There is a question on Zhihu: "What is the root cause of a person's tired life?"”
Gao Zan replied: "It's not a matter of ability, it's not a matter of appearance, it's a lack of energy inside. ”
In the face of unsatisfactory life, people are accustomed to examining the inadequacy of external conditions, but ignore the importance of looking inward for energy.
David Hawkins, an American psychology professor, once proposed the "energy hierarchy theory".
The lower a person's energy level, the lower their mood will be, and the more likely they will be to fall into internal frictionPeople with a high energy level tend to be enthusiastic and optimistic.
People with different energy levels will also see the world from different angles, and thus go to diametrically opposite paths in life.
The year 2024 is coming soon, and if you want to live a relaxed and abundant life, you must quit these 3 low-energy behaviors.
*: Visual China.
Complain in times of hardship and complaint
Peddle cheap cognition
In the book "The World Without Complaining", there is such a story:
One day, the protagonists Roland and Lorraine go to school to pick up their daughter and meet a couple.
The children of the two families are of the same age, and the adults appreciate each other because of their similar parenting concepts and interests, so the two families often gather together.
At first the Rolanders liked the couple, but after a few months they began to refuse a four-person party.
It turned out that every time they had dinner, the wife would complain to Lorraine that her husband was lazy and didn't care about the family, and the husband complained to Rowland that his wife was too controlling and nagging.
They even deliberately led the Rolanders to find each other's shortcomings and provoke the relationship between Roland and Lorraine.
The Rolanders were so troubled by this that they found an excuse to cut ties with the couple.
The relationship between people often stems from mutual appreciation and ends with mutual complaint.
Lu Xun once said: "Often as soon as people complain, things will accelerate in the direction he complains." ”
Complaining about everything will only make life worse and disgusting.
Only with a positive and optimistic attitude can we overcome difficulties and enter a different world.
Brian, the male protagonist in the movie "Call Me First", has suffered from Tourette's syndrome since he was a child, which causes him to make strange noises involuntarily.
As a result, there was constant ridicule and questioning around him.
At school, the teacher thought he was playing a prank and almost kicked him out of the classroom;When he grew up, he wanted to become a teacher, but he repeatedly failed in interviews.
In the face of the mischief of fate, he was not depressed, let alone compromised.
When others called him stupid, he smiled and said, "Stupid people are stupid";Others thought he was stupid, but he still bravely seized the opportunity to show himself.
Later, he became a teacher, and with his unique teaching methods, he won the love of teachers and students.
Those who do not compromise with difficulties finally usher in the favor of fate.
Writer Maya Angelou once said, "If you don't like something, change it." If you can't change it, change your own attitude. ”
Everyone's life will be subject to sudden changes.
In the face of accidents, some people feel sorry for themselves and lie flat on the spot;Some people keep moving forward with hope.
But if you look closely, you will find that those who have the last laugh are always cheerful and open-minded, and they are not afraid of challenges.
Throughout life, only by quitting complaining and fighting against difficulties can we master our destiny and embrace a better future.
*: Visual China.
The heart is in the sky, and the feet are in the mud
Chase hypocrisy and decency
I once saw such a story:
There is an old turtle who loves to save face, and he likes to brag about his glorious deeds with the young turtles.
One day, in order to show off his tall image, the old turtle decided to climb a big rock to tell a story, but while climbing, he accidentally slipped off the stone and fell to the ground.
The baby turtles stepped forward to help the old turtle turn over.
But the old turtle said that he was strong and did not need help, and chased the young turtles away.
In the end, the old turtle could not turn over after tossing for a long time, and was picked up by passing fishermen and returned home.
There are many people in life who are like old turtles, because they can't put down their children, they miss the opportunity to "turn over".
If you pay too much attention to face, you will often be restricted everywhere and struggle in the quagmire of life all day long.
And only by daring to let go of false fame can we live our own lives and enjoy life.
