Middle-aged is another period of scenery for women.
A philosopher once profoundly pointed out: "The happiness and unhappiness of life often do not come from the turmoil and changes of the outside world, but depend more on how we understand and deal with the attitude of life." ”
I am deeply inspired by this view. In the long river of life, many joys and sufferings are often the result of our own choices and actions.
As a result, some women seem to be favored by fate, and they paint their lives as colorful and full of vitality with their unique life wisdom and positive attitude.
Others, however, seem to be stuck in the quagmire of life, unable to extricate themselves from their predicament and indulge in endless pain, no matter how hard they struggle.
Although the road of life is long and unpredictable, there are actually few key nodes that determine its direction.
For many women, the ultimate misfortune is not simply due to marrying the wrong person, but often begins with three fatal wrong choices that are like a fork in the road at a turning point, leading them to unexpected difficulties in life.
It's easier to be too "smart" and a little confused
In "Dream of Red Mansions", a classic that has been handed down to the world, when it comes to the role of the most intelligent life, Grandma Liu undoubtedly jumps into the hearts of many readers. When she walked into the Grand View Garden again, she encountered the ingenious tricks of Wang Xifeng and Mandarin Ducks.
During the banquet, Sister Feng and Mandarin Duck specially presented Grandma Liu with a pair of heavy chