Do you know why the divorce rate is getting higher and higher in society now, and most of the divorce is filed by women?Older leftover men say that it is because the cost of divorce for women is too low, but I think this statement is not comprehensive enough. Based on tens of thousands of real cases, I have summarized 3 reasons.
Listen to it, won't you?
The post-50s are poor and do not divorce, the post-60s are not divorced, and the post-70s quarrel and die without divorce. The post-80s will divorce if they can't get by, and the post-90s will divorce when they are angry.The older generation has no concept of divorce when marrying chickens and chickens, and we always find ways to fix what was broken in the past. Now that something is broken, just go and replace it, but does replacing it really solve the problem?
Now the life of some couples is not the same house. Different beds, different quilts in the same bed, back to back in the same bed.If you don't talk about it, you quarrel when you say it. Hold a mobile phone all day long but don't call**, and don't send messages.
The mobile phone is used for payment, the text message is used to receive verification codes, and the ** is used to order takeout. Leisure software is used to see other people's husbands and wives.
In particular, the cost of divorce for women is relatively low, and I may make many women unhappy when I say this.
In order to marry a daughter-in-law, it can be said that men have spent all the money of two generations, and some even go into debt for it.
And some women are very different, not only do they not have to spend money to get married, but they can also divide half of their property in divorce. Half for the house, half for the car, and half for the deposit.
Some people with bad intentions even regard divorce as their own compound.
Older leftover men feel that many people's marriages are barrier marriages now, which is more painful than makeshift marriages.
Let me tell you, everyone loves to brush ** now, what will big data recommend to you?
Recommendations to him are what he likes and what he is interested in. If you don't like it, you won't recommend it to you if you don't like it.
This means that for a long time, you can't see, you don't like and don't understand the information.
That's what the information cocoon says, and the two of you may belong to completely different information cocoons, so you're not communicating.
The live broadcast room of the Internet celebrity lady, in my short **, you can't find it. Because I don't pay attention and I'm not interested.
If both husband and wife don't ask, don't understand each other's preferences, don't communicate. Increase your understanding of the other person, or what has the other person done recently?
In your recent life, what do you encounter that you don't understand?
After a long time, they each live in their own world, and they still feel that the other party does not understand them.
For example, I had a counselor two days ago, my wife has been at home with children for a long time, and my husband is working outside the home under great pressure.
If you still ask me for money every day, can't you spend less?I'm so tired from work, and you'll be able to talk about it when you come back and rest for a while.
My wife said that if you don't have money, you don't have the ability, and you just don't get motivated. You see that you come back every day to play games, and when you go to the toilet for an hour, you don't work hard at all.
You don't work hard, can you make money?
Am I not tired when you are tired?
Therefore, when there is an information barrier between husband and wife, it is easy to turn into mutual accusations when communicating.
The best way to break down barriers is to let go of your preconceived notions of life. Let go of the original evaluation of the other party, and really have to understand and observe.
Even, to experience each other's encounters at home, outside the home. For example, when you are a mother with children on the weekend, you just have to go out for a walk. Take a walk and attend a study class or interest class. Engage with others and learn more about their lifestyles.
Couples with a particularly large gap in work really listen to each other talk about themselves after returning home. It's good to listen more, and you don't need to give advice to the other person right away, and you don't need to give him an evaluation.
Whether he makes sense or not, at least you'll know what he thinks while you're listening.
And then give some of your own thoughts, and he will slowly know what you think
Is there a kind of "barrier" marriage, which makes older leftover men instantly dull and boring in love?
Focus on love psychological analysis, emotional point of view argumentation, marital relationship repair.