Time flies, as if in a blink of an eye, I have passed the threshold of thirty and become the father of two little ones.
Time flies, I have matured, and my parents are quietly aging. The once upright figure gradually faded, and his black hair was now dyed white.
Looking back, I can't help but feel a little unfilial.
I grew up in a small mountain village in the Yimeng Mountains, the only son in my family. My parents pinned all their expectations on me.
However, I did not become a model in their eyes.
My father was born into a large family, he had three brothers and two sisters, and he was the third.
The uncle's family has a son and a daughter, the daughter is a **, and the son is a teacher. The uncle and aunt were the envy of the whole village.
The second uncle's family has two daughters, the eldest went to college and settled in the provincial capital. Although the second child is not very good at school, he also got a job in the provincial capital because of the relationship between the eldest sister.
The second uncle and the second aunt stopped farming early, because the support of their two daughters allowed them to live far beyond ordinary needs. They lived a comfortable life and only wanted to enjoy happiness.
My dad only has me as a child, but unfortunately I am really not a good child. Since childhood, in addition to fishing and touching shrimp, it is a fight.
When I was studying, my academic performance was terrible and I often got into trouble, and my dad was always full of emotion when he mentioned that time. He often said that if the teacher did not invite parents for three days, he would feel that the sun was rising in the west. He often followed behind me, solved the mess for me, and spent all day except apologizing, as if life was on the road to apology.
caught up with fishing and shrimp, got into a fight, had to take money, gifts, and even his old face. Every time my dad mentions these things, I always get stuck in memories and wonder if I was so naughty when I was a kid.
My mom always explained: "Removing the word 'Tao' is even more powerful than what your dad said!" You may not remember anything else, but you can always remember the summer of fifth grade. You encourage your uncle and some of your cousin's brothers to go to the reservoir to bathe. You can swim, but your uncle's brother can't, and he almost drowned, and your father whipped you half to death. ”
I do remember it, but I was really wronged that time. My brother has always been a nerd and has been immersed in reading since he was a teenager. According to his parents' arrangement, the uncle didn't let him go out, so he stayed at home honestly. But that day, for some reason, he suddenly decided to follow us down the river to play.
I laughed at him for being a landlubber, not as good as a girl, and he got angry and followed us into the water. Indeed, almost drowned.
He was a few years older than us, and he was tall, and no one dared to save him when he was splashing in the water. I quickly climbed out of the water and ran home to find the adults. It happened that he met a cousin and he was saved.
But my dad beat me up wrongfully, I said it had nothing to do with me, but it seems that adults always think that I am a bad child, whether I did it or not, and beat me to appease the anger of my aunt and uncle.
My dad said it was all for my good.
I smiled and was truly grateful that they had thought out of me.
I finally got mixed up until I graduated from junior high school, and after graduation, I went to the city with a group of friends of the same age.
After entering the city, I found that it is really difficult to find a good job without a diploma.
Fortunately, I was not afraid of hardship, so I decided to go to a factory to learn electrical welding.
I have always believed that as long as you give sincerely, you will always get a corresponding return.
I believe that as long as you master a technology, you can have a foothold.
My master saw that I was studying hard and taught me even more dedicatedly. He told me that in order to truly master a technology, it is first necessary to rely on one's ability to comprehend, and secondly, one's accumulation of experience.
The master was able to guide me to the threshold, but the practice depended on personal effort.
I have always kept my master's teachings in mind, and after ten years, I am finally able to take charge of my own affairs, and my salary has saved tens of thousands of yuan.
However, I didn't tell my parents the truth, I only told them that my salary was only more than 6,000 yuan, barely enough to live on my own.
Thankfully, my parents didn't expect much from me, and as long as I didn't go down the wrong path, they were grateful.
I smiled to myself.
At the age of 27, I married my lover, and the wedding house was bought in the provincial capital, with a total price of 970,000 yuan, and I chose to make a down payment of 500,000 yuan.
My parents took 400,000 yuan, and I know it's their life savings.
Even though my parents didn't have much of a job and no income other than farming**, I still feel very lucky.
At 400,000, they may have painstakingly raised.
My elderly grandparents were sick all the year round and lived in the same hospital as my parents, but my parents always used various excuses to shirk and rarely worried about their medical expenses, which were mostly borne by my parents.
I couldn't help but ask my parents, why don't you reason with the eldest and second uncles?
Dad said that in the treatment of the elderly, personal filial piety is a personal matter, so why compare:
We have many brothers, and there is always some emotion of comparison. Only children of your generation have a lot of responsibilities to care for the elderly, but they are their parents, whether they are their parents. Let it be as long as their own conscience can ......”
I think when Dad said this, he may have forgotten that there are many people who have no conscience.
When I got married, my parents provided another 100,000 yuan, saying that it was the bride price and the cost of wine.
I didn't ask for it, and insisted on not asking for a bride price.
After having a baby, my mother has been following us to take care of the child because she is not worried about finding a nanny.
