Hello everyone, I'm "he said", welcome to watch "Joke Collection" (Attached: The weather is getting cold, everyone pay attention to keep warm!）
My wife had an awkward relationship with me again, and I tried my best to coax her, but she still kept a straight face, and then said four words: "Perfect match".
I pondered it carefully, and immediately understood, and went downstairs to the braised vegetable shop to buy two catties of pork face meat....The pig's face must be harmonious!
The wife ate the pork face meat, and said word by word: "The bead is the pearl of the pearl, the chain is the chain of the necklace, and the bead chain must be together!."”
I ......, this wife is really burning money!）
After the night shift last night, I went back with my girlfriend, and found that my stomach hurt badly on the way, so I said to her: "You go buy a wrap paper for me, and I'll go to the toilet." “
I waited for almost half an hour and didn't see him coming, his legs were weak, he couldn't smoke anymore, and there was no one in the toilet. I want to go out and kill you.
When I walked to the door, I saw him holding the bun and said, "Why did you come out, the buns are cold." “
An electric welder opened an electric welding shop, and the shop was named: Welding Emperor Wu. Everyone praised the name of the shop, and he was very proud.
On this day, he went to the candy store next door to show off, and as a result, the candy store owner pulled him to look at the name of his store: Sugar Taizong.
The owner of the candy shop pointed to the cake shop not far away: Han Cake Zu. The two were silent together. At this time, a dung digger rode a dung truck past the two of them, and the two took a closer look at the dung truck and there were three big characters written on it: Capture the.
In the middle of the night, my husband turned over, hugged his wife tightly and said, "Wife, this life is too short......”
When my wife heard this, she shed tears of emotion and hugged her husband tightly, and after her husband broke free, she continued: "I'll go buy a longer quilt tomorrow, I can't cover my feet, it's so cold!."“
Haha, I'm laughing to death, this quilt, this life, which quilt (generation) is it!）
Boss: Uncle, do you want to buy pants?
Uncle: Can I try on these pants?
Boss: Absolutely.
The uncle put it on directly and said: Can you squat?
The boss said confidently: squatting is no problem.
So the uncle squatted a few times and asked: Can I run?
The boss was a little impatient: that needs to be said.
So the uncle ran away, like a rabbit!
My friend asked me, "Stupid".Which of the two bugs under the word is male?Which is the mother's?“
I racked my brains, but I still couldn't answer.
My friend smiled and said, "Men are left, women are right!."Stupid pig!“
The same table is a natural idiot, once in class was taking notes, he suddenly couldn't remember how to write the word "Geng", so he asked me.
I said, "You can't write this, your ears are hot", and my table mate suddenly turned red with anger, and then lowered his head and whispered to me: "You are only two goods!".Your whole family has two goods!”
Hello, Mr. Zhang, if you are still satisfied with this call, you can give me a satisfactory rating, thank you".
As soon as the telemarketing intern finished the customer's **, he dialed the next customer, **After dialing, he glanced at the customer's name Zhu Xiaoye, and didn't wait to think about how to call it**”
Customer: "....Well, who are you?”
Intern: "I'm sorry, Mr. Zhu (Zhu), I'm ......”
Customer: "You're a wild seed, your whole family is a pig!"”
* :( toot, toot, toot ......）
Intern: ......
Hahaha, that's a really hard name
Bao Zheng wanted to name his daughter and asked Gongsun Ce for help: "My mother named me Bao Zheng because she wanted me to save the world. Later, the world called me Bao Qingtian, which also contained bright and beautiful wishes. Hopefully, my child's name will reflect a similar determination to benefit society. What do you call it?”
Gongsun Strategy groaned and said, "Free shipping." ”
In English class, the substitute teacher who just came to me asked me, "What's your name?"”
Me: "Jiang Yingyu." ”
The substitute teacher thought to herself, "I didn't expect the class led by Teacher Han to be so demanding?"”
The substitute teacher walked up to me and asked, "What's your name?"”
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