Objectively speaking, I am one of the more miserable ones, 38 this year, and I am only a second-line section chief of the ** organ in Chengdu, the family has no savings, and all rely on a meager income to support my wife and children.
As for why this is so, according to my actual situation, I have summarized the following reasons for your reference.
1. Unwilling to communicate, especially unwilling to ask for help.
Whenever someone asks me for help, I will be very active in doing it, I am a very kind person and rarely refuse anyone. But when there is a request for someone, he can't say anything.
Just like when he moved before, he was always embarrassed to take out a loan from a friend, for fear of affecting the relationship between the two. However, when my good brothers and comrades asked me for it, I couldn't pull my face, so I often borrowed it. A friend of his, who hadn't paid back the money for eight years, could only comfort himself with the fact that he was lost.
She has a shy personality and does not like to come into contact with people, nor does she like to come into contact with people.
In this world, everyone needs each other, and I can understand that it is also a very happy thing to be disturbed. However, he has always been reluctant to take the initiative, perhaps because he is too shy to try.
He felt that his career development was always thought that the above would take him into account, and he never said his requirements, so he was delayed, and now, he has no hope for the future.
2. I don't like to drink alcohol and socialize.
Has a natural resistance to alcohol, allergies to alcohol. When I was in the army, I couldn't drink, and at first, my friends invited me, but later, they thought I didn't drink well, so they left.
When I first came, he liked to drink, but I didn't like it, he just liked to drink water, and then I felt that he was unhappy with me, and that his future in the army was not very good.
He has changed jobs and occasionally goes to some social events, but he doesn't dare to drink. My stomach is already uncomfortable, so every time I eat, I try to avoid it, and I feel bored when eating, and the people around me are all hypocritical, which makes me very unhappy.
3. Being too rational and cautious.
Maybe it was because he had nothing since he was a child, he started from scratch, and felt that he couldn't take any wrong path, and in this context, he became timid as a mouse, and he had to think twice before doing anything, and was too rational.
At work, he is careful and careful in everything he does, not wanting to make mistakes for fear of causing trouble to himself and others.
It is precisely because of this psychology that he does not dare to take risks, always hides in the shell of a turtle, and misses many opportunities.
For example, 11 years ago, when we bought a house, the house price was still very low, 6,000 per square meter, and many friends persuaded me to add a few thousand, but I didn't have the courage at that time, so I could only buy 2 sets. But last year, he was forced to change houses, and the house price rose to 26,000, and he felt that if he bought a larger one, he would have been able to buy a better one.
4. Think about others and think too much about others.
In life, he feels that his concern for the other party is a very hard thing, and in the end, the other party can't understand him at all, and even causes some unnecessary misunderstandings.
Let's take marriage as an example, I didn't love my wife at first, but I thought I would make her sad, so I didn't know what to do, so my marriage became unhappy.
However, I think that people's lives are very short, and it depends on their own opinions, and it is not a simple matter to work hard to adapt.