In the year of eighty, he published his first work "Autumn Garden", followed by "Driftwood" the following year, and "My Fragrance" in the third year.
She is Yang Benfen, known as the 'stove writer'. She loved reading all her life, and because the other party said, 'I'll help you study', she got married in a hurry. ”
However, it was because of this decision that she suffered more than sixty years of grievances in her marriage.
Her husband behaved like a good gentleman and a perfect husband on the outside, but he was extremely cold to her, refusing to even say a word of concern.
She endured humiliation, took on heavy responsibilities, and for the sake of her children, she managed the family in good order and spent more than sixty years in a loveless marriage.
She thought she had done it perfectly, but in her old age, she only got this sentence from her husband: "I don't want to be with you again in the next life." ”
In her later years, she picked up a pen and recorded her real experience, but she did not expect it to resonate with countless people.
Her work received an 8 on Douban9 high scores, from which we also learned about her story.
So, what is the state of this unhappy marriage that she is describing?
At the age of 17, she was admitted to Xiangyin Industrial School and became the pride of the whole village. However, the unexpected is what happened.
At the age of 18, due to her father's former official position, she was transferred to a lower-level unit by the school, and although she was reluctant, she could not change the situation.
It was then that a man broke into her life and said to her, "I can support you in going to school as long as you are willing to marry me." ”
Her future husband is this man-Lu Song, she thinks that the other party is polite and a doctor, so she agreed.
However, unexpectedly, after marriage, the other party never mentioned the matter of letting her continue to go to school, and even ignored it when she occasionally brought it up.
Occasionally, when she anxiously asks a question, the other person will comfort her and say, "Don't bother with studying, I can provide for you." That's when she realized she had been tricked into marriage.
So, what did she do next to save herself?
After learning the truth, she also considered separating, but she was married and had no chance to regret it, so she could only let everything continue.
She even made excuses for the other party in her heart: "He must have taken such extreme measures because he loved him too deeply." However, then his actions hit her hard in the face.
In order to ease the burden of life, she decided to temporarily put aside her studies and go to the countryside to work, so as not to cause trouble to her family.
Due to her excellent performance, coupled with her level of education, she managed to get a job teaching in a kindergarten.
She was in a happy mood, but at this moment she learned that she was pregnant, and finally had to give up that job.
However, when she shared this joy with her husband, she found that the other party's attitude was very cold.
She had thought that the other party was not good at words, but she did not expect that when she was eight months pregnant, he would not even pour a glass of water.
He also pua her, telling her: "Don't be too squeamish", which makes her finally realize that the other party doesn't love her at all.
She is married and pregnant, but life has to go on. In the days that followed, she took on all the responsibilities of the family alone, trying not to trouble him.
What made her feel even more chilling was that he was unwilling to accompany her even when she gave birth, and hid in the dormitory under the pretext of being afraid of blood. Behold?
When the sheep at home give birth, they can be pulled out with their bare hands. Rewrite as: At home, when giving birth to sheep, you can use both hands to take out the lambs.
His every gesture seems to declare: I have no affection for you! It also made her life even more hopeless.
She is glad that in this hopeless life, she still has books as a companion. She always tries her best to borrow as many books as she can read.
She can briefly forget the pain of life in the sea of books, however, daily trivialities still break this beauty from time to time.
When she went out to play, she took her children with her, and it wasn't until she came home that she found that everything in the house had been burned.
When her husband saw this, he scolded her, which made her feel so sad that she even had suicidal thoughts.
Hearing her daughter's cry, she was pulled back to reality, and from then on, she threw herself wholeheartedly into her child.
She didn't want to pay any attention to the man until the kids were admitted to college, and the relationship between the two began to ease.
In order for the children to have books to read, they work together to earn money. Sending money to his children every month became his happiest moment.
He silently cleared the weeds on the children's path so that their way home would be smoother.
She felt that her husband's condition was gradually improving, so she thought she had succeeded in infecting him. She began to adopt an attitude of family unity, and gradually forgot the unhappiness of the past.
They walked through the eighty-year-old years uneventfully, until one day, she suddenly asked him like a young girl: "If there is still a chance in the next life, will you still choose to be with me?" ”
In the end, the other party refused without hesitation, and even when asked why, he refused to explain more.
She didn't give up, and after a while, she repeated the same question, but still got three cold words: "Unwilling".
She suddenly felt that her efforts for more than 60 years were meaningless, even if it was a "diamond wedding" in the eyes of others, in fact, her heart was rotten.
The love she and he formed because of "reading", until the end, she failed to get the love she longed for.
So, in the past, when it was believed that "a woman is virtuous if she is not talented", why did she pursue reading so relentlessly?
Although her family was not wealthy, the family atmosphere was very harmonious, and her parents had a good relationship with each other, and they also doted on her.
However, despite the fact that her father was the head of the township, her health had not been good, which also caused her studies to be affected.
Perhaps, the best things are often not available, so when she entered school at the age of ten, she was particularly happy and had an unusual affection for reading.
After that, she did not disappoint her family, but was successfully admitted to Yueyang Industrial School and became the pride of her family.
Although her school life was a bit boring, it was happy for her, as she focused on her desire to acquire knowledge and had no time for anything else.
As she was about to graduate, the school suddenly closed, an accident that prevented her from getting her degree certificate for many years.
She went through a series of twists and turns in her reading experience, and at one point it was difficult to accept, and even considered ending her own life.
Her decisive decision provided an opportunity for her future husband.
In the moment of midnight dreaming, did she ever regret her strong beliefs?
However, in her later years, perhaps what she really longed for was to be able to win people's recognition for her talents, not just reading books.
In the marriage relationship, one of the most hurtful words is undoubtedly "cold violence", you have nowhere to confide in your grievances, and you can't find an outlet for your inner anger.
Moreover, in this story, the protagonist's husband has been showing the good side as seen by the outside world, which makes it even more difficult for the protagonist to tell about his troubles.
At that time, divorce was seen as a shame, but it is no longer a social phenomenon.
Just like the popular Internet adage says: "Marriage is the pursuit of happiness, and so is divorce"!