In our society, there are too many people who "live for tomorrow and abandon today", and they often refuse to fall in love.
I don't want to be in a relationship at all, it's such a waste of time." Sometimes you meet such people. One person cheers for the graduate school entrance examination This kind of person is different from the person who asks "Do you have to be in love".
The latter are better because they leave their love in the realm of choice. But the former do not put love in the scope of choice, they see love as something that should be denied and avoided.
Why do they deny love?
In my opinion, the most important reasons are:
Falling in love forces us to live "now" and "here", and people avoid the present under the discipline of traditional society and culture.
Their motto is "I want to focus on improving myself, so that I will naturally meet better people".
For example, during the repetition period, a boy is in serious trouble and likes the girl in the next class. More seriously, the girl accepted his confession.
They have lunch together, watch movies on weekends, and enjoy the daily routine of a couple. But their love affair didn't last.
Soon after, the boy told the girl, "Now is not the time," and they broke up.
The boy bluntly said: "I won't fall in love until I go to college", thus denying love.
Does this only happen in high school?Definitely not, it's not easy in high school, it's not easy in college, it's not easy after work, our culture, forces us to delay gratification and live for the future, not for the present.
Falling in love is different from this culture of delayed gratification, and it strongly forces us to live "now" and "here".
What's amazing about it is that once you fall in love, worries about the future disappear in an instant.
When I was in college, I skipped a professional class that I couldn't miss to see my lover, I ran out of my savings to buy a gift for my beloved, and I ended up hungry.
All of this, in the eyes of those who always look only at the future, sacrificing today and the present, is irresponsible and irrational.
Society always demands that we live rationally and responsibly.
What is rational and responsible?Surely sacrifice the life of today and now for the sake of tomorrow and the future.
This culture of preparing for a rainy day is deeply rooted in the marrow, so we are always worried about tomorrow.
Whether it's money, education, fame, or power, isn't sacrificing today to achieve a certain goal the right way of life for us to think it is?
Love is "now" and "here", and it only allows us to live in the here and now.
People who are in love will not bury their heads in hard studies in high school, but will only look at their beloved;College students in love easily skip class. Even people who are struggling to earn money may take out their savings to travel because they are in love.
Love is a terrible thing. This is especially true for those who have been sacrificing today and present, living for tomorrow and the future, because once in love, one has to live today and now.
People who deny love are afraid. They have always felt emotionally stable by preparing for the future and sacrificing the present, but once they fall in love, that emotional stability immediately collapses.
Because love forces us to live "now" and "here" with intense pressure.
So those people, in the end, will deny love, for that internalized sense of emotional stability, which is the kind of weirdness that is felt at the expense of today's lifeA sense of self-exploitation
Only people who realize that happiness does not lie in the future but in the present will affirm love and start falling in love?Or is it because you fell in love with someone and started falling in love, that you realized that happiness is not tomorrow but today?
In either case, love is not an object of negation and rejection, but an object of affirmation and hope.
If you love life, being in love is never an experience to avoid. Happiness is not somewhere tomorrow and the future, it is "now" and "here".