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In Dream of Red Mansions, the couplet on the lintel of Jiafu "The world is full of knowledge, and the practice of human feelings is the article" contains a profound philosophy of life. While we can't be bound by the red tape of the world, that doesn't mean we should ignore the importance of the world and human feelings. On the contrary, being well-versed in the world and being witty and tactful is a kind of survival wisdom that we need to master.
In this complex society, we need to restrain our desire to refute. When we are confronted with different perspectives and opinions, do not rush to refute them, but learn to listen and understand. Refutation often only complicates things, while listening and understanding can help us better grasp the other person's position and needs, so that we can better solve the problem.
We also need to restrain our desire to talk. While confiding can make us feel comfortable and satisfied, too much confiding can leave others feeling tired and bored. Therefore, we should learn to control our desire to talk at the right time and leave some space and leeway for others.
We also need to restrain our desire to show off. While showing off can make us feel proud and satisfied, excessive showing off can be offensive and uncomfortable for others. Therefore, we should learn to be humble and low-key, not always talk about our achievements and advantages, but to prove our worth with practical actions.
The balance between self-motivation and winning is like walking on a tightrope, which requires a high level of wisdom and concentration. Just like the choice between tiptoe and jumping, only with the right amount of effort can you touch the edge of success. If you push too hard, you'll only get yourself more damage when you fall. Just like Mr. Jin Yong's Mei Fanggu, she has a beautiful appearance and outstanding talent, but she lost her love and life due to excessive desire to win. She questioned Shi Qing why he won Min Rou in many aspects, but he couldn't get his love. Shi Qing's answer revealed the truth: it was precisely because she was too strong that he felt inferior and unworthy.
Life is not an arena, and there is no need to be number one all the time. Excessive scramble will only cost us more and make happiness out of reach. Wise people know how to "advance as retreat", and they maintain a normal heart while pursuing progress. They understand that in life, instead of asking others, it is better to adjust themselves. Self-denial, controlling emotions, and enduring resentment are all the only ways for us to cultivate our hearts. Only when we learn to adjust ourselves and have a precaution in our hearts can we achieve something; Only when we know how to exercise restraint can we achieve steady and far-reaching results. Therefore, let's keep a peaceful heart while pursuing progress. Don't let the desire to win and lose blind us to miss out on the beautiful scenery in life. Remember, only when we become better ourselves, will there be scenery in our hearts, and the world will have scenery. In short, being well-versed in the world and being witty and tactful is a kind of survival wisdom, and restraining one's desire to refute, confide, show off, and win or lose is an important means to achieve this wisdom. Only by learning to control our emotions and desires can we get along better with others and better cope with life's challenges.