Ms. Bingxin once said affectionately: "A mellow and harmonious family is the source of all happiness." ”
A family full of warmth and harmony not only needs to be full of love in the heart, but also needs the interaction and flow of words.
Nowadays, many families are becoming more alienated and cold, and the crux of this is often that family members only communicate with each other in matters and fall into a silent vacuum in ordinary days.
It is important to know that most of the small but real moments of happiness in daily life are embedded in seemingly trivial and unpretentious conversations. These conversations, which seem to lack depth on a daily basis, are in fact a good medicine to soothe our tired souls.
In real life, those who have a harmonious family relationship are especially good at weaving and sharing these seemingly "useless" words with each other.
It is these "nonsense" that build emotional bridges, nourish the soil of family affection, and make family life more warm, harmonious and vibrant.
In the nagging of parents, there is the deepest longing
In an affectionate essay by the famous Chinese writer Jia Pingwa, he fondly records the simple and deep emotional bond with his mother. My mother has been rooted in the countryside all her life, and although she has never received a formal education, she nourishes the family with her simple life wisdom.
Mother loves cooking, which is a kind of love from the bottom of her heart, she is always worried about whether Jia Pingwa is full, and whenever she sits around the table, she always takes the trouble to persuade him to eat a few more bites of food.
When Jia Pingwa was immersed in the world of pen and ink, his mother felt sorry for his hard work and repeatedly whispered in his ear: "How can I finish writing words in this world?" Why not go out and relax? This seemingly insipid inquiry actually contains the mother's deep care and consideration.
Every time he went to the city to live temporarily, his mother would sew clothes for Jia Pingwa to resist the cold winter, and often reminded him to pay attention to keeping warm and adding clothes.
In Jia Pingwa's memory, his mother always seems to have endless "trivial words". Whether it was the fact that the living room lights were not turned off due to the presence of too many guests, or whether the contents of the house were a little old and they were proposed to be replaced, his mother would talk to him carefully, even if those topics may not seem so important at the time.
In the golden autumn season, when the fruits in the courtyard are ripe, my mother will always carefully select and ask someone to send this sweet concern to Jia Pingwa in the city.
After years of precipitation, Jia Pingwa suddenly realized that his mother's seemingly ordinary chatter is actually the most precious treasure in the world, and every sentence carries incomparably deep maternal love and endless care.
There is a saying on the Internet that is deeply rooted in people's hearts: "Before the age of twenty, you may think that your parents' advice is too frequent; However, when you reach the age of 40, you will deeply appreciate how precious it is to have the advice of your parents. ”
As we grow older and become more independent, we enter the society and devote ourselves to our own work and social circles, and the time we spend with our parents at home and listen to their trivial words becomes less and less.
Sometimes, we may even show a hint of impatience with our parents' meticulous care, and see those loving whispers as a kind of pressure or burden.
The way parents convey their love to us may not be exactly what we expect, but patiently accepting and listening to their every nagging is a manifestation of filial piety as a child.
We must learn to give them more positive responses, not to let their parents' hearts be left out in the cold, and not to let our lives leave regrets that we have not been able to cherish this family affection.
After all, every word in our parents' mouths contains their deepest concern for us, and it contains the greatest irreplaceable happiness in our lives.
Time flies, let's set aside as much time as possible for our parents, and don't let them end up quietly closing in loneliness every time they try to open up the conversation.
In the gossip of the partner, there is the most sincere love
Netizen @王莉, shared a thought-provoking ** record on the online platform, vividly showing her warm interaction with her husband an hour before going to bed every night.
In this **, Wang Li and his wife showed a different mode of getting along with husband and wife, they did not fall into the silence day after day, but chose to share a "pillow whisper" time before going to bed every night. The two poured out their hearts to exchange each other's mood changes, their experiences and experiences of the day, and even weave a beautiful vision for the future together. Whenever the conversation touches on interesting stories, the laughter of the two is as innocent and cheerful as a child, and it is full of happiness.
Although the marriage has gone through three years, their relationship is still as sweet and touching as their first love, and this deep friendship is enviable. The ** quickly became popular on the Internet, and was praised by the majority of netizens as a "model teaching material" for the harmonious coexistence of husband and wife, and actively recommended it to their respective partners, hoping to draw nutrients from it to nourish love.
Indeed, emotional communication occupies an irreplaceable place in intimate relationships. Any form of indifference and perfunctory can become an invisible weapon that erodes love, and it is a gentle and profound harm to true love.
In the seemingly trivial and ordinary daily conversations, it precisely contains the most sincere and warm emotional expression between husband and wife, which is a deep love that cannot be measured in words.
In a touching conversation on CCTV's in-depth talk show "Meet the Big Coffee", the host threw a heartfelt question to Robin Li, the founder of the empire: "In your life course and career, which figure has the most far-reaching influence?" Robin Li did not hesitate for a moment, and responded firmly and affectionately: "Undoubtedly, my wife played a decisive role. ”
Robin Li has spent more than 20 years with his virtuous helpers, and even as the years go by, they still maintain frequent and in-depth exchanges and interactions every day. Whether it's the trivial bits of life or the flash of inspiration for innovative thinking, it can become a topic they share. Despite being a giant in the industry and busy with affairs, Robin Li has always cherished every moment of dialogue with his wife with a sincere listening posture and sincere response.
