My name is Li Fengying, I am 64 years old this year, my husband has long passed away, and the only queen Hui is married to Li Hong, and I have always lived with her. In order to help her take care of her 3-year-old granddaughter, Li Siwei, I decided to move to her house to live with them.
Mom, come and live in our house, you can help me take care of Siwei, she has been sticking to you the most recently. Li Hong said to me.
Well, it just so happens that I am reluctant to let Siwei sit in the kindergarten every day, and I can take her out to play on weekends. I readily agreed.
So, I packed some necessities and 32,980 yuan in cash, and took Li Hong's car to her house. Her husband Peng Li is self-employed, and he is usually too busy to take care of his children.
Li Hong's family lives in an old-fashioned two-bedroom apartment in the city, which is not large but warmly decorated. When I arrived, Siwei happily ran over and hugged my thigh: "Grandma is here!".Let's play puzzles together!”
I smiled and patted her little head: "Okay, we'll play in a while." ”
Li Hong was busy tidying up the house, and I asked Siwei to wash her hands, and then went into the kitchen to help prepare lunch.
Mom, you can live in Siwei's room, I nailed a curtain for you, it's better than sleeping on the sofa. Li Hong said while washing vegetables.
I set up the dining table and said with a smile, "It's okay, just sleep in your living room, just watch TV at night and then go to sleep." ”
Auntie, you've worked hard, I'm really sorry that we live in a small place and didn't spare a room for you. Peng Li was a little embarrassed.
I smiled heartily: "I'm here to help you take care of the children, I'm very happy to live with Siwei!."”
After lunch, Silvie took me by the hand and ran to her small room, taking out a box of 500 colorful puzzles. I sat with her on the rug, fighting and chatting.
Grandma, are you here to play with me?Siwei asked me with a tilt of her little head.
Siwei clapped her hands happily and laughed. She and I fiddled with the colorful puzzle pieces and chatted with her as we put them together. Her innocent language and silver bell-like laughter made me feel endless joy.
Auntie, don't do too much housework at home, and accompanying Siwei well is the biggest help to us. Li Hong instructed me.
I smiled and nodded, thinking to myself that I was old but full of energy, and that it would be easy for me to take care of Siwei and do some housework.
Mom, you've been working hard these days, I'm training early and returning late, it's up to you. She said with some reluctance.
I comforted her: "Just have fun at home with Siwei, you can go with confidence." ”
During the day, we were at home fiddling with Lego bricks and doing crafts, and occasionally went out to the supermarket to buy groceries or go for a run in the park. I taught her to read and sing, and told her childhood stories to make her happy, and she listened to them with relish. In the evening, we cook together, watch cartoons, and eat snacks with a bite, and have a good time.
I was overjoyed: "Of course, Siwei's child is so cute, I like her the most!."”
One day, Siwei begged me for snacks, and I was afraid that she would eat too many tooth decays, so she would be unhappy after only giving a small packet.
Grandma, I still want to eat!"She tugged at my clothes and coquettishly played a role.
I'm going to eat it!She started to lose her temper.
I said a little seriously, "You can't be willful, listen to grandma." ”
Siwei burst into tears. At this time, Li Hong came home and saw that the two of us were confronted, and she was a little annoyed: "Mom, you follow her when the child has a temper, what's the big deal!."”
I explained, "Hong'er, I'm not afraid of Siwei's tooth decay. ”
You're worrying too much!Li Hong said impatiently.
This little episode made me a little embarrassed and felt like I was meddling. But on second thought, it's normal to be strict with your granddaughter.
A few days later, I stumbled upon Li Hong who bought a few expensive clothes, and I had something to say in my heart.
Hong'er, have you been spending a lot of money lately?I asked.
Li Hong frowned and said: "Mom, I work so hard to earn money, whether to spend it or not, how to spend it is my freedom." I don't feel comfortable listening to you. ”
This incident makes our relationship a little delicate. Li Hong began to complain that I was too worried and too lenient. And I feel more and more that she is not persuasive enough, and her temper is a little violent.
It was a weekend, and Li Hong's family decided to drive to a rural town in the suburbs. I was going to stay at home, but Li Hongyang begged me to come, and joked, "So you can rest assured, there is a free nanny to watch the children". I hesitated and agreed.
However, I never imagined that this outing would completely change our relationship.
Just arrived in town and we had a picnic barbecue on a lakeside meadow. Siwei and I were playing in the water by the lake, and she was running around the water's edge excitedly, and I was afraid that she would fall into the water, so I followed her and watched over her. I didn't expect her to turn around, and I was unsteady on my feet, and I was about to fall into the water!
I was so embarrassed that I thought to myself that I had always been busy with her family, and when I rarely caused chaos, why did she say such a thing at such an important moment?
After that, we went to other attractions, but I wasn't so happy. On the way home in the evening, the light in the car was very dim, Li Hong accidentally ran a red light while driving, and almost hit another car!I couldn't help but let out a small scream of fear. Li Hong was very unhappy: "Mom, what is your name!."Scared Siwei into tears every minute!”
When I got home that night, I rarely locked the door and cried. It turns out that in my daughter's mind, I have gone from a caring grandmother who helps take care of my granddaughter to an old-fashioned, fastidious troublemaker.
