Uncle Zhang, who is now old this year, works in a state-owned enterprise as a technician, has two children who have graduated from college, and he and his wife have long since retired at home. It can be said that Uncle Zhang has successfully entered middle age and ushered in the most comfortable stage of his life.
However, in the past year, Uncle Zhang has been worried a lot - his eldest son divorced his wife after getting married and having children, and he and his wife had to help take care of their grandchildren;The second son had difficulties in capital turnover in the early days of the business, and repeatedly asked them for money. Uncle Zhang and his wife are not only under great financial pressure, but they are often entangled in their son's family trivialities, and the mental pressure can be imagined.
Through reflection and communication, Uncle Zhang summed up two "lifelong traps" in his opinion - as long as middle-aged people want to be comfortable for the rest of their lives, they must exit as soon as possible.
The first circle: the parent group
Uncle Zhang found that since joining his parents' WeChat group, their lives have not been peaceful. The daughter-in-law is sick and asks him to take his grandson;My son can't go home after overtime, so I want him to pick him upYou have to find them for everything, big or small. Mrs. Uncle Zhang complained: "Obviously they are all adults, why are they still like children, always relying on their parents?"”
In fact, many middle-aged people are deeply trapped in this "parental trap" - while feeling happy that their children grow up and independent, they subconsciously treat them as children. Mrs. Zhang is right when she says that since the child has a family, parents should let them learn to be independent and responsible. If middle-aged people want to be idle for the rest of their lives, the parent group may be the first circle that needs to be withdrawn.
The second circle: the group of relatives
Uncle Zhang found that in addition to the parents, the relatives group has also become another annoyance in his life. Trivial tasks such as introducing your niece, running errands for your cousin, and attending your cousin's banquet fill the schedule. What's worse is that some relatives have repeatedly borrowed money from them under the guise of "family". Mrs. Uncle Zhang reminded her again and again, but it was useless, Uncle Zhang is really a heart-to-heart character.
In fact, the family affection that blood is thicker than water does not mean that we must give unconditionally. After middle age, most people want to live a stable life. Therefore, instead of being delayed by unreasonable relatives, it is better to withdraw from some relatives as soon as possible to ensure your mental peace.
Uncle Zhang is an ordinary person around us, but his feelings represent the true thoughts of many middle-aged people - after accumulating a certain amount of financial resources, everyone is more eager for peace and ease in life, and does not want to break their hearts for others all day long. Therefore, if you want to live comfortably after middle age, it is best to quit the "parental trap" and "relative trap" as soon as possible, so that the child can take responsibility independently and let the relatives learn to support themselves. In this way, the rest of your life can be truly rich and happy.