Photography丨Xie Shenggang.
Gentle upbringing
Edited by Yang Ying read丨Zhang Yiwen.
Hanjun is in the third grade of elementary school, and her mother is doing freelance work at home. Every day after coming home from school, Hanjun is the most relaxed time, chatting with his mother, eating snacks made by his mother, and watching TV for a while, and then going to do homework after dinner.
Hanjun's mother felt that her child was in school for a day, and she was not in a hurry to do her homework when she came back, so she let the child relax and relax first.
On this day, Hanjun was watching TV happily, and his father came back from work. As soon as he saw Hanjun watching TV, his father immediately shouted, "Is your homework finished?"When I came back, I just knew how to watch TV. ”
Hanjun was very afraid of his father's tantrum, so he immediately turned off the TV and ran to the room.
The mother, who was cooking in the kitchen, couldn't help but defend the child, but the father who was still angry quarreled with the mother again.
The originally warm and harmonious home suddenly turned into a battlefield filled with gunsmoke.
The child hides in the room in fear, the mother cries quietly in the kitchen, and the father sits on the sofa in a huff.
Hanjun's father is not like this every time he comes back from work, sometimes he will watch TV with his children for a while, and the father and son will chat happily for a while.
Recently, Hanjun's father has not been working well, and he is under a lot of pressure at work, and he is prone to tantrums when he gets home.
Some parents often unconsciously bring home the tiredness, hardship, and resentment they have suffered outside, and bring their bad temper to their family members.
The contagion of emotions is like a nuclear bomb, good emotions will produce a huge positive energy field, while negative emotions will form a negative energy field.
Especially children, sensitive and simple, they are most infected by the emotions of the people closest to them, if the family is in a bad mood, then this bad mood will also directly affect the child's physical and mental development.
Don't take the bad mood home with you
Some parents do not manage their emotions well, and often unconsciously bring home negative emotions in work and life, and sometimes they scatter fire on their children even though it is not their own problem.
When parents intentionally or unintentionally make fun of their children, the child's first reaction is inexplicable, which is in strong contrast with the parents' usual care for the child, making the child feel extremely aggrieved and painful.
There is a saying that the highest behavior of emotional intelligence is to be able to maintain respect and patience with the most familiar and kind people. Properly managing one's emotions and not letting the cannonfire of one's temper bombard the dearest ones is also a kind of cultivation in life.
Nine-year-old Evergreen has a top academic performance, a lively and cheerful personality, and often helps his classmates.
When the teacher asked him why he was so optimistic, he said, "It's mainly due to Dad's role model." I've often heard from my table mates that his dad would lose his temper when he came home. My dad was not like that, no matter how bad he was at work, he would always be very optimistic about my mom and me, and never lost his temper with us. ”
In this regard, Changqing's father said his experience:
I attach great importance to the harmonious atmosphere of the family. Actually, I sometimes encounter some unhappy things during work, but I always give myself some positive cues. For example, before I enter the house, I will say to myself, work is work, home is home, and since I am home, I can't bring home the bad mood at work. In addition, I have a ** for my whole family hanging in my car, and every day when I drive home, I look at this **. That's how I remind myself not to bring my bad temper home. ”
Anchor |Zhang Yiwen's works are selected from "Gentle Upbringing".
"Haibo Night Reading" is looking forward to your works, if you have an article or ** that you want to share, please submit your manuscript to the mailbox hbyedu@163com, we are here for you.
**: Haibo TVEditors: Liu Yan, Duan Shengqi.
