Marriage has been very important for thousands of years, men and women marry, yin and yang, and continue to future generations. It symbolizes love and gestation, in the washing of wave after wave of timesleft a sentence from the ancestors, "I would rather marry a second flower than marry a leftover". So what is a "second flower"? What is a "left behind"?
First of all, let's talk about the "second flower", which actually refers to a divorced woman, it can also be said that on the premise that you have already been married once, you are married again. In ancient times, women's marriage could not escape all kinds of feudal etiquette, although in ancient etiquette, divorced women were allowed to remarry, but many times very few people were willing to remarry them, unless there was true love.
In such a harsh humanistic environment,Few women will propose and leave, because the contempt of the times often falls on women. Unless the woman who wants to reconcile and divorce has a strong family background, many divorced women are actually in a passive situation and are divorced by men.
Whether it is an active or passive divorce, divorced women need to return to their parents' homes. But feudal etiquette is cannibalism, backMost of the women who come to their parents' homes are not welcomed, and some are even ashamed of it. For the sake of the so-called family's face, everyone in the mother's family will try their best to remarry the divorced woman.
And the woman who marries again is not welcomed, and even the standard for marrying is the lowest, otherwise why would you say "I would rather marry a second flower"? The word "Ning" in it is semantically full of reluctanceIn other words, marrying a divorced woman is a forced choice.
Because in ancient times, a woman's chastity was regarded as extremely importantDivorce is equivalent to absence of chastityTherefore, it is a great gift for them to be willing to marry. But in fact, from the literal interpretation of the word "flower", it can be known that the women who are called "second flowers" belong to the time when Jiahua is in its prime, and most of them are also young and beautiful, but they divorced not long after they got married.
Speaking of "second flowers", and then talk about "the left behind", because there is a set of contrasting relationships, from the "rather marry the second flower, not marry the left behind" can be seen, people in ancient times would rather marry a divorced woman than marry the "left behind".It shows that the status of the "left behind" is not as good as the "second flower".
The "bereaved" can be translated as the person who has been left behind, and in more detail, in layman's terms, a widow. This kind of woman is different from the youth and beauty of the "second flower", but has reached a certain ageAnd most of them are women who have given birth.
So from the objective perspective of ancient men, marrying the bereaved person is equivalent to bearing an extra life pressure, and secondly, in ancient times, which paid great attention to the signs of providenceWidows are often given the name "kefu", which is hailed as a bad omen. The woman who seems to be called the "leftover" is more unfortunate than the "second flower", which is also the pathos of the times.
This can also be seenThe oppression of the times is great for women, and the social status of men and women is also extremely unequalIf a man is in this kind of marriage situation, he will not worry about not being able to marry someone, because as long as he is a little, then a man with a little ability has the blessing of the times, of course, this is not absolute, there is no absolute.
I'd rather marry a second flower than marry a bequeath" There may be a certain philosophy of social reality and a certain summary of experienceBut it's more of an injusticeThis kind of injustice does not refer to the individual level, but to the social level of the vast era.
This is a label of inequality between men and women, but there is no absolute equality in the world, but this label has become an internalized bad habit, and it seems to be much more ignorant. In ancient times, the loud banner of "men are superior to women" set off a strong cannibalistic atmosphereAs Mr. Lu Xun said: "As a result, the 'bright moonlight' has become a necessary means to cover up the darkness." ”
It's always hard to figure out why men can always gaze at women with staring eyes. There is a hierarchy of "gaze" at the beginning, how to say this truth, and there is uniqueness in truthThe normal three views are that everyone is equal, even if it is divided into men and women.
Many people rely on a reasonable sentence is "men make money to support their families, women marry and teach children", the core of this sentence has been misinterpreted by countless people, never touch the truth, because the truth is preciousThis sentence is more important than any kind of powerIt doesn't mean anything superior.
Because of the strength of men, they can become pillars; Because of the softness and carefulness of women, it is possible to bring a home to life. These are responsibilities, and each person has different responsibilitiesIt is not a social standard quantification, and it does not mean that everyone has to follow it.
In fact, the core issue is people's thoughts, and the enlightenment of thought can reflect the state of a society, just like Mr. Lu Xun gave up medicine and followed literature, incarnated as a bullet, and splashed ink with a pen, every word, every **, every proseThrough the times, straight into our hearts.