People seem to be a collection of contradictions, for example, in a relationship, the person you like is often what you can't get, and what you can easily get is always not pitied by yourself. There is a good saying: "What you can't get is always in turmoil", which vividly describes this mentality. What you can't get will always be attractive for a long time.
Why do people have such contradictory emotional outlooks?Why not cherish what you can have?There is a concept in psychology that can explain this phenomenon relatively well, and that is the "halo effect", also known as the halo effect. To put it simply: when you fall in love with someone, you give them the best qualities in the world. In your opinion, the other person is perfect, and "can only be seen from a distance, not blasphemed". The most typical example is: "In the eyes of the lover". Even in the eyes of the people around him, the other party is mediocre;But in your eyes, he is the best.
When you fall in love with someone, you will actually have an uncontrollable inferiority complex in your heart, and you will feel that the other person is good at everything and that the other person has perfect qualities. As a result, you are deeply attracted to the other party in the process of lowering your self-worth and raising the value of the other person.
People will always have a good impression of people who are better than themselves, and they will like and want to get closer. Whether it is a man or a woman, there is a desire to win, a desire to conquer, and a desire to challenge in their bones. As far as you are concerned, no matter how many people pursue you, it will not be easy to shake your mind, because the person who pursues you means that the availability is high, and the same is true of the person you can easily catch up. Feelings that are too easy to get are not challenging, so they are difficult to cherish.
People seem to be always pursuing better things, whether it is career, life or relationship, they all hope that they can get a better one. It can also be seen in intimate relationships that when the other party is worse than you in a certain aspect, you will always unconsciously be unacceptable, even if the other party is slightly more than you, it is not attractive;Those who are highly attractive are often the other party who have their own traits that they lack.
To put it another way: it's not so much that people are pursuing love, they always like the person who doesn't like them;Rather, man is pursuing what he lacks.