The remarried wife wants the AA system, aunt: yes, but I have 5 conditions, uncle: the abacus is good
As people get older, they often feel lonely and lonely. Many seniors are eager to find a suitable partner in their later years and enjoy the years of retirement together. However, finding a suitable partner is not an easy task, and you need to consider whether the three views are the same, whether the personality is matched, and whether the child agrees. While there are many considerations, the most difficult issue is often the dispute over money.
Aunt Wu, who is in her sixties, recently started dating a 63-year-old Uncle Zhao, and the two received a marriage certificate. However, the happy atmosphere is hit by a money dispute. The uncle proposed to adopt the AA system for future expenses, which aroused the dissatisfaction of the aunt. After that, the two sides put forward their own conditions, but they fell into a dispute. The uncle suspected that the aunt had other plans, saying that he was not confused and would not be moved by the aunt's calculations. The following is a detailed explanation of the dispute.
61-year-old Aunt Wu's heart:
When I first met Lao Zhao, I felt a little wrong with him, thinking that he was stingy and not big-hearted. Sure enough, after remarrying, he actually put forward the request for the AA system, which is really ridiculous. Usually I am responsible for all the housework, but he still has AA, which is really incredible.
Since he can make such a request, I have the right to make my request. I made five reasonable requests in a row, but Lao Zhao didn't agree to any of them. I was surprised that he said I couldn't fool him. Even if we have only known each other for a short time, why do we have to do all this calculations when we are married?
In the beginning, I lived alone in my old house because the long period of loneliness almost took my breath away. Later, I met Lao Zhao through a friend's introduction. As soon as we met, I thought he was very stingy, with small eyes and sinister eyes. At that time, I didn't really like him very much, and I even wanted to find a new partner. But the persuasion of my friends and Lao Zhao's offensive finally made me succumb.
Although Lao Zhao has an average appearance, he is eloquent and sweet, and he is also very willing to pay for me. So, I agreed to be with him. After we confirmed our relationship and started living together, Lao Zhao spent money when he ate out, bought groceries, and watched movies, but I didn't treat him badly either. I cleaned my house spotlessly every day and cooked three meals. In comparison, he didn't even pay enough for me to hire a babysitter.
At the beginning, Lao Zhao was very good to me. Although he doesn't do housework, he will help me wash my feet, wash my underwear, and even rub my shoulders when I am tired, which is very caring. I was completely fascinated by him and thought he was a man who could be entrusted with his life. Later, however, he made those ridiculous demands.
After living together for a while, we both felt suitable and got a marriage license. We went to a dumpling restaurant that night to celebrate, but when I got home that night, I sensed that he was smiling and seemed a little unhappy. At the time, I thought I was too busy and didn't care.
For the next few days, our lives were normal, but his face became more and more ugly. I thought he was sick or that there was something wrong with my children, so I asked him with concern, and finally he told me that the problem was mine. What the hell is going on, I traced the source, and he finally confessed the truth.
Lao Zhao said that his monthly pension is 3,000, while mine is 4,000. Although it was about the same, he felt that the cost of going out every day was counted on him, and he couldn't stand it. His pension is almost spent every month, and he wants to save some money so that he will not be strapped for money in the future. I was a little surprised to hear that. Did he forget that I bought all the clothes and pants he was wearing? Aren't the fruits and vegetables at home my money? What's more, why didn't you mention this issue before getting married, but only after you got the license?
Later, I asked Lao Zhao again about how to deal with this problem. Lao Zhao squirmed in embarrassment and said that he wanted to adopt the AA system, that is, the two of us shared the monthly expenses. The specific operation is that each purchase must be recorded in the account book, each bear the personal expenses, and the settlement will be made at the end of the month, and the more will be made up, and the less will be made up by the other party.
When I heard this proposal, I was not happy. However, looking at Lao Zhao's slightly apologetic expression and soft eyes, I relented and agreed to his AA system, but I didn't realize that this was actually a disadvantage to me, and it was completely an arrangement in his favor.
In the rest of our lives, Lao Zhao and I always kept a record of the accounts, whether it was the cost of eating out or the small expenses of buying a toothbrush, they were all recorded in the account book, forming a different kind of life spectacle. However, there is a problem with the AA system, although the expenses are separated, the housework has become my own responsibility, why is this her?
I endured a few days of housework on my own and couldn't accept such a situation. The thought that even the purchase of a small item has to be recorded in the ledger so trivial, and the cleaning of the bathroom is done by me, makes me feel dissatisfied. I tried to get him to take on some of the housework, but Lao Zhao is a person with his own opinions, and when I propose to let him do the housework, I always find various reasons to avoid it.
