Hello everyone, I'm "little him", after reading this article, you can click on it if you think it's good".Attention”。He has material and focuses on funny.
A few days ago, my head hurt a little and I was in a trance during the day, so I went to the hospital for a check-up.
The doctor said to me, "Go back and lie down." ”
I nervously asked, "Doctor, don't you need to prescribe medicine or anything?" Are there any taboos or anything? ”
The doctor said, "Eat whatever you want." ”
As soon as I heard this, I sat down on the chair with my feet limp in an instant, thinking that this time was over, and I guess something big had happened.
Then the doctor told me: "You have holiday syndrome, you sleep too late at night, just recuperate for a few days." ”
My mother, it turned out that this was the case, and I was almost said by the doctor''Eat whatever you want'Scared to faint! 」
This is actually short-lived.
As soon as the eyes were closed and opened, the morning ** passed, howl ?
As soon as I closed my eyes and opened them again, this afternoon** passed again, howl ?
What's the most painful thing, you know? It's "** from 2000 to 6000, but I am a ...... of empty positions."”
What's the most painful thing, you know? It's "** from 6000 to 2000, but I am a full ......."”
I remember when I was in college, one night in a self-study class, I wanted my table leader to make a foreign appearance, so I pasted a piece of paper behind him, and the paper drew a pig. There was a very fat girl at the back table of him, and the fat girl laughed violently when she saw it, and the louder she laughed, the louder she laughed, and the class leader asked her why she laughed. The fat girl smiled and pointed to the squad leader and said, "There's a pig ...... behind you."”
Today I saw an uncle selling cakes on the side of the road on the street:
I thought: This cake is two dollars and three, why is it that there are only five pieces of four dollars?
When I couldn't figure it out, my friend patted me on the shoulder and said, "This is reverse marketing, many people think they are smart, and if they have a advantage, they will come for two copies of 2 yuan, but the boss of the other family does not lose." ”
A man went to the doctor and said he had a headache every time he smiled. After the doctor's examination, he told him: "Your question is simple, you just need to stop laughing." ”
One of my roommates was a big nerve. One day, the roommate woke up early, half-asleep with toothpaste and was about to brush his teeth, when another buddy who was still lying on the bed glanced at him and asked, "Why don't you get up so early to wash your hair?" The roommate replied with an "um", then squeezed the toothpaste on his head and began to wash his hair......
A person who often boasts of an IQ of 200 and has been tested at a certain **, I ask him, "Are you sure you didn't get it wrong?" He said, "Surely not!" I said, "I think I'm undertesting you." The second goods looked happy: "What a bosom friend!" I said, "I think I've undertested you by at least 50 points." ”
Hello, Mr. Zhang, if you are still satisfied with this call, you can give me a satisfactory rating, thank you".
As soon as the telemarketing intern finished the customer's **, he dialed the next customer, **After dialing, he glanced at the customer's name Zhu Xiaoye, and didn't wait to think about how to call it**, and the intern hurriedly responded: "Is it a wild seed (Mr. Ye)?" ”
Customer: "....Well, who are you? ”
Intern: "I'm sorry, Mr. Zhu (Zhu), I'm ......”
Customer: "You're the wild seed, your whole family is pigs!" ”
* :( toot, toot, toot ......）
Intern: ......
Hahaha, that's a really hard name
The best friend quarreled with her boyfriend, but no one refused to give in, she was so angry that she smashed the wall with her hand, and her boyfriend immediately confessed his mistake and apologized in distress. After hearing about this, I wrote it down, and I used this trick to quarrel with my boyfriend today, who knew that this wall was too pitiful, and I smashed it straight down, and my boyfriend was so frightened that he knelt down with a poof!
My son, who is six years old this year, said to him at noon in order to put him to sleep: "Son, let's play a game, I will be the commander, you will be the guard, and you will listen to my orders." ”
The son is happy because he likes to play games the most. After five minutes of playing, I said to my son, "Guard, the commander now orders you to go to bed." ”
The son said unhappily: "Mom, don't the guards have to stand guard?" ”
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