Do you know why people go to fortune telling? On the surface, it is feudal superstition, but in fact, it is because of the difficulties encountered in life. When a person is having a good time, he can't remember to tell a fortune. But fortune telling won't teach you how to live better. He's just helping you make excuses. Make you comfortable for a while, and after a few days it's ** again. Because the placebo expired.
Several classic words of fortune tellers:
1. You haven't had a good fortune in 10 years, and it's fine after these two years.
2. If you commit a villain in your life, you will have problems getting along with the leader.
3. Feelings are rotten peach blossoms, please make a harmony.
4. You need the support of nobles, and you will be transferred immediately.
The most amazing thing about fortune telling is that when you can't calculate accurately, you never suspect that fortune telling is cheating money, but say that this ** Tao will not work, and then continue to look for masters. Tens of thousands of tosses back and forth may be gone, and you still don't think you have met a master. This is a typical example of letting the deceitful group turn around and feel that they are unlucky.
02.What is Counseling?
There are two types of people who can come for psychological counseling:
1. I was deceived by a fortune teller and suddenly woke up one day, did I lie to me? It's been 5 years, and I can't get 10 years of Universiade? Damn, the fortune teller has spent almost 20,000 yuan, and there is no use for fart!
2. Have a very high level of self-awareness, knowing that it is not a problem with life, but an overactive and defensive reaction caused by one's social maladaptation.
What is Counseling?
1) Psychological counseling for depression.
Counselling can reduce the duration of depression because the client becomes more aware. She was aware of the power of her will, she realized how she should see herself when depression appeared, she was aware of what measures she should take, and she knew how to act quickly. If you learn this ability to be aware, you will become wiser.
2) The enlightenment of psychological counseling to life.
When the mind becomes a way of life, the person will slowly become a contemplative observer: he will pay as much attention to the inner world as he does to the external world. In contemplation, inner activities such as daydreaming, night dreaming, thoughts, feelings, insight, intuition, and understanding become more and more important. Of course, this is not to say that the external realities will be ignored, but that we have learned to understand them better and understand their impact on the inner world. The contemplative becomes more cautious, they don't act lightly, but as long as they do, they will be very deliberate, and in the long run, they may achieve more.
3) Psychological counseling helps the family of origin.
If you hate mom, then you need a female counselor. Recreate the generalized effects of your misogynistic dislike of women in a counseling relationship.
If you can't handle a relationship with a man, you need a male counselor. Even if empathy arises along the way, don't be afraid. That's when you're recovering. The feeling of lower head that occurs after empathy will also be reproduced in the counseling relationship. The wound is uncovered and healed. You'll learn how to handle real-life relationships. I hate my female boss because you hate my mother.
Counselling is all about exposing your vulnerability in a genuine relationship, and then**.
4) Psychological counseling allows you to stop deceiving yourself with lies.
The so-called lie is to cover up the truth and make one's own understanding inconsistent with the actual situation. The past is gone, and you cling to your past self, which does not correspond to the current situation, or even completely disconnects, is a lie. Counsellors ask clients to let go of their past selves in order to expose their lies and help them face reality. So, why do people hold on to their past selves? There are two reasons: one is that the past self is spoiled, I feel very comfortable, and I am unwilling to change, and this lazy psychology is destined to hinder the path of growth; The second is that the past self did not receive the love of his parents, and was even hurt, and his heart was full of fear.
The sick self is the outdated self, and it is a kind of pathological manifestation for people to hold on to their past selves.
There is a saying in counseling: real change happens outside an hour. That is to say, some things are like seeds, buried in the ground, and then they will not be seen for a long time. But don't be discouraged, the whole thing doesn't stop there. During this time, in fact, there has been a very potential change, that is, this seed is constantly growing and growing until it breaks through the soil. The soil that nourishes this seed and makes it constantly change is the life of each person.
6) Brave people are suitable for psychological counseling.
Psychological counseling is about fighting against human nature
Perhaps the reason why we are human beings is that we can change our nature and transcend our nature. Accepting psychology is probably the most unnatural, but the most humane behavior. In the psyche, we not only have to free ourselves and accept the sharpest challenges of others, but we also have to spend money on it. It takes courage to accept the psychology. Many people avoid psychology**, not because of a lack of money, but because of a lack of courage. Some people who go to a counselor are considered weak-willed by others, and even criticized and ridiculed by others, but in fact, they are far braver than bystanders, because they dare to accept **. Even in the early stages of the test, the counselor challenged them to the map of life, and they were able to persevere, which is enough to prove that they are braver and stronger than others.
To get you to accept the challenge quickly, counselors often use a free-associative approach to encourage patients to tell the truth. For example, if you are asked to say the first thing that comes to mind, you can say whatever comes to mind, no matter how unimportant it may seem. Even if they seem meaningless, you have to say them. If two or three things come to mind at the same time, say the one you least want to say. If you actively cooperate, you can often achieve miraculous results. Some people have a strong sense of resistance, pretending to cooperate, but deliberately hiding the most important part.
We must be true to the facts, and although this will bring temporary suffering, it is far better than wallowing in false comfort. We must endure temporary discomfort, pursue facts rather than illusions, and endure the pain of the process. For the mind to grow and the mind mature, it is necessary to do everything in our might, at all costs, and to be completely faithful to the facts.
07) Why is psychological counseling more effective than fortune telling?
This is because the part that plays the biggest role in determining happiness is precisely the part where psychological counseling can intervene.
Psychological counseling cannot make the person being counseled rich overnight, but it can enable him to complete the change of mentality overnight. The final point of our counseling, the retelling of the story, is to help you break through the harmful, closed stories of the past and rebuild a healthy, open-ended, and powerful story. And the retelling of the story is actually to forcefully reverse this controllable part, so that you can gain happiness.
Many people ask me: Is it true that people who seek a counselor are mentally ill?
I said, "No." If a person wants to know the meaning of his life, he can also come to psychological counseling.
08) How psychological counseling works:
There are four steps.
1 Awareness:
If you are not aware of the existence of something in your psyche, you cannot change it.
2 Understanding:
Understand why you have the way of thinking, the source is in the **, you can know why you are the way you are.
3 Abandonment:
Really let go of those unreasonable beliefs from the perspective of a bystander, and don't let these things continue to guide your behavior.
4 Reconstruction:
Rebuild correct values and reasonable beliefs, so that the life of the twisted Ba begins to become orderly and full of hope!
09) How to find a good counselor?
Counseling is not an endless digging of the past
This is a misconception that many people have about counselling: counseling is all about going over everything from when you are very young or even have no memory.
Freud was very good at this: for example, he thought that you don't dare to deal with people today because your mother treated you like that when you were a child; If you look back at the problems you have now, and find out that something happened to you in the past, many times it will go back to your original family.
In counselling, it is possible to do a limited review: for example, to understand what he has experienced, his general background, whether he has a history of abuse, and traumatic events, but not to dig back all the time, which is a very heavy force.
Fang Siqi, her death is related to the method used by her counselor, the counselor's best plan is to constantly review, constantly bring her back to the past experience, and keep repeating the severity of her trauma: You are experiencing the scene of a nuclear explosion. Being treated like this, people have no hope, and there is no way to get out. Some people are willing to talk about their past injuries over and over again, and don't go to such a counselor. He's a**you.
For more advice on how to find a good counselor, you can see here:For more advice on how to find a good counselor, you can see here: A must-see for choosing a reliable counselor.
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