The concept of "hateful period" may be a relatively unfamiliar term for many parents. It usually appears between the ages of 12 and 14 in children, in the early stages of adolescence. Unlike the well-known "rebellious period", children in the "hateful period" are not a full-blown rebellion against social norms. Their rebellious behavior is more directed at their parents and is able to maintain a friendly attitude towards others around them. This phenomenon often makes parents feel heartbroken and helpless, however, as long as they understand and deal with it correctly, the "hatred period" can be safely passed. As long as parents use the right tricks, they can let their children successfully pass the "hatred period". 
1. Avoid excessive monitoring and give children appropriate free space
During the "hateful period", children are going through the transition from childhood to adolescence, and they begin to think independently and explore their own identity and values. Children at this stage especially need a certain amount of freedom and private space. If parents monitor their children excessively, such as frequently checking their children's rooms, eavesdropping**, or asking their children's whereabouts all the time, it is easy to arouse children's disgust and hostility. The right thing to do is to build trust and an open family atmosphere. Parents should trust their children in their ability to handle their own affairs, while also letting them know that the door to the house is always open if they need help. By respecting their child's privacy and giving them the right amount of freedom, parents are able to reduce conflict with their children while also helping to foster their children's independence and responsibility. 
2. Avoid arranging everything, discipline everywhere, and learn to let go appropriatelyChildren in the "hateful period" are often dissatisfied with excessive parental interference. If parents Xi used to arranging everything for their children, such as academic Xi plans, extracurricular activities and even social circles. Children may feel that their autonomy is being taken away and become hostile to their parents. At this stage, parents need to learn to let go appropriately. Trust your child's ability to make decisions on their own and learn from Xi mistakes. When a child is struggling, the role of parents should be that of a guide and supporter, not an all-powerful arranger. By encouraging their children to take ownership of their problems and take responsibility, parents are able to help them build self-confidence and independent thinking. 
3. Abandon "countering violence with violence" and resolve conflicts with love and communicationFaced with the provocation and hostility of their children during the "hateful period", the first reaction of many parents may be anger and counterattack. However, the practice of "countering violence with violence" usually only exacerbates family conflicts and further strains the parent-child relationship. Neither verbal nor physical violence is a good way to solve the problem. Instead, parents should try to defuse conflict with love and communication. When a child is emotional or speaks violently, parents should first stay calm and avoid being driven by their child's emotions. Then, try to understand your child's feelings and needs and express your opinions and expectations in a calm tone. Parents should try to avoid using accusatory, sarcastic, or threatening language during communication, which can make children feel more hostile. If the conflict cannot be resolved immediately, parents can suggest that both parties calm down for a while and then continue the discussion in a more peaceful atmosphere.
Xiaoxiao said:
Although the "hateful period" is a challenging stage in a child's development, it can be safely passed as long as parents understand and deal with it in the right way. With the right approach, parents can not only reduce direct conflict with their children, but also promote their children's healthy growth and independent development. In this process, parents should also remember to pay attention to their own emotional needs and mental health, because parental happiness and satisfaction are equally important on the road to raising children.