As time went on, I just couldn't take it anymore and simply stopped doing housework. As a result, the home became a state where neither of them was willing to do anything, and gradually became dirty and messy. The floor was covered with dust and paper, the bathroom was filled with an unbearable smell, and the kitchen was so greasy that you couldn't even step on it. It's really unbearable.
I am a person with a habit of cleanliness and cannot stand such a housework situation. However, Lao Zhao seemed to be at ease, lying comfortably on the sofa full of clothes, as if it had nothing to do with all this. I can't bear it, and since he can make a request, I must also make my request, otherwise I will suffer.
Finally, one day, I found Lao Zhao and told him that I had five requirements to make, otherwise this life would not be able to continue. Lao Zhao rolled his little eyes and motioned for me to continue.
First of all, I asked that the housework be divided equally. Since Lao Zhao and I started living together, he has hardly participated in any household chores. It's not that Lao Zhao is lazy, it's that he doesn't know how to do it, and he doesn't even have such a consciousness at all. Before, because Lao Zhao was spending money outside, I volunteered to take on the housework, but now the situation is different.
Since the AA system has been adopted, I have no objection to the cost being borne by myself. But housework cannot be done by one person alone, after all, we are two people living together. However, I usually do the housework, and Lao Zhao doesn't even sweep the ground. I can't accept this unfairness, the housework must be divided equally, so that it is more just and reasonable.
The second requirement was to provide me with an additional monthly fee for cooking. Although we have implemented the AA system for purchasing ingredients, the responsibility for cooking falls entirely on me. From selecting ingredients to washing, cutting, and cooking, this series of steps may seem simple, but the actual work is not small. Lao Zhao is not good at cooking, so he needs a certain amount of financial compensation.
In addition, Lao Zhao's relatives are in an endless stream and often visit. Whether it's the meals I prepare or the reception, I have to work a lot every time. Moreover, these feasts usually have to cook three or four dishes, which is very tiring. If I don't give some financial compensation, it's really unbearable for me to bear this hardship alone.
The third requirement is that our children must not interfere in our lives. Lao Zhao's daughter is arrogant in words and deeds, and every time Lao Zhao spends money for me before, she is always sneering. Even though we have implemented the AA system, she has become quieter, but she still gives us advice on our lives from time to time.
I understand that the reason why she is like this is just to pay attention to Lao Zhao's pension. Because of this, she persuaded Lao Zhao to implement the AA system with me, and Lao Zhao also followed her advice, but did not understand that his happiness was his own choice and had nothing to do with others. Although I chose to tolerate this time, if there is any interference in life next time, I will not be able to accept it.
The fourth requirement is that my freedom cannot be restricted. Every time I wanted to go square dancing, Lao Zhao always disagreed, let alone participate in social dancing. I'm a dancer, and living with an AA partner is already suffocating, not to mention that the freedom to dance is not allowed.
In the future, I will go to square dance, and Lao Zhao can no longer interfere with me. In addition, I would like to travel with my relatives and friends at any time. When I have free time, I might even go to my son's house for a few days. Although these activities all cost money, since the AA system has been implemented, Lao Zhao can no longer restrict my freedom.
The last requirement is that Lao Zhao must follow my advice. I'm not a bossy person, and I don't want him to listen to me for everything, but at least I have experience in some things, such as housekeeping and hygiene. In the future, I hope that Lao Zhao can follow my arrangements in these aspects, after all, he is not good at life compared to me. Although the cost is AA system, there are some things that I can call the shots, so that I can keep the family in order and work better together. After listening to my five requests, Lao Zhao frowned and stared at the ground intently, I felt a little impatient, and couldn't wait to ask him if he agreed, but he turned his head and sneered: "You are quite thoughtful." I couldn't help but laugh, obviously out of his goodness. He actually thinks I'm calculating him.
Since he proposes to introduce the AA system in the economic aspect, may I propose the adoption of the AA principle in housework and other areas as well? After all, if he doesn't agree to my proposal, I'm not obligated to agree to his AA system. Although there were some disagreements between us, thankfully there was no big fight. After reconsidering the issue of financial sharing, we finally came to an agreement that he would provide me with 2,500 yuan per month, while I would be responsible for the organization and management of my life, and other aspects would remain the same. Although the problem seemed to be solved, I still felt a little uncomfortable in my heart, as if I felt that I had suffered a little bit in this agreement.