Marriage is one of the most important relationships in life, but it is also one of the most problematic. Many couples go through some difficult times in their marriage, and if they are not handled properly, it can easily lead to the breakdown of the marriage. This article will cover three of the hardest periods in a marriage and how to deal with them.
The first period is the newlywed. The newlywed period usually refers to the first few years of marriage, when couples need to adjust to their new lifestyles and roles, as well as build trust and communication with each other. During this period, there may be conflicts and frictions between the husband and wife due to trivial matters in life, personality incompatibility and other issues.
Couples may have conflicts due to the unclear division of household chores. One partner may feel that they are doing more chores, while the other party feels that they are working harder and should do less chores. In this case, the couple needs to sit down and communicate well, clarify the division of household chores, and understand and support each other. Couples may also have conflicts due to personality disagreements. One side may be more introverted and prefer to be quiet, while the other side is more extroverted and likes to be boisterous.
In order to cope with the conflicts and frictions of the newlyweds, couples need to maintain good communication and understanding, respect each other's feelings and needs, and also learn to be tolerant and compromise. For example, couples can sit down regularly to communicate, share each other's thoughts and feelings, and learn to listen to each other's opinions and suggestions. At the same time, couples also need to learn to tolerate each other's shortcomings and shortcomings, and try not to quarrel over trivial matters.
Case 1: Xiao Li and Xiao Zhang are a newlywed couple who have encountered a lot of problems during their newlywed period. They find that each other's living habits and personalities are very different, and they often quarrel over small things. One night, they quarreled again over the division of household chores.
Xiao Li: "Why do I wash the dishes every time?" Can't you help me share the burden? ”
Xiao Zhang: "I've also worked all day, I'm very tired, why can't you understand me?" ”
Xiao Li: "Then we can take turns, isn't that fair?" ”
Xiao Zhang: "Okay, then let's take turns." ”
Li and Zhang realized that they needed to communicate and compromise better in order to solve life's small problems. They begin to develop a household chore schedule and help and support each other when it comes to household chores. In the end, they managed to survive the newlywed period and build a happy family.
Case 2: Xiao Wang and Xiao Zhao are a newlywed couple who are experiencing financial difficulties during their newlywed period. Their income is not high, but the cost of living is high, and they often quarrel over money. One night, they quarreled again over the issue.
Xiao Wang: "Our income is not enough at all, and we have to repay the mortgage and car loan every month, what should we do?" ”
Xiao Zhao: "I'm also thinking of a way, we can save some expenses, or find a part-time job." ”
Xiao Wang: "But none of this can solve the fundamental problem, our income is still too low." ”
Xiao Zhao: "Then we can work together to develop a financial plan to see what we can save and what we can increase our income." ”
Xiao Wang and Xiao Zhao realized that they needed to face the financial difficulties together and make a reasonable financial plan. They started saving money and got a part-time job together. In the end, they managed to survive the newlywed period and build a stable and happy family.
The second period is after the birth of the child. The birth of a child will bring a lot of changes to both spouses, including lifestyle, sharing of responsibilities, time allocation, etc. During this period, couples may experience conflicts and stress over the care of their children, and may also be emotionally distant due to a lack of communication and understanding.
Couples may have conflicts over the care of their children. One partner may feel that they are taking care of their children more, while the other partner may feel that they are working harder and should take care of their children less. Couples may also be emotionally distant due to a lack of communication and understanding. One partner may neglect the feelings and needs of the other parent because of childcare, while the other parent may not have the time and energy to care for the other parent due to work pressure.
In order to cope with the challenges of the child's birth, couples need to share the responsibility of caring for the child, maintain good communication and understanding, and also need to give each other some personal space and time. For example, couples can set a schedule that clarifies their responsibilities for the care of their children and supports and cooperates with each other. At the same time, couples also need to find time to care for each other, share each other's thoughts and feelings, and strengthen their relationship with each other.
Case 1: Xiao Liu and Xiao Chen are a husband and wife, and after their child was born, they encountered a lot of problems. They find that their time and energy are occupied by their children and they have no time and energy to take care of each other. One night, they were resting on the couch after taking care of the children.
Xiao Liu: "We haven't had time together lately, and I feel like the distance between us is getting farther and farther away. ”
Xiao Chen: "Yes, we are all too busy to take care of ourselves. ”
Xiao Liu: "Then we can find some time for the nanny to take care of the children, and we can go out on a date, or do something we like together." ”
Xiao Chen: "Okay, then let's find a weekend to go out on a date." ”
Xiao Liu and Xiao Chen realized that they needed to give each other some time and space in order to maintain their relationship with each other. They start to make a schedule and find some time each week to go out on dates or do something they enjoy together. Eventually, they managed to survive the post-birth period and build a harmonious and happy family.
Case 2: Xiao Zhang and Xiao Li are a husband and wife, and after their child was born, they encountered professional problems. They find themselves in a big conflict between their working hours and their children's care time, and they often quarrel over work issues. One night, they were discussing work.
Xiao Zhang: "I'm too busy at work, I often have to work overtime, and I don't have time to take care of my children. ”
Xiao Li: "Me too, I'm also very busy with work, and I often have to travel. ”
Xiao Zhang: "Then we can consider changing jobs, or adjusting working hours to take better care of our children." ”
Xiao Li: "Okay, then let's see if there is a suitable job together." ”
Zhang and Li realized that they needed to balance work and family better in order to take better care of their children. They start looking for better job opportunities, or adjust their working hours. Eventually, they managed to survive the post-birth period and build a stable and happy family.
The third period is middle age. The middle age period usually refers to the period between the ages of 40 and 50, when couples may face occupational pressures, family pressures, physical health problems, etc. During this period, the couple may have conflicts and friction due to the pressures of life, and at the same time, they may also be emotionally distant due to a lack of common interests and hobbies.
Couples may have conflicts due to professional pressures. One partner may have a stressful job and need more time and energy to cope with the work, while the other party may feel frustrated and lost because the work is not going well. Couples may also become emotionally distant due to a lack of shared interests and hobbies. One party may prefer to travel, while the other party prefers to stay at home.
In order to cope with the challenges of middle age, couples need to face the pressures of life together, maintain good communication and understanding, and also need to find some common interests and hobbies to enhance their relationship with each other. For example, couples can participate in interest classes or social activities together to explore new areas and hobbies together. At the same time, couples also need to pay attention to each other's physical health, participate in sports or healthy activities together, and enhance physical fitness.
Case 1: Xiao Zhao and Xiao Qian are a husband and wife, and they encountered a lot of problems in middle age. They have a lot of work pressure and some problems with their physical health, and often quarrel over these issues. One night, they were discussing physical health.
Xiao Zhao: "Recently, I feel that my body is getting worse and worse, and I often feel tired and weak. ”
Xiao Qian: "Me too, my blood pressure is getting higher and higher, I need to pay attention to it." ”
Xiao Zhao: "Then we can go to the gym together to exercise, or go for a walk together." ”
Xiao Qian: "Okay, then let's go exercise together." ”
Zhao and Qian realize that they need to pay attention to each other's health and find solutions to problems together. They started going to the gym together to exercise and pay attention to their diet and rest. Eventually, they managed to survive middle age and build a healthy and happy family.
Case 2: Xiao Sun and Xiao Zhou are a couple who have emotional problems in middle age. They find that their feelings for each other have become indifferent, and they have lost the passion and romance of their youth. One night, they were discussing relationship issues.
Xiao Sun: "Recently, the relationship between us seems to be getting weaker and weaker, and we don't have the same feeling as before. ”
Xiao Zhou: "Yes, I feel this way too, we seem to have become old husbands and wives." ”
Xiao Sun: "Then we can go on a trip together, or do something we used to enjoy together, and rekindle the passion between us." ”
Xiao Zhou: "Okay, then let's go on a trip together." ”
Sun and Zhou realized they needed to rekindle their passion for each other and work together to find a solution to the problem. They started traveling together and doing some of the things they used to love together. Eventually, they managed to survive middle age and build a loving and vibrant family.
In conclusion, the three most difficult periods in a marriage are the newlywed, after the birth of a child, and middle age. In order to survive these times, couples need to maintain good communication and understanding, respect each other's feelings and needs, and learn to be tolerant and compromising. If both husband and wife can work together, they can get through these difficult times and build a happy and fulfilling marriage.