In the face of the ups and downs of the company's journey, Robin Li said frankly: "Whenever I encounter challenges, I am eager to discuss countermeasures with my wife. "The couple are not only loving couples who bond with deep affection, but also close friends who are soul-bound and talk about everything.
The famous writer Mai Jia once profoundly pointed out: "One of the important criteria for whether there is true love between a couple is whether they are willing to share the trivial words in life and whether they are willing to patiently listen to each other's seemingly ordinary words." ”
In their daily conversations, although the words themselves may not have grand meanings, they contain the power to intertwine each other's lives. It is this sense of participation that enables them to learn to sincerely give back to each other's feelings in the process of sharing joys and savoring joys and sorrows, so as to build a solid emotional foundation in ordinary days.
Therefore, husbands and wives are not only partners who spend their daily lives together, but also comrades-in-arms who are in the same boat and resist the storms of life. In this seemingly insignificant "nonsense", they quietly sublimated each other's emotional temperature, strengthened the bond of marriage, and made it last for a long time.
In the interaction between parents and children, there is the most natural guidance
Mr. Wu Zhihong, a famous psychologist, once profoundly pointed out: "In Chinese family education, what is most lacking is precisely the ability to communicate with children in daily trivial matters, that is, the often said 'talking nonsense'." ”
In daily life, most parents seem to ignore the importance of casual conversation with their children, and their attention is often focused on the child's physical health, basic living needs, and academic performance.
However, in reality, if parents can devote more time in their daily lives to sharing those seemingly inconsequential "nonsense" with their children, the effect may be far greater than rigid and rigid indoctrination.
These seemingly innocuous conversations, like spring rain, quietly nourish the child's heart, and have a value that cannot be underestimated in building a parent-child relationship, cultivating children's emotional cognition and social skills.
In the popular reality show "Talent Discovery Group", a young boy named Bian Yitan attracted the attention of the public with his outstanding performance. Despite being only three and a half years old, Yitan's talent and wisdom are amazing.
Not only is he familiar with the names of various dinosaurs, but he is also able to analyze many complex scientific phenomena in simple terms, and his breadth and depth of knowledge transcend the boundaries of age. In addition, Yitan's vocabulary reserve is also quite amazing, and he even has the ability to read picture books independently. After the professional evaluation of the program team, Yitan's language comprehension ability far exceeded the average level of children of the same age, with a score of 999 points, which is amazing.
However, Yitan's excellence is not accidental, and behind it is the hard work of parents to accompany and educate. Every day at home, my father would devote at least an hour, or even more, to in-depth communication with him and read picture books together. This kind of high-quality parent-child interaction makes Yitan like a lively and cute little chatterbox, always happy to share his thoughts and thoughts.
In this seemingly rambling conversation, Yitan not only accumulated a rich vocabulary, but more importantly, his curiosity, imagination and expressive skills were fully nourished and improved.
As Dr. Suskind states in his book The Language of Parents: "The development of children's mathematical skills, spatial logical thinking, perseverance, self-discipline, moral perception, and empathy are all closely related to the vocabulary they are exposed to in early childhood." ”
Parents are the initiation teachers of their children, and the initial cultivation of children's abilities often comes from parent-child interactions in daily life. Those seemingly ordinary parent-child dialogues are actually the "spiritual nourishment" that helps children thrive.
Every interaction with children is not only a journey of exploration of the child's inner world, but also a key moment for parents to guide their children to excellence in a subtle way.
When parents fail to fully establish a communicative and interactive relationship with their children in their daily lives, and are only enthusiastic about indoctrination and preaching, children will invisibly build a wall of hearts, gradually alienate and avoid real communication.
Wise parents know how to skillfully weave knowledge and truth into the daily conversations, and they quietly open their children's hearts and guide them to open their hearts and accept the nourishment of wisdom in a relaxed and unobtrusive conversation.
The famous French philosopher Montaigne once had a profound insight that "living in harmony with one's family is one of life's extraordinary achievements." "Home is not only a physical space for us to live in, but also a spiritual harbor for emotional nourishment, and an emotional charging station for us to draw strength from the chaos of the world.
In the family, those seemingly trivial and useless chatters are just like a lubricant that makes family affection flow endlessly, so that each family member deeply feels the deep and comfortable love.
The caring daily advice from parents, the joy of life from one partner to another, and the innocent questions of children full of curiosity all form the cornerstone of a family's invaluable sense of security.
Verbal communication, listening to each other, this ordinary and real interaction, is undoubtedly the highest happiness in the world.
For the rest of our lives, let us all have relatives who can share "gossip", and weave a warm and free family environment together, in which we can feel the peace and belonging from the bottom of our hearts.