something you enjoy.
d.Seek help from a professional such as a counsellor.
e.Reduce stress by exercising or developing hobbies.
4.How do you see your emotional response in the face of a challenge or difficulty? Multiple choices.
a.I consider myself too sensitive and vulnerable.
b.I think my reaction is normal, and everyone has bad times.
c.I think I should be stronger and not show my emotions easily.
d.I try to stay optimistic and look for the positive side of each issue.
e.I will try to analyze the reasons behind the emotions and treat them rationally.
5.What is your favourite approach to finding help and support? Multiple choices.
a.Online resources, such as reading articles or participating in online communities.
b.Share it with a close friend or family member and seek their understanding and support.
c.Self-reflection to understand your emotions by reading books or writing in a journal.
d.Seek professional counselling or**.
e.Create positive experiences for yourself through activities such as travel and sports.
6.What is your attitude towards the future? Multiple choices.
a.Feeling lost and uneasy, full of worries about the future.
b.There is a certain expectation, but there is also anxiety and fear.
c.Calm attitude, both expectant and prepared to face challenges.
d.Feel excited and looking forward to it, and hopeful for the future.
e.Very confident and confident that you can overcome all odds.
Vote. Congratulations, you've completed another journey of self-discovery.
I hope that the perspective of these questions can help you to be more aware and understand yourself, and be more calm and determined on the road of life.
According to the troubles covered in this article,
I asked 1 related question to the AI consultant (Chun Buyuan).
Here's its first round of replies, and I hope its replies can give you some inspiration and help:
If you feel that this article has inspired youRemember to like + watch
Thank you for reading
———Original article from previous issues].
What is the disease of being irritable and easily out of control? In-depth psychological analysis (recommended collection).
How to vent negative emotions? This method works well (recommended collection).
Mood swings? Deep psychoanalysis (worth collecting).
Why is my emotions always controlled by others? Deep psychoanalysis (worth collecting).
What is the disease of not being able to control your emotions? That's so well said (worth collecting).