Home is a harbor for the soul to dock after experiencing the difficulties of the world.
Because of having a home, life will not be as shaky as duckweed, and no matter how far the family goes, we still have to gather together in the end.
Everyone knows the importance of family and is trying to build a happy family. But in real life, there are always some families who are going to poverty step by step.
It is even more difficult to change from poor to rich; Going from rich to poor is a breeze. We need to be vigilant at all times.
The Ming Dynasty writer Ling Mengchu wrote a story of "Zhang Funiang's single-minded chastity", allowing us to see the ups and downs of the family. Obviously, there are four signs in the family that mean downfall.
First, spoil your children and grandchildren, bringing the root cause.
During the Song Dynasty, Suzhou had a ** calledZhu Jingxian。Later, he was transferred to Sichuan to work as a tea horse envoy.
In his hometown in Suzhou, Zhu Jingxian's sonZhu Xunand the daughter of the Fan familyFan'sSettle on a family affair. But when Zhu Xun accompanied his father in Sichuan, he felt too lonely and decided to marry another wife.
How can a marriage be reversed? Zhu Jingxian stood up against "repentance". Zhu Xun thought for a while and said, "Then find a concubine first, and talk about marriage later." ”
There is a way, there are no rules, there is no circle; Marriage pays attention to "Ming media is marrying".Zhu Jingxian knew the rules, but because he doted on his son, he violated the rules - he agreed to his son's request for a concubine. Since then, there has been an extra daughter-in-law in the familyZhang FuniangIn fact, in many families, because their children are grinding hard bubbles, parents grit their teeth and agree to their children's requests. Whether it's spending money or emotional problems, step by step it has become a pattern of "connivance".
There is a local saying in the countryside: "Filial piety comes out under the stick." ”
Children should be disciplined more, and violations should be stopped in time. It can't be said that children are not sensible, and adults are not sensible. Everyone hates the loser, but the doting of the parents is cultivating the loser.
A family with crooked upper beams and crooked lower beams.
Those parents who respond to their needs, on the surface, are love, but in fact, love is given to the wrong person and fall into the trap of tenderness.
Second, the husband and wife are separated and quarrelsome.
After Zhu Xun took a concubine, the Fan family rented a civilian boat and worked tirelesslysent her daughter Fan to Sichuan to get married
After the Fan family saw Zhu Xun, they were furious and forced Zhu Xun to drive Zhang Funiang back to her parents' house.
At that time, Zhang Funiang was pregnant and hoped to be able to open up the net, but the Zhu and Fan families were ruthless.
A good family has been in trouble ever since. Although Zhu Xun and Fan are married, they have hidden pain emotionally.
Husband and wife were originally birds of the same forest, but in the current catastrophe, there are two endings: flying separately and flying together.
The reason why some couples can't get through the hardships together is not that they are incapable and don't want their families to get better. It's that they have selfishness from the beginning and don't want to be together for the rest of their lives.
The ancients said: "The good things in the world are not strong, and the colored clouds are easy to scatter and the glass is broken." ”Marriage is a happy event, and the husband and wife are unbreakable strength, but if there is a crack in the marriage, it is like glass, either not touched, or scattered into a piece of slag.
Let's say the husband wants to start a business, but the wife doesn't agree. The husband wants to borrow money, but the wife is adamantly opposed. If two people have been in a tug-of-war for a long time, and no one is convinced, the family will not be rich, and it will develop in the direction of despair.
Family development is like sailing against the current, and if you don't advance, you will retreat. And the source of regression lies in the husband and wife themselves.
Third, there are "sick people" in the family, and wealth is not guaranteed.
There are unpredictable circumstances.
After Zhu Xun and Fan got married for a while, they suddenly fell ill. After several months of seeking medical advice, it did not improve. In the end, he died young.
At the same time, Zhu Jingxian received an order from the imperial court to leave Sichuan and return to Suzhou to take up his post.
A family, tossed many times in a row, can ** bear?
There is a very inspirational saying: "The more you toss, the better your life." ”
In the eyes of many people, tossing is an opportunity to make yourself stand on the top. In fact, if you toss too much and go in the wrong direction, you will bring disaster.
In real life, one person gets sick and drags down the whole family. Spending money is like running water, everyone complains, and those who are sick do not see hope. Health is the foundation of family happiness and the confidence to start a business.
Of course, in today's advanced science and technology, if the body is sick, it will get better after **; There is no way to cure a sickness in the heart.There are always some people who have ghosts in their hearts, are poor in their hearts, lack morality, and create heart diseases. As a result, the family's wealth is lost step by step. Especially those who regard their families as enemies and villains as good people, take their own money and call outsiders brothers, and their hearts are not light. Fourth, there is a lack of labor and low income.
After the death of Zhu Jingxian's sonThere is not a single young and strong worker in the family, and there is not a single child。There is no hope in sight for families.
What does it mean to be bleak at night?
It is not necessarily a lack of money, not necessarily a lack of a house, but a pattern in which the family has no income** and no one is thriving.
In the 70s of the last century, a family in our village could not solve the problem of food and clothing, but the family was full of vitality. When they met, they said, "We have four brothers, what are we afraid of?" ”
Now, this family has become five families, all of whom have bought houses in the county, and each of them has savings.
People, as long as they are not lazy, they can create wealth with their hands.
When people get old, it's hard to have such good luck. From the perspective of social reality, it is more difficult for women to make a lot of money than men. Therefore, we use words such as "orphans, widows, and no successors" to describe a failed family.
The ancients said: "If the family style is not right, disaster is not far away." ”
But what is family style?
Most people believe that family style is "filial piety and harmony". In fact, the word "family style", taken apart, is the vane of a family. It should also include the education style of parents, the career development of the family, whether women can be good housekeepers, whether men have the ability to make money, the number of children and grandchildren, etc.
When the family is in ruins, stop the loss immediately. According to the above reasons, the opposite is done. One is to discipline children strictly; second, husband and wife respect and love each other; the third is to cherish the healthy body; Fourth, it can continue the incense.
Friends, for the family, it is a good thing to be able to be ashamed and courageous.