In this fast-paced society, divorce is no longer uncommon. Some people get divorced once, hoping to find true happiness a second time. But here's the problem, if the first time didn't go well, then the second time must be smooth?
It has been said that "a failed marriage prepares the way for a happy marriage". Yes, a failed marriage can allow us to grow and better understand what we want. But if you think that you will be happy if you remarry, it is quite naïve, marriage is not a fight, and it is not a panacea.
In fact, remarriage is no less problematic than that of first marriage. First of all, both of them have a sad past, they may not trust each other, and they have to deal with the affairs of their exes, the affairs of their children, and how to divide their property, and these contradictions are much more than the first time. Starting a new family involves more complex family relationships that require greater wisdom and tolerance.
For example, Mr. Zhang and Ms. Li have been married for several years and have a child. Both are working in the field and are not yet a place, so they can only be reunited on weekends. Although Ms. Li has a stable job, she feels that Mr. Zhang has changed too much when she was in love, and she panicked when she saw too many loving couples around her.
Ms. Li sometimes gets sick, but Mr. Zhang only talks about it, but he doesn't really care much. Ms. Li gradually felt that Mr. Zhang did not care about her, and the two always quarreled, and Ms. Li felt that she could not live this day, so she had to divorce Mr. Zhang. Mr. Zhang disagreed, but Ms. Li insisted on a divorce. But she didn't have a good time after remarrying, and she regretted it, so she always inquired about Mr. Zhang's news.
She remarried and became someone's stepmother, her husband didn't trust her, she was always on guard, and her current husband's children couldn't get along with her, which made her life too uncomfortable. Besides, her current mother-in-law doesn't want to see her, and there were no such conflicts with her ex-husband's family before, and her father-in-law took care of her in every way.
The failure of the first marriage is usually due to many conflicts such as personality, values, and living habits. If these problems are not solved, it is easy to recur when remarrying.
In addition, when we remarry, we are often burdened with the shadow of the previous marriage, which will also affect the relationship of the new marriage. Remarried couples have to deal with more complex relationships, especially ex-spouses, property, children, etc., which can make the new marriage more difficult.
In addition, the psychological expectations of both parties are also more complicated, although remarriage may bring us new hope, but it does not mean that we will be happy, and the first failure does not mean that the second time will also fail. The key is whether both parties can truly solve the problems that led to the breakdown of the previous marriage, and only by truly understanding and accepting each other and working together for happiness can we truly have a happy marriage.
As the famous saying goes, "True happiness is to manage it with your heart, not simply pin your hopes on the next marriage." ”
If you want to have a happy marriage, don't escape from reality, but find problems in marriage, don't think that you have met the wrong person in this marriage, in fact, you will regret your marriage and whoever you marry, just as there is a saying that "marriage itself is wrong, and a good marriage is wrong." "Yes, no matter who you marry, you will encounter all kinds of contradictions, marriage is not smooth sailing, only in the marriage slowly run-in, two people face problems together.
If the first marriage is not good, the remarriage will not necessarily be good, and we must solve the problems of the previous marriage to avoid the same problems in the next marriage, as long as the problem is solved, whether it is the first marriage or the second marriage, it will be happy. But we must cherish our marriage, the first marriage is relatively better to solve the problem, and the relationship will be complicated if we remarry, so we must cherish the marriage and not avoid the problems encountered in the marriage.