A few days ago, I went on a business trip to the south and chatted with a little girlfriend on the train who I hadn't been in touch with for a long time. She was divorced. Not unusually, divorce is now about to become a high probability event. In fact, love, including marriage, always belongs to the bystander, who is not only a person who claims to be an emotional expert, but also a "stupid" group once he falls into the emotional whirlpool. Lose your cool, be in "this mountain", don't die, wait for hot pot?!
Let's have some emotional experience below, and watch it as a dog's blood rice seasoning!
People who are close to us, whether friends, family, or colleagues, are more likely to be our future love partners. The most ironic proof is that husbands and wives like to cheat the most are female and male girlfriends. It's because your friends tend to agree with your aesthetic because they tend to agree with your aesthetics, so it's not unusual for the people you choose to like.
In terms of personality, hobbies, values, etc., people are more inclined to build relationships with people who are similar to themselves.
Passion can promote the establishment of intimacy, and the development of intimacy will also enhance the burning of passion.
Free love is when two people come together naturally without any pressure or constraints. This style of love focuses more on the inner qualities and mutual understanding of both parties, so it is more likely to form a stable and long-lasting relationship. Of course, firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar, tea, and babies are enough to defeat any pure feelings, whether love or friendship.
When people fall in love, they are more likely to believe in fate and fate, thinking that the relationship is predestined.
Men pay more attention to their image and status, while women pay more attention to the stability and security of their relationships. So, many times, men's fragile self-esteem often misunderstands women's kindness.
Commitment is one of the most important elements in love, it can make both parties trust each other more, and at the same time, it can also enhance the stability and durability of love. However, promises can only be used as icing on the cake, and if you are desperately serious, you will most likely lose. Do it and cherish it.
Communication can solve the contradictions and problems between the two parties, and at the same time, it can also promote mutual understanding and trust. Communication is the only way to work, and if that doesn't work and doesn't work all the time, it's best to prepare for the worst.
Being too dependent on the other person can cause the relationship to become heavy and suffocating, while being too independent can make the other person feel neglected and unwanted. This is the most core technology in an emotional relationship. If you don't have a tacit understanding with each other, it's hard to do that. In fact, it is not just a question of who gives more and who is at a disadvantage, but whether you are comfortable with each other in this relationship. Uncomfortable emotions always don't last long, no matter how reluctant they are.
Sexual attraction can enhance the intimacy and passion of both parties, and it is also one of the important factors in maintaining love. This is important. Of course, for most people, asexual platonic relationships (heterosexuals are basically women's requests, while homosexuals are more common) are not in the scope of discussion.
In love, we can't blindly give or blindly accept each other's contributions, but need mutual understanding and support so that both parties can get something in return. In fact, everything needs to be exchanged for value, and even if it is unequal, it must be compensated by other parties. Many people don't like the theory of "objectification of man", but the theory of value exchange, which is one of the most important core foundations in economics, is also perfectly appropriate for people. Those who pay attention to selfless dedication also need to be rewarded, that is, their own recognition, or the recognition of others, which belongs to a higher level of return and balance. Love, on the other hand, is even more so. If you can't get it, let it go, or more extremely, open relationships. Such was the relationship between Sartre and DeBova. There is a deep love between them, but they can't imprison their admiration for the talent of the opposite sex, so they choose an open relationship.
Similar values and outlooks on life can help both parties understand each other better, and at the same time, it can also enhance mutual trust and understanding. The mutual recognition of the three views is so important!There can be differences between each other and even that, which will produce better results, but if the three views are different, there is no basis for communication at all, and talking about chickens and ducks is tantamount to disaster.
Family background and educational experience can reflect a person's character and values, and therefore can also influence mutual attraction and understanding between the two parties. The ancestors believed in a practical philosophy. In the university of society, the ancestors have come up with golden rules. This is especially true for door-to-door pairs. Because, the marriage of two people is not just a matter of two people. You will love each other very much, but the family behind you, even the clan, will not love each other. Isn't that a big problem?There was a TV series "Chinese-style Marriage" starring Chen Daoming before, which was about this profound philosophical issue of life.
A sense of humor and hobbies can make both parties more relaxed and at ease, while also promoting communication and understanding. I've seen two stuffy gourds who can still respect each other like guests, but there are too few!Basically, the complementary personalities go a little further. However, being too poor will backfire.
A crisis of trust in love is one of the common challenges. Trust is one of the most important factors in maintaining love, but trust crisis is also one of the common challenges. When there is a crisis of confidence, both sides need to communicate and support each other to rebuild trust.
A breakup in love doesn't have to end in failure. Sometimes a breakup may be due to some problems or conflicts between the two parties, but this does not necessarily mean that it will end in failure. After the breakup, both parties can reflect and Xi from each other to lay a better foundation for future relationships.
To put it bluntly, the previous marriage is the tuition fee for the next paragraph. The premise is, whether you can still afford it. My first sisters, there is an essential problem in knowing people, three relationships, the first is a man's domestic violence, the second is a man's cheating, and the third is a **. Now that I want to get married again, I vaguely persuaded her, "Are you really ready to be hurt again?"”