Blogger @衣boss Ya once shared his experience:
She studied in a domestic "211" college and successfully got an offer from a real estate company when she was about to graduate.
But she chose to give up a high-paying and stable job and went to Shenzhen to sell mobile phones.
This decision has been questioned and criticized a lot.
Her parents accused her of giving up her prestigious school title to start a small business and not being decent enough;Friends complained that she had wasted good job opportunities and was not enterprising.
And her dream has never been to have a decent job, but to become an excellent entrepreneur and provide a platform for more young people with dreams to display their talents.
After several years of hard work, she relied on the accumulated funds and connections to set up her own company, and won back the respect and recognition of her parents and friends.
There is a good saying: "We used to look forward to the approval of the outside world so much, only to realize in the end that the world is our own and has nothing to do with others." ”
What can trap us is never the lack of ability and money, but the high wall called "face" in our hearts.
People who pay too much attention to face often wronged themselves in order to meet the expectations of others.
But life is not a show, and we don't need to put on a show to win a full house.
Life is short, instead of losing yourself in the pursuit of decency, it is better to shield others and focus on living your own life.
*: Visual China.
Raise people high, degrade people low
Addicted to stepping on each other
People who are addicted to stepping on each other may get a little pleasure from bullying the weak, but it is difficult to change the status quo.
There was such an infuriating thing at the entrance of a commercial business in Beijing
A group of delivery workers sat on the steps of the entrance of the mall to rest, their faces full of exhaustion.
A security guard at the mall came up to the delivery man and yelled at them to leave.
The delivery workers didn't want to have an argument, so they could only get up and leave, walk to the side and stand to rest.
Unexpectedly, the security guard took a pot of water to wet all the steps in front of the commercial mall, completely breaking the idea of the delivery staff continuing to sit down and rest.
The last straw that crushed ordinary people was not the hardships of life, nor the harshness of the boss, but the difficulties of ordinary people.
Stepping on each other, there is never a winning side. Only by achieving each other and being noble people can we achieve a win-win situation.
In 1933, Ba Jin and his friends founded the Literary Quarterly.
In the early days of the journal, it was in urgent need of a large number of excellent manuscripts to support, and Ba Jin was very anxious about it.
At this time, a friend suggested that he ask Bingxin for a manuscript.
At first, Ba Jin thought that Bingxin, who had already become famous, might refuse, but he didn't expect that after Bingxin understood Ba Jin's founding concept, he admired him very much, and even agreed to it, and the two became close friends.
In 1940, Bingxin was displaced by the war, and his health became worse and worse, and his life was very poor.
So, she asked Ba Jin to help publish "Bingxin's Collected Works" to earn living expenses.
Ba Jin immediately put down the things in her hand and personally helped her handle the publishing matters to help Bingxin tide over the difficulties.
The greatest wisdom in getting along with people is,"You made it to the top, I applaud you;I fell to the bottom, and you reached out."
Only by helping each other and achieving each other can we overcome difficulties and obstacles and go to a better tomorrow together.
*: Visual China.
Robin Sharma said, "Your energy level determines the quality of your life. ”
Energy may seem invisible, but it affects our lives all the time.
The journey of life is like sailing against the current, with constant winds and waves along the way.
In the face of wind and waves, the energy is too low, and you will only see your own disadvantages, lose the courage to fight against the wind and waves, and finally be swept by the waves at the bottom of the sea.
And the higher the energy, the more you can change without being surprised, meet the challenges ahead with a high-spirited attitude, and overturn the original chess game of fate.
In the second half of life, it is better to quit low-energy behaviors and change the way of life:
Quit complaining, take action, and find a way out.
Get rid of vanity, work hard, and take the road under your feet.
Let go of jealousy, improve yourself, and close the gap with others.
The New Year is approaching, may you and I be optimistic and open-minded, loyal to ourselves, kind to others, and have a brilliant life in the new journey.
Author: When I first met, my original intention did not change, and I lived up to the encounter.