Too many people are accustomed to prioritizing others to please others, whether it is in the school days, social training, or family environment, in order to be recognized and loved by others.
The people-pleasing personality often stems from inner fears and insecurities.
We always ignore our own needs and feelings, leading to inner exhaustion and dissatisfaction. So, how does a people-pleasing personality become strong?
First of all, realize that we don't please each other in a two-way way, you are blindly trying to get the satisfaction of the other person, against your own will, understand your own behavior patterns, recognize whether you are pleasing others based on fear or insecurity, only by being aware of your own problems, can you better solve it.
Second, learn to say "no" and be brave enough to say no to unreasonable requests or things that are beyond your means. Don't be afraid to offend others, those who understand will not offend, and those who can be offended are selfish and fail to satisfy them. Your heart must be strong enough to deal with any kind of bad relationship.
Third, learn to express your emotions and needs, don't suppress your feelings, learn to express your thoughts and needs honestly, put your feelings first, you can be more relaxed, and others can understand you better.
Fourth, build self-confidence, the pleasing personality often lacks self-confidence, thinks that they are not good enough, and needs to change their thinking and improve themselves in all aspects, including knowledge, skills, appearance, etc. Only a confident person can earn the respect and affection of others.
Fifth, learn to ask for help and support, don't bear all the pressure and difficulties alone, learn to ask others for help and support, often easy to not want to seek help from others, have too strong self-esteem, don't want to trouble others, afraid that others will look down on themselves, but most of the time the exchange of interests is the basic way of human affection, and people with affection and righteousness will not have prejudice and ugly psychology. Give others the opportunity to understand and help you.
Finally, keep in mind that becoming strong is not an overnight process, it requires continuous effort and perseverance, and in this process, there may be setbacks and difficulties, but as long as you don't give up, you will eventually become a strong person inside.
So how do you determine if a person is a people-pleaser?In general, the people-pleasing personality has the following characteristics:
1. Always strive to please others in order to gain recognition and affection;
2. When interacting with others, often suppress their own needs and feelings;
3. For the requirements of others, even if they are unwilling or beyond the scope of their ability, they will try their best to meet them
4. Lack of self-confidence, thinking that they are not good enough;
5. It is easy to feel guilty and self-blame;
6. When encountering difficulties or setbacks, they often choose to bear it alone and are unwilling to ask others for help.
If you find yourself with one or more of the above traits, then you may be a people-pleasing personality. Don't worry, like any other personality trait, the people-pleasing personality is not negative. It's just a part of who you are, and you can get stronger through self-awareness and self-improvement, and eventually overcome yourself and fall in love with yourself.