Some time ago, I received the mother of a 14-year-old girl.
During the child's depression, she once feltThe child is too rebellious, disobedient to discipline, and has an abnormal brain.
As long as the child mentions "suspension", "disgust with school" and "illness", she will beat and scold at every turn.
It wasn't until the child scratched his wrist that she panicked and took the child to see a doctor.
"I almost lost my child because of ignorance".
The girl's name is Yingying, and she is the youngest depressed person I have ever received.
Yingying's mother said that the first time she noticed the abnormality was in the first semester of the second year of junior high school.
One day, her daughter suddenly told her that she was veryI hate school, I hate my classmates.
She felt that her daughter was not sensible, and criticized Yingying for not knowing how to take the initiative to make friends.
Unexpectedly, the warbler cried and yelled directly:"You know the!”
She was very angry and felt that her daughter had just entered puberty and was so rebellious, so she slapped her directly.
After that, the warbler became a little strange, except for the occasional roar, which was to shut herself in the house.
The mother and daughter become strangers until a box of contraceptives appears in the warbler's house.
She was mad, she felt that her daughter's brain was broken, she slapped her hard, and scolded her for being shameless!
Until her daughter fell asleep, she cried and regretted that she found a bloody scratch on her daughter's arm.
Without thinking about it, I took my daughter to the hospital by taxi, but the doctor said:
"The child may have psychological problems. ”
This was the first time she realized that her daughter was sick.
went to a tertiary hospital for examination, and Yingying was diagnosedModerate depression + anxiety.
She has always felt that her daughter is just entering adolescence, rebellious and addicted, and it is good to get through it.
As everyone knows, because of the big mistake caused by ignorance, she almost lost her child.
Adolescent rebellion can be a detractor of depression
Parents who regard depression as a rebellious are not the only ones in Yingying's mother.
Adolescent rebellion is the consensus of almost all parents.
The child has tantrums, disobedience, school boredom and truancy, or is irritable or introverted, which makes parents very worried.
But few people pay attentionAdolescence is also a time of high incidence of depression.
The detection rate of depressive symptoms among adolescents in China was 246%, in contrast to very low recognizability.
This means that even if many children are depressed, parents will not pay attention to it, and only treat the child as rebellious"Just be patient."
However, the damage of depression to children far outweighs the consequences of rebellion.
The Higher Humans" research institute published an article, and scientists found after research:
People with depression often have abnormal brain network activity.
These abnormalities will make the child not feel happyThe psychological gap is large, affecting the speed of thinking, behavior, memory, and cognitionWait.
At least it can lead to childrenReduced basic living capacity, HeavyHarm your child's brain, the consequences are unimaginable.
In addition, it is understandable that adults cannot tell whether children are simply rebellious or depressed.
Because depression in children is very different from depression:
They are not all depressed, mainly manifested as:Irritable, slow-thinking, or extreme.
In summary:RebelliousMost of them are caused by the contradiction between children's independent needs and parents' refusal to let go
Depression,It is a disease that harms many aspects of the child's thinking, cognition and behavior.
Yingying's mother recalled that when her daughter was depressed, her whole person was chaotic, and her brain seemed to be covered with a layer of fog.
Except for the high mood when he roared and quarreled, he was like a deflated ball the rest of the time, and he was not interested in anything.
Therefore, if the child is simply rebellious and is more affected by hormones, there will be no brain injury.
But if you are suffering from depression, you need to pay attention to it and don't let your child fall into the abyss.
How can I tell if my child is depressed?
All depression and rebellion are actually early signs.
Before the child reaches puberty and has an abnormalityParents should pay attention to this matter.
To determine whether a child is rebellious or depressed, you can first observe two aspects of the child:
On the one hand, it depends on the vitality of the child.
There is a good saying that the opposite of depression is not happiness, but vitality.
The rebellious child, despite his short temper and-for-tat with his parents, is still full of vitality in his life.
Even if they skip school and go online and fight with their classmates, it is enough to show that they are in good shape.
But if the child is depressed, his life is a withered flower.
Drowsiness, sluggishness, sluggish brain, and low air pressure, are all distress signals that need to be vigilant.
On the other hand, look at the child's "core beliefs".
Cognitive psychology believes that the way of thinking and cognition is the key to determining whether a child will be depressed.
This kind of underlying cognition is a person's "core belief".
Common distorted cognitions, such as whether a child existsBlack and white, overgeneralized, extreme imaginationand other mindsets.
In layman's terms,Looking at problems in an extreme way, he is always negative and negative, and Xi accustomed to self-criticism ......
These have become Xi, and the child is likely to be depressed.
Of course, the above two methods are just to help you check simply, if the child's condition is serious, you need to find a professional counselor in time to solve it.
Children are depressed, what should parents do?
None of the children are suddenly depressed. From an abnormal growth environment, Xi a negative attitude, then form negative beliefs, and finally the way of thinking is completely distorted. When it comes to the special time of puberty, everything explodes.
As a parent, it is important to pay attention to your child before he or she enters puberty.
There's no need to think of adolescence as a flood beast, and there's no need to be overly anxious.
The right way to raise children is the best way to heal children.
Today's children have frequent psychological problems, and they are under more pressure than they imagined.
Hug your child, understand your child, and give your child unconditional love.
Don't wait for your child to become rebellious, addicted, depressed, and feel sorry!
This idea is suitable for parents of children of any age.
Give your children the best care and love, they deserve all the good things in this world.