From childhood to adulthood, every child is like a blank sheet of paper, waiting to be colored on it.
Some of the paper is full of bravery and confidence, while others are hesitant and uncertain.
The kind of promising child you want may be told "you can do it" from an early age, and they are not afraid to fail when learning new things, because they know that failure is just a stepping stone to success.
But in reality, not every child receives such encouragement. Some children may be told "this is not for you" because of a small setback, and over time, this hint becomes their belief.
"You can't do without Hongyi, and there is a long way to go. ”A person with lofty ideals must have a firm will and lofty ambitions.
Zhou Wenyu, formerly known as Xiang Mengnu, was born in a poor family in Yangxian, Yixing.
At the age of eleven, he was discovered by Zhou Hui, the leader of the local guards, because of his outstanding physical fitness, and was adopted by Zhou Hui as his adopted son because of his family's poverty.
After that, he returned to the capital with Zhou Hui. They met the crown prince Zhan Shi Zhou She in the capital, and Zhou Hui asked for a name for Wenyu.
Zhou She named him Wenyu, the word Jingde, and ordered his nephew Hongrang to teach Wenyu to read and arithmetic.
Hongrang is good at official writing, and sent Cai Yong's "Persuasion" and some ancient poems to Wenyu, but Wenyu was not interested at first, he said to Hongrang: "Who wants to learn this, if you want to be rich, you only need a big gun." Hongrang admired his courage very much, so he taught him to ride and shoot, and Wenyu was very happy.
Later, Qingzhi sent Zhou Hui to lead five hundred people to Xincai to pacify Baishuiman, but the barbarians planned to capture Zhou Hui and defect to Wei, after the plan was leaked, Zhou Hui and Wenyu resisted together, fighting dozens of times in one day, Wenyu charged, but Zhou Hui died in the battle, Wenyu rushed over to retrieve his body, and the enemy did not dare to approach.
After the battle, Wen Yu had nine wounds on his body, and after the wounds healed, he asked to go back to bury Zhou Hui, Chen Qingzhi admired his loyalty and bravery very much, gave him many gifts, and then let him leave.
Zhou Hui conveys the importance of knowledge and courage more effectively by example than by words.
In real life, we often see that children in the family environment whose parents are willing to learn and have the courage to face difficulties often show similar characteristics.
For example, if a child sees that their parents do not give up when faced with difficulties, but actively look for solutions, the child will also learn to maintain an optimistic and positive attitude when encountering problems.
This positive attitude towards life and problem-solving skills will accompany children throughout their lives, whether it is academic challenges or future career difficulties, they will be able to face them bravely, so that they will have more opportunities to realize their self-worth and success.
In a small village in Shandong, there is a student named Chen Lihua.
Because of his own efforts, Chen Lihua was admitted to a key high school in the province. His own IQ and talent are not bad.
In the initial test and the subsequent monthly exam, Chen Lihua's grades were far behind the class average, and he began to doubt himself, feeling that he might not be suitable for such a learning environment.
Chen Lihua's homeroom teacher, Ms. Zhang, is a very attentive and responsible teacher.
He noticed Chen Lihua's situation and decided to take a closer look. After communicating with other subject teachers, Ms. Zhang found that the problem was not Chen Lihua's IQ or learning attitude, but his lack of suitable methods for high school learning.
So, Teacher Zhang found Chen Lihua and began to give him one-on-one guidance after class.
Teacher Zhang did not directly teach him the knowledge in the textbook, but taught him how to study effectively: how to take notes, how to review, how to arrange study time, etc.
Chen Lihua followed Teacher Zhang's method and tried it, and he began to make progress in the exam, and his grades slowly returned to his proper level.
Teacher Zhang's teaching method actually gave Chen Lihua a super useful hint: learning is not rote memorization, but to have a method and know how to learn.
This hint quietly changed Chen Lihua's view of learning.
The hint of teaching according to his aptitude not only helped Chen Lihua get out of the trough of learning, but more importantly, made him understand that he can actually control his learning, as long as he finds a way that suits him.
This kind of confidence and method is more valuable than mere indoctrination.
At school, if you have a child who is particularly good at studying, you will find that gradually the grades of the friends around him will also improve.
Or there is a child who is particularly good at playing basketball, and suddenly all the friends on the basketball court are active, and everyone wants to learn how to shoot basketball.
This is because we all crave to be recognized and want to be better.
When we see someone around us who is doing a good job in something, we take them as role models and unconsciously accept a hint: if I can be like him, maybe I can also be recognized by everyone.
The reason behind this phenomenon is simple – worship and reverence.
We look up to our peers who are outstanding, admire their talents and efforts, and naturally want to move closer to them and imitate their strengths.
Through this adoration and reverence, an atmosphere of active competition and learning is developed among peers.
This hint makes children unconsciously motivated by the excellence around them to become harder and better.
It's like a little story on the basketball court, or a learning group that helps each other and makes progress together.
These are the realistic manifestations of peer worship and admiration, and they make children not alone on the road to growth, but more motivated to move forward.
Really powerful parents, they are like magicians in life, they know how to inadvertently stuff their children with positive energy. They understand that giving children not only material satisfaction, but more importantly, spiritual guidance.
In psychology, people's behavior and emotions are largely influenced by their surroundings.
One: Positive reinforcement is to give rewards or praise when children do well, so that children know that they are doing right.
Two: Negative reinforcement, this sounds a bit scary, but it is actually to encourage children by reducing bad things, such as not having to wash dishes after doing homework.
Three: imitation learning, children are born to imitate masters, see what their parents do, they learn how to do.
4. Emotional connection, establish a deep emotional connection with your child, so that your child feels loved and safe, so that they are more willing to accept positive cues.
Mature parents, they know how to use these psychological tips to send their children positive energy of "you are great, you can do better" all the time in life.
Such children will naturally grow up more confident and motivated to pursue their dreams.
So, if you're a parent, try these tips the next time you're spending time with your kids.
Remember to give your child more positive cues, such as "I believe in you" and "you are doing a great job", these simple words may become a gas station on their life path.
For example, if a child learns to ride a bicycle, even if he falls a few times, don't rush to criticize. Try to give him words of encouragement, such as "It's okay if you fall, it's great for Mom and Dad to see you get up bravely every time!" In this way, children can see hope in failure and learn not to be afraid of difficulties.
Confucius once said:"If you are a threesome, you must have my teacher. ”Whether it's at home, at school, or in interactions with peers, children learn from everyone around them.
Everyone can be their "teacher", both by word and by example.
This kind of learning is not limited to academic knowledge, but more importantly, the wisdom and moral guidance of life.
In this process, positive cues become a beacon for the children's growth, guiding them towards higher goals.
The process of growing up is complex and challenging, but the power of positive cues makes the process hopeful and possible.
It teaches children how to face challenges, how to rise from failure, and how to become a better version of themselves.
Children's growth needs sunshine and rain; Knowledge is needed and wisdom is needed; There is a need for role models and encouragement.
Positive hints are like a beam of light, illuminating their way forward, so that each child can bloom their own unique brilliance in the journey of growth.
Pay attention to me, let the rhythm of words compose the music of life;
"Nightingales leap in the moonlight, their feathers shimmering with silver. Its singing voice was like a wonderful **, which touched my soul deeply. "