A year ago, I switched to my current job.
After graduating from university, following the employment craze at that time, I got involved in the "Internet giant" and lived a life of 996 or even 9126. On the only weekend, I didn't want to rest, I studied hard, and I wanted to have a place in the team and the company.
In the first three years, thanks to my courage to fight hard and strong ability to work under pressure, I made rapid progress, and I was in the top 10% of the entire team in each node assessment, and I got along well with the leaders, and my colleagues recognized me very well; Salary increases twice a year, with an increase of more than 15%, and the year-end bonus is also very generous. At the company's annual fresh graduate training meeting, he was used as a role model. At that time, I thought I was the only one in the company.
After three years of work, the questions on the medical examination report are as long as three pages. The work is really tiring, constantly shuttling between the conference rooms on different floors, sometimes the meeting conflicts, you can only choose the important participation, but those who do not participate should also go to the meeting organizer to ask about the content of the meeting when they are free; There are endless emails every day, and there are deadlines every day; We have to do a project review every week and pull all kinds of data for project reporting; When encountering a team that does not cooperate and work that cannot be pushed, there is nothing else but tiredness. Every day when I get home from work, I have a splitting headache and just want to collapse in bed.
My best friend Xiao Z went to a state-owned enterprise after graduation, and she said that my day's work is her week's workload, and she is really idle and panicked, and she always feels that she is going to be eliminated by this world. I scolded her for being hypocritical and unhappy to be idle to make money. She envied me for my high salary, and I envied her for her easy work; She envied me for having more opportunities, and I envied her for getting off work early.
After five years of work, I got pregnant and gave birth. After my maternity leave, I didn't like my job because of the job adjustment. In addition, I worked overtime before and injured my body, I didn't recover well after giving birth, and my body's immunity was very poor, so I couldn't roll others, and the performance appraisal was naturally poor; The most important thing is what my mother said to me, "For so many years, as long as you don't get off work, I can't sleep, for fear that you will be in some danger".
So, after thinking about it for half a year, I made up my mind to change jobs. Only one condition is considered: no overtime. It doesn't matter how much money you have, how little money you have.
Two months later, I joined a state-owned enterprise. Before joining the company, I was told by human resources that the company basically did not work overtime, and I couldn't believe it at the time.
The attendance time of the new company is 9:30-5:00. On the first day of employment, I was a little nervous, hesitating whether to work overtime after five o'clock, after all, I was a newcomer and should be pretending. However, as soon as five o'clock arrived, everyone took their bags and walked out of the office leisurely, and at five :05, I was the only one left in the office. The same situation is the case in the next two weeks, as soon as five o'clock arrives, there is logistics to turn off the lights on time. At this time, I believe that if you are human, the company really doesn't work overtime.
From then on, when it was time to get off work, I had a smile on my face and a happy heart. In the past, how have I ever walked out of the company building at dawn? Now, I can see the sun at five o'clock every day. Moreover, the off-duty here is really off-duty, and I no longer have to pay attention to the company group after work, and no one will pull me to have an online meeting.
Half a year after joining the company, my Jinzhun disease was cured and I never had a headache again; The physical condition is getting better and better, and the physical examination reports are getting better; My family said that my anger was gone, and I was more peaceful.
After a year on the job, after a sweet period, I started to feel a little lost and anxious. I finally understood what Xiao Z said, what kind of state is "idle panic". Afraid that his ability will not be improved, he will stop there; fear that they have no value to the company and are gradually marginalized; Afraid that one day the company will lay off employees and find no way out. It turned out that the crisis had been lurking in the seemingly peaceful and happy days for a long time, but I only realized it.
In fact, I have observed the work status of other people, and everyone's workload is similar, but they have always been in state-owned enterprises and have adapted to this work rhythm; And I was originally efficient and got the job done quickly.
Another reason for the anxiety is that the current position is a marginal position in the whole company, not to mention skill improvement, and has been "eating the old book"; Although it is a state-owned enterprise, it also understands that there is no iron rice bowl now. I am worried that it will be difficult to re-enter the workforce after losing my job.
My mom said that anxiety is due to thinking too much. Indeed, when you are idle, you love to think crankily, and if you think too much, you are easy to get anxious.
So, a year after joining a state-owned enterprise, I began to desperately find something to do for myself. Maybe I was born to be idle.