The writer Lemont said: Everything has an order, and if there is no order, it will be wrong.
It is true that in work, people are independent of each other, and everyone has their own little abacus.
When you get the order wrong and overestimate your relationships, you will shoot yourself in the foot, and troubles and problems will ensue.
Therefore,The interaction between people should also pay attention to a certain order.
So how to better figure out the order of appearance?Give these 5 tips a try.
First the villain, then the gentleman
In the workplace, we can't avoid collaborating with others.
In the process of cooperation, some people always save face, say some "sweet words", but avoid talking about possible problems, as if everything is under control.
But when there is a real problem, they will fight each other and no one will recognize each other.
As the saying goes: there are no eternal friends, there are no eternal enemies, only eternal interests, and human nature often cannot stand the test.
So, get along with anyone,In the face of the principle of interests, we must follow the principle of "villain first, then gentleman." ”
The villain first is the principle of interests before the gains and losses.
Before cooperation, we must put the distribution of responsibilities and the principle of interests in the open, and clearly explain that one is one and two is two.
After the gentleman, when talking about the distribution of interests, then talk about friendship and cooperation.
It is far wiser to say ugly things in front of you than to hide troubles behind you.
This not only paves the way for future work, but also allows everyone to have a psychological expectation of the worst possible outcome, so as not to mess up things in the future, everyone complains about each other, and makes both parties unhappy.
Screen first, then approach
No matter where we are or what position we hold, we must acknowledge one reality:
Although people are all equal in personality, they vary greatly in their abilities and achievements.
Some people are outstanding, others are mediocre.
As the saying goes: those who are close to Zhu are red, and those who are close to ink are black.
A good person has his own aura, which subtly influences the people around him who are close to him.
In the team, as a manager, you need to know this well.
When managing a build team or network, be sure to screen before you get closer.
This is not only a wise choice, but also a responsible attitude towards life for yourself and your team.
Let's say you're faced with the task of assembling a new project.
Among the many candidates, it is important to consider not only the professional skills of the team members, but also their values, teamwork, and growth potential.
Through a series of screening and evaluation, we can select excellent and like-minded team members, and continue to innovate and break through themselves in the process of doing.
And all of this is thanks to your wise screening and approach strategy.
When you choose those who have their own halos, their halos will shine on the whole team.
Therefore, in interpersonal communication, we must learn to screen first and then approach.
Appreciate first, then mix the circle
Writer Lian Yue once pointed out sharply:In the end, social interaction has to return to personal value.
However, many people realize this, but they don't want to face it head-on, and always want to rely on the strength of others to succeed.
They painstakingly manage all kinds of relationships and travel around all circles, but in the end, they painfully find that they have no value resources to use in this social game, and they are often closed.
Therefore, when your own value is not reflected, don't waste energy to squeeze the circle, no matter how hard you try to squeeze in, it will be in vain.
If the circle is low, you will go with the flow, and if the circle is high, you will be looked down upon, and if you can't do the equivalent exchange, you will be kicked out sooner or later.
Therefore, appreciate first, focus on improving yourself, make yourself more valuable, and then talk about mixing circles to attract the same connections.
Only in this way can you truly gain recognition and respect in social interactions.
When you are not strong enough, you want a small opportunity, and you don't have it, when you are good enough, everything you want will obediently take the initiative to come to you.
Understand first, then make friends
In the workplace, Xiao A received the enthusiastic help of a colleague, and the two met late, hit it off, and became "workplace girlfriends" who talked about everything.
At work, Xiao A innocently shared his private life and various views on leaders and colleagues, one by one, without the slightest reservation.
However, during a promotion, the two developed an adversarial relationship.
Her unintentional words in the past have naturally become a stumbling block to her promotion now.
As the saying goes, the water falls into the stone, and the people will see it for a long time.
In the workplace, we often hear, "It's okay, you can do it first!".But when the opportunity really comes, who can be willing to let go?
Time and interests, naturally, reveal the true face of each person.
Your shortcomings may become the joke of others after dinner, and your unintentional words may also become a sword that stabs you in the opposite direction.
Therefore, it is important to get to know the person well before deciding whether to make a heart-to-heart relationship.
There is room for talking, and there is a way out for doing things, which not only protects oneself, but also respects others.
At the same time, it is equally important to understand the environment in which the workplace works.
Only by having a deep understanding of the expectations of your superiors and colleagues, as well as the surrounding work environment, will you be able to do more with less.
Listen first, then speak
A child once asked curiously, "Why do the Buddha statues in the monastery have so big ears and so small mouths?"”
A wise man smiled and replied, "Because Buddhists know that listening is far more important than expressing." ”
When you think about it, there is a lot of truth in this.
In management work, we will also find that the more you talk, the more your subordinates will not listen, and even will be disgusted.
But when we are willing to calm down and be willing to be a foil listener, giving the other person more time to talk about their thoughts, we have invisibly won their favor.
Therefore,Listening is just as important as speaking in communication, listen to what you mean first, and then think about what you want to say.
Only in this way can you add glory to others and add color to yourself.
At the same time, we all know the power of language in communication, but don't forget itSuccess also has a mouth, defeat also has a mouth, and when the excitement comes, it often loses its proportion.
As the saying goes, "It only takes two or three years to learn to speak, but it takes a lifetime to learn to shut up."
Only if you listen to others well can you express yourself better.
Write at the end:
Whether speaking or doing things, all people's troubles originate from interpersonal relationships.
When we follow certain orders and principles, it is not difficult to find that things go smoothly and people are respected.