Feng Ying, you can't blame Hong'er entirely, your two generations have different concepts and lifestyles. You adapt and learn to be friends with your daughter rather than an elder, and she will accept you. I wiped away my tears and said to myself.
Sure enough, in the next few weeks, the atmosphere in Li Hong's house became obviously a little deserted. Li Hong came back late and spoke to me very brieflySiwei wasn't as clingy to me as she used to be, and I took her to the supermarket and lost her temper.
Grandma, I'm going to eat candy!You go away!Siwei shook off my hand, and I looked at her helplessly.
Li Hong walked over and said unhappily: "Mom, if the child has an idea, you should satisfy her, she needs to be pampered now." ”
I was so sad that I couldn't say a word. I realized that the gap between me and them was getting deeper.
That night, after discussing with Peng Li, Li Hong told me about my decision to move out.
Mom, you have really wronged you by living with us, and it has also added a lot of burden to our family. After thinking about it, we still think it's more comfortable for you to move out and live on your own. Your house is also empty and unoccupied, so you can go back and clean it often. Li Hong seemed to have made up her mind.
I'm sorry, Mom!But both of us think so. Li Hong said undoubtedly.
I broke down and cried, but Li Hong stood up and said that I was going to be busy. I couldn't accept the reality, and God was heartbroken. It turned out that I was kicked out of my daughter's house after all.
For the next few days, I shrunk in the living room and wept all day, Li Hong and Peng Li ignored me and were busy with their own business. Siwei also seemed to feel the strangeness of the atmosphere, and stopped sticking to me to play.
I called my girlfriends and neighbors and friends to tell me about it, and they all felt very sorry for me: "We all know that Feng Ying has always had a good relationship with her son-in-law and daughter, but I didn't expect them to treat you like this!."”
Feng Ying, don't be too sad. Nowadays, many people in society throw the elderly into nursing homes for the sake of face, and your daughter still takes you back to her hometown and doesn't leave you homeless. "Gao Yan next door comforted me.
I was silent, my heart like a knife. No one can understand the pain of being trampled on like this for more than ten years.
More than a month later, I dragged my tired body and a few suitcases into Li Hong's car. Li Hong's face was expressionless, Siwei was not interested, and only Peng Li was a little ashamed to help me carry my luggage into the car.
I looked back at this small home where I had lived for more than a month, and it contained so many hopes and expectations. When I think about it, all the good things have come to naught, and my heart is like falling into an ice cellar.
As the car drove out of the city, I couldn't help but look back at the tall buildings, and tears welled up in my eyes again. I knew I might never come back to this roof. Along the way, Li Hong and I were silent and tense.
When I arrived at my hometown's house, Li Hong and Peng Li hurriedly helped me carry my luggage and hurried back to the city. I stood in the doorway and watched their taillights disappear into the distance, life had never been so hopeless.
It turned out that after all, I was emptied of all my love and decades of emotional investment, and I fell to pieces in front of my daughter's house.
I went back alone to the deserted old house, which was a little old, with peeling walls, dusty furniture, and a strange smell everywhere. I glanced at the once warm little world, and I couldn't hold back my tears anymore, and I cried bitterly.
Feng Ying, cheer up!Life is still alive, hope never dies!I poured myself a glass of water with trembling hands and drank it all. Recalling Li Hong's innocent smiling face when she was a child, my heart ached.
Hong'er, mom is sorry for you, it's me who didn't keep up with the times and became a burden to you. Don't blame Mom, Mom really loves you very much!I wiped away my tears with a handkerchief and muttered to myself.
I called my girlfriends and neighbors about it, and they felt unworthy for me. "Feng Ying, children are by nature, don't take it too seriously. Just have our old guys with you!”
So in the company of my friends, I gradually came out of the shadow of sadness. During the day, I clean my room at home alone, and at night I get together with my friends to play mahjong, sing and dance. Although the unfilial piety of my children makes me sad, there are still these close friends who are close to each other, and life is quite happy.
Two months have passed in the blink of an eye. One day, I suddenly received a ** from Li Hong, saying that she decided to take me back to the city to live after discussing with Peng Li, and apologized to me for what happened before.
Mom, we really didn't think it through at the time, so you might as well move back and live with us. We miss you so much. Li Hong's tone was unprecedentedly sincere and soft.
I was skeptical, and I had mixed feelings. I still love my daughter dearly, and I miss the lovely Siwei. However, the pain of the past is not immediately relievable.
Daughter, mom knows you mean well. Everything that happened in the meantime made us all need time to think. When mom figures it out, she'll get in touch with you. I said firmly and gently.
I thought about it again and again, and finally mustered up the courage to step into Li Hong's house again. The moment I opened the door, I saw again this small home that had brought me so much warmth and beauty, but also made me experience great pain.
Mom!Li Hong excitedly opened her arms and hugged me, and I gently hugged her back.
Grandma!Siwei ran over happily, and I was moved to pick up this cute little life.
Auntie, welcome, welcome!Peng Li graciously took my luggage.
I took a deep breath and tried to squeeze out a smile. This home, for me, is a place of love and hate. I had to face and accept everything in the past before I could really let go of my knots and start over.