The first couple who wrote about the TV series "Fireworks People" two days ago: Li Yijin and Zhoudao. (To what extent can a man and a woman have a relationship before they can get married.) Today I want to talk about another couple: Tao Shuna and Zhang Xiaoyan. Tao Shuna has liked Zhang Xiaoyan since she was in junior high school, and regards Zhang Xiaoyan as a male god, idol, and role model. From junior high school to university to graduate school and doctorate, every important choice she made in her studies closely followed him and reproduced his past. How many years she has known Zhang Xiaoyan, she has liked him for many years. Fate will become a person with a heart, and under her various straight-ball pursuits and confessions, Zhang Xiaoyan finally saw her and put her in his heart. In the early days of the relationship, everything was very romantic. But after living together, problems arose. Tao Shuna slowly discovered that the male god she had always admired and admired would have such a sloppy side in private. When I was home alone, my clothes were thrown everywhere, and the garbage I had eaten was left on the table. 
Also, she thought that the omnipotent scholar would actually delay the draft, and every ** was rushed out all night before the deadline.
What shocked her even more was that he told her in person that in fact, he had never really loved the academic research of aerospace science and the honor of being a scholar and a god. He also hates to travel at every turn, and stays at the research base for several months. Rather than doing experiments, he wants to lie at home and play games and live as he pleases.
In an instant, Tao Shuna felt that she didn't know the person in front of her.
The aura on his body in the past, his much-anticipated glory, his tall and handsome image, were shattered, shattered, and even festered at once.
At this moment, he was far from what she imagined and what she expected him, and there was a world of difference.
They had a big fight because of this, and both wanted to break up.
After watching this plot, I have been thinking that most of the time, we think we love someone very much, whether we love him in real or imaginary him.
When we love someone, we fall in love with his title, identity, status, aura, or the person himself.
When one day we suddenly find that the person we love is completely different from what we have thought and imagined for a long time, what should we do?
Perhaps, how you fall in love is not particularly important, and there is nothing remarkable, how to love is what everyone should consider, and it is the most important thing. 
When Tao Shuna tore off the perfect filter for Zhang Xiaoyan, Zhang Xiaoyan actually disenchanted Tao Shuna. He also felt that the girl who always appeared by his side in a lively, sweet or cute manner, and always maintained a delicate and elegant appearance, was two extremes of her in real life. During the days of living together, there was always hair in the toilet that fell out when she washed her hair blocking the drain; Her makeup never gets put away when she's done using it; All spread out on the dressing surface; She didn't put the dirty clothes she changed into the dirty laundry basket in time.
Her shoes are never kept in the shoe closet, but one is thrown in the living room and the other is on the stairs; When she slept, she snored, grinded her teeth, and kicked people. It's not like the usual girl who looks quiet and well-behaved. After only a month or two of living together, they each spied on each other's unbearable side and were disappointed that the other party did not meet their ideal image. I think many couples have experienced similar situations to them. After close contact, I suddenly found that the person was not as glamorous and perfect as it looked from afar. Even many times, what the other party does will refresh your cognition, making you wonder if you were blind at the beginning. 
You've seen countless times when the city is lit up, with its neon flashes, traffic, and bustling charm. But have you ever seen a city at three or four o'clock in the morning, where the lights are dim, and the floor is full of fruit peels to be cleaned, barbecue skewers, empty wine bottles, and white garbage bags.
Even though the romance is as vast as the wilderness, spring flowers are vibrant, purple and red. But when the long winter comes, the grass and trees dry up, the land is cracked, the wind and sand are everywhere, and countless depressions occur. What I mean by this is that people are not one-sided, and everyone has their own brightness and vividness, as well as the darkness and cunning that cannot be seen in the shadows.
When two people are together, if they want to get along comfortably and go on for a long time, you have to learn to break your own inherent cognition and learn to accept each other's not-so-good times. In the beginning, you can long, worship, and look up to the other person because of their appearance, identity, talent, and ability. But over time, you have to learn to peel back these external things and see the essence of it.
I see that I can do everything at work, but I can't tell the difference between salt and sugar in life. I saw that when I communicated with outsiders, I was comfortable and clean, but when I got home, I didn't even bother to take off my shoes and collapsed on the sofa.
After seeing them as they are, and being familiar with their unbearable situation, if you can accept it, tolerate it, understand and respect it, you can develop it further.
If not, stop as soon as possible. 
Love is a very fantasy and very realistic thing. Some people are disappointed because they get too close to each other and see through each other, and they go their separate ways. Some people get to know each other more and become more familiar with each other, but they love each other more deeply and closely. The latter must have experienced more learning and running-in, and repeatedly pushing, pulling, and confirming in getting along day after day, before finally deciding that they want to continue to live together. At the end of the day, love doesn't start with that confession, it doesn't start with the establishment of a relationship, or even from the day two people fall at the same time. 
The real beginning of love is when each other abandons expectations, reduces expectations, takes off the filter, and can't help but want to hug and kiss and cherish each other after being honest. Of course, I will be proud of your excellence, and I am glad to see you standing at the top surrounded by flowers, and admired by thousands of people in the crowd. But I also value your vulnerability, your low self-esteem, your sensitivity, your badness, and your embarrassment. I accept your shortcomings as much as I admired your strengths. And having seen your darkness and knowing how fierce the world is, I will hold your hand harder. Because you are the one I chose from the vast universe.