LoveIt is blind, especially for women who are easily susceptibleLoveGet carried away and sacrifice anything for the sake of your lover. However, this over-investmentLoveIt often ends in disappointment. It's like a rubber band, if you put in too much and pull it too tightly, it will break sooner or later. InLoveNot only do you need strong love, but you also need to give each other enough space. Want to be inLoveThe best way to firmly occupy a man's heart and win is to follow two principles: not taking the initiative to help men pay and not taking the initiative to help men clean up the mess.
Today's women advocate independence and freedom, and pursueEquality between men and womenThey believe that what men can do, women can do too. Therefore, inLoveIn the pursuit of fairness, women will compete to pay for men, including eating. The small matter of paying for food may seem insignificant, but sometimes it can be influencedLoveof the direction. In the beginningIn loveOr the relationship is not yet determined, and both parties are getting to know each other and testing each other. At this time, the woman's behavior will make the first impression on the man and it will be difficult to change. Imagine that after a harmonious dinner, when the man is ready to pay, the woman also takes out her wallet, and the two start arguing, and the original romantic atmosphere is suddenly shattered.
Or, when the man was about to pay, the waiter told him that the lady had already paid, and the man could only take back his phone in embarrassment, and the originally beautiful atmosphere became delicate. Paying the bill is an opportunity for men to show themselves, and women rush to pay at this time, actually depriving men of the stage to show themselves. For some thoughtful men, it is an act of refusal, indicating that the woman has no interest in him and does not want to take advantage of him. Or it means that the woman has not opened up to him and treats him as an outsider, so she doesn't want to spend his money and doesn't want him to pay. A woman's starting point is good, and she wants to be thereLovePursuing equality, not relying on men, not taking advantage of men, but can choose some gentler ways to express it.
For example, giving a man a small gift of considerable value, inviting a man to his home, cooking for him, etc. In this way, he not only returned the favor of this meal, but also expressed his feelings to the man. Compared with rushing to pay the bill, this roundabout way can better promote the relationship between the two parties. Equality between men and womenIt's not about competing over the bill, but the equality of the heart is more important than the equality of money.
InLoveThere is a group of women who always pay too much attention to men, take men too seriously, and rush to solve problems for them. When men encounter difficulties, they are more anxious than the men themselves, and they go all out to help solve the problem. This dedication may gain the man's gratitude in the short term, but in the long run, it will do more harm than good to the relationship between the two. There is a concept in psychology called the "role effect", which means that when a person plays a certain role, others will change their perception of him. InIn love, two people should be equal partners, but if women are Xi to helping men deal with problems, then in men's hearts, women's roles will change, no longer equal partners, but similar to the role of "elders".
At this time, the man's affection for the woman is no moreLove, but more respect and gratitude. The relationship between the two gradually deteriorated. People are inert, and once a man finds out that a woman is willing to settle the mess for him, he will behave more unscrupulously and without fear. Some truths can only be learned after experiencing setbacks. If a woman blindly takes on the responsibilities of a man, she will not end up with a reliable partner, but a child who will never mature. It's the same for anyone, being too nice to one person will only increase the probability of not being cherished. Sometimes, keeping a moderate distance is not indifference, but freshnessLoveThe secret.
Don't worry that being too passive will make men lose interest in you, in fact, on the contrary, men always like elusive women, and the harder they are, the easier it is to stimulate their inner desire to conquer and challenge. On the contrary, things that are too easy to get are often overlooked. Remember, the best way for a woman to be loved is not to please a man, but to please herself. You are only worthy of being loved if you learn to love yourself.
To sum up, through two principles: not taking the initiative to help men pay and not taking the initiative to help men clean up the mess, women can beLoveto maintain their independence and charm. This does not mean that women should passively sit idly by, but learn to balance their efforts and retain a certain amount of personal space, letLoveKeep it fresh and balanced. When a woman learns to love herself and does not do anything for a man at will, she can truly get the value of being loved.