Many Chinese have a kind of "raising children to prevent old age" thinking, thinking that as long as they give birth to a son, then their old age will be settled, the more sons, then the more people will give you pension, and the burden of each son will be smaller. But is that really the case?I don't think so, in real life, we have also seen those parents who have had a lot of children, but in their old age, no one pays attention to them and ends up with no one to take care of them.
Why does this situation arise, because there are many children, there must be a situation where parents prefer one child, even if the parents themselves do not feel favoritial, in the eyes of the children, the parents obviously do not like me and prefer other people. Under the influence of this kind of thinking, it is easy for children to have an opinion about their parents. In their later years, these children will fight each other, they will blame each other, thinking that his parents are usually so good to him, and he should take on more obligations to provide for his parents. Therefore, in the end of the argument, everyone was angry in their hearts, and as a result, everyone ignored the old man.
If there is only one child, the situation will be relatively better, although the burden of a child is too heavy, but the parents have no choice but to support him, so he can't shirk it if he wants to. This is the same as the principle of "one monk has water to eat, but three monks have no water to eat".
Body. My grandmother is 78 years old this year, and because of her old age and osteoporosis, she had to be admitted to the hospital because of her advanced osteoporosis and suffered another lumbar vertebra fracture a few days ago. During the hospitalization, my grandmother could not go to the ground, so she could only lie on the hospital bed, and her urine and urine had to be solved in the bed, so there could be no shortage of people around her, and someone needed to take care of her.
My grandmother had quite a lot of children, three sons and two daughters. It stands to reason that since my grandmother was hospitalized this time, since she has so many children, someone must have taken care of her. But the result was that except for the two daughters who took turns to accompany them at night, and the third uncle who accompanied them for one night, no one came to accompany them, and the other two uncles just came to the hospital to take a look and left. The grandmother was very sad, she should have let her son and daughter-in-law take care of her son, but now she has let her daughter take care of her for a long time, and her daughter-in-law has not even come to see her.
I heard my grandmother say that this time I went to the pond to wash clothes, and suddenly I felt that my back hurt and I couldn't stand up. The doctor later told the family that the last time I had a cement injection for back pain, the cement injection was filled into the bone, which would make the bone very stiff, and once I did heavy physical work, it would be easy to compress the upper and lower bones, and the upper and lower bones would be crushed into bone cracks, and the reason this time was most likely caused by washing clothes in the pond.
At that time, after the uncle heard the doctor's statement, he immediately became angry with his grandmother, and he said, "Mom, can't you stop it?"After the last injection, the doctor had already said that you can't do heavy physical work, so you have to listen to it. Well, now it's like this, and I have to be hospitalized again. You are hospitalized and lie here enjoying yourself, but you are hurting us. Last time, everyone lost their effort to take care of you and choked everyone up, but this time it's the same situation. Can't you let us save our worries and live a few days in peace?You know, when you wash your clothes, you might as well plant them in a pond and drown, and once you are done, everyone will be clean in the future. ”
When my grandmother heard my uncle's words, she also lowered her head and didn't dare to say a word. In the evening, when my mother accompanied my grandmother, my grandmother told my mother about it, and my grandmother said: "Your eldest brother really doesn't have back pain when he stands and talks, and I shouldn't be able to do heavy work at such an age, but I don't work, can I?"I don't wash my clothes, can someone help me wash them?Washing clothes is heavy work, and that kind of land is even more heavy work. I planted the fields at home, and they complained about me when something happenedI didn't farm, and my eldest daughter-in-law and second daughter-in-law would talk sour outside, saying that I didn't do anything at home, and other people's mothers-in-law planted a garden of vegetables and kept sending them to my daughter-in-law's house. I can't help it, I can only plant the fields, and your second sister-in-law and sister-in-law eat less of my things every yearEvery time I go home, I take big bags and small bags, and I don't know how many chickens I eat all year round. Hey, now that something happened, I'm to blame, and the eldest daughter-in-law and second daughter-in-law don't come to see me. There are some things I can't say, and when I say them, I have endless grievances. ”
My mother was also very emotional and felt very sorry for my grandmother.
Second uncle, he doesn't speak as heavily and directly as his eldest uncle, but he is more ruthless in his actions. This time, everyone had to pay for my grandmother's hospitalization, but the second uncle said: "This time it is really difficult to get the money, I only have 1,000 yuan on my body, if I want to take it, he will go to the hospital to sell some blood and make up for it." ”
When a person in his 50s says something like this, don't say that he is despised by others, and outsiders are despised when he sees it. Later, the third uncle couldn't stand it, so he said to the second uncle: "If you don't want to come out, don't come out, don't find some crooked truth, I'll help you out of your share." As soon as the second uncle heard that the third uncle helped him out, he immediately changed a smile on his face, and he said: "How embarrassing is this, but don't worry, this money will not be missing from you, and the money for my mother's treatment will be shared equally among the three sons, which is also my obligation, and I will definitely pay you back when I have money in the future." ”
After so many years, the third uncle knows the temperament of the second uncle well, and the third uncle just waved his hand and said, "I don't expect you to pay it back, when have you ever had any money?"Every time something happens, you say you have no money, anyway, I know that you have no money all your life. The third uncle's words made the second uncle stand beside him stupidly and not squeak.
The third uncle is one of the three uncles who can be said to be reasonable, the eldest uncle and the second uncle have long been married and have children, but the third uncle has always been single. The reason why the third uncle did not have a family was that he had a disease, he had ankylosing spondylitis when he was very young, and the family conditions were poor at that time, and when he got this disease, all the money in the family was spent on the marriage of the eldest and second uncles, so there was no money to treat the third uncle.
Because it was not effective, the third uncle's condition developed very quickly, and he couldn't straighten his waist after a few years, so after a long time, no woman could look up to the third uncle, so the third uncle has been single. For the third uncle's illness, my grandparents have always felt ashamed of the third uncle, so if the third uncle did not fulfill the responsibility of providing for the elderly, it would be forgivable, because the conditions themselves are not good.
But among the three uncles, only the third uncle has accompanied him at night. But the third uncle himself has a job, and this job is still a relationship for people to find, because according to the physical condition of the third uncle, he bows at 90 degrees every day, and even wears clothes very hard, in fact, he is already equivalent to a disabled person
Therefore, this job is not easy to come by, so the third uncle can't easily fall out with the company, if he doesn't grasp this opportunity and loses his job, then the third uncle will not even be able to support himself in the future. The third uncle has already taken a leave to accompany his grandmother, so he really can't move in the follow-up. When my grandmother saw that my third uncle came to see him, she said to my third uncle very anxiously: "I'm very good, I don't need you to take care of me, hurry back to work, don't lose your job, if you lose your job, what will you do in the future?"”
Now, my grandmother is lying in the hospital, and the doctor said that I can't do surgery this time, because my grandmother's heart has not been very good recently, and the operation is too risky. I couldn't do surgery, so my grandmother could only lie in bed to recuperate, but she had to lie down for two months. Who will take care of her during these two months?Seeing the appearance of the eldest uncle and the second uncle, the third uncle couldn't get out, so he couldn't count on his son;That is counting on the daughter-in-law, it is even more impossible, now that they have not even been to the hospital, is it possible for them to serve day and night for two months?That's just daydreaming.
Now the only option left is to send my grandmother to a nursing home, but our nursing home costs 3,000 yuan a month, and we have to hire a special nurse to serve during these two months, and the nurse's money is also 150 per day. So it will cost 7,500 per month for each of these two months, which is a considerable amount, and the three uncles are still considering it. One of the second uncles said that if it really comes to that time, my mother and aunt will share that part of the money equally.