Originally, I wanted to find my dad a job in the city so that he could live with him, so that we could be reunited as a family and he could enjoy family fun.
But my dad didn't want to, he said that there were old people at home, how could he leave?
So my dad still stayed at home and planted two acres of land and took care of my grandparents.
The eldest uncle and the second uncle basically don't care, and the two aunts will occasionally go to see it, cook some delicious food for the grandparents, and help them wash and wash up.
They all said that with my dad taking care of them, my grandparents could rest assured.
And every Spring Festival, I take my wife, children and mother back to my hometown to spend the reunion with my father, grandparents.
This spring, my father-in-law passed away in an accident.
His wife and brother also settled down outside, and after his father-in-law died, his mother-in-law was the only one left in his hometown.
His wife and brother wanted to take his mother-in-law to his house, but his mother-in-law was reluctant.
The wife asked her mother-in-law why she preferred to be home alone, and the mother-in-law said that the time she spent with her daughter-in-law was too short
They have been married for seven or eight years, and we can really be together for no more than two months.
To be honest, it's not much different from strangers, let alone mutual understanding.
I went to her, she was awkward, I was awkward, it was better to be at home alone, ......”
In general, the mother-in-law is unwilling to wronged herself, nor does she want her daughter-in-law to be wronged.
The daughter-in-law proposed that her mother-in-law come to their house for a period of time, and with my mother by her side, she could get out of the grief of losing her wife as soon as possible.
I agreed, without him, just so that my mother has been in my house for so many years, and her daughter-in-law has never blushed.
I have understood this truth.
After my mother-in-law came, she got along quite well with my mother, which made me feel relieved, and my daughter-in-law was also happy.
My mom suggested that my mother-in-law be here to help us take care of the children, and she would go back to her hometown by herself.
After all, my dad is still in his hometown, and my grandparents are still there.
I didn't say yes.
Compared to my mother-in-law, the two children are more dependent on my mother.
In addition, the second child of his wife's brother's family is about to be born, and he didn't use his mother-in-law to help when he had the first child, and the second child heard that his wife and brother wanted to ask his mother-in-law to help.
If my mom goes back and my mother-in-law is gone, she'll have to come back.
However, seeing that the Chinese New Year was approaching, my mother was a little anxious to go back to her hometown.
I told her that we weren't going back to our hometown this year, and that we would just spend it here.
After the 20th, I went home to pick up my dad.
They are all quite old, have spent their entire lives in the countryside, and know nothing about the city. While they are all here, I plan to drive around with them, visiting nearby tourist attractions and allowing them to experience the care of my son and son-in-law.
I mentioned this plan to my dad, and he happily agreed. He said that he was content to be able to visit the city once in his life: "Who said that my son is unproductive? My son is more filial than anyone else, and now he still wants to take me on a trip! ”
When I heard that, I felt a little sad. Their expectations are actually quite simple, but I've never really put myself in their shoes.
Unexpectedly, as soon as I told my father about this New Year's plan, I received a ** from my aunt: I heard that you are not going home for the New Year this year, and you plan to let your father come to your side for the New Year? ”
Yes, auntie, that's exactly what I told my dad. I've been married for more than a decade, and I've been away from home for more than a decade, and my dad has come to my house less than ten times in total, let alone a few more days. I want to take advantage of the fact that we don't go back for the Chinese New Year this year, take him out to spend the New Year with us, and then take him to the city for a walk, and let him see the wider world. He and my mom have worked hard all their lives, and I want them to enjoy the company of my son......”
You asked your dad to come to you for the New Year, have you thought about what your grandparents will do after he leaves? ”
I was a little puzzled: "Auntie, what do you mean by that?" My grandparents have three sons and two daughters, my grandfather is 89 years old and my father is 60 years old, that is, my father has been with my grandfather for 60 years. According to the age of 70, I am considered an old man, from the age of 70 to the age of 89, these 19 Spring Festivals were spent by my parents with them. The eldest uncle, the second uncle, you and the second aunt are all their children, what my father can do, why can't you do it? My dad can't accompany them for this only one Spring Festival, so why can't any of you spend a Spring Festival with them? ”
The aunt was a little embarrassed: "It's not because your father has accompanied your grandparents for the holidays for so many years, and suddenly stopped accomplishing it, I'm afraid that your grandparents won't be able to accept ......."”
If any of you can spare time to spend the Spring Festival with them, how can they not accept it? Children are all the same! As long as you put your mind to it, I believe that my grandparents will be happier, after all, the filial piety of more than one son is more precious ......than the filial piety of all children”
Aunt hung up**. I said to my mother, "Tell me, he just pretends he doesn't hear what people say." We do not accept this method of moral kidnapping, ......”
My mom agreed. I'm going home to pick up my dad in two days, and now I just hope that dad won't change his mind. I also hope that my relatives will stop treating honest and kind people with the responsibility of filial piety. If you really have filial piety, you can learn from my dad and spend every Spring Festival happily with my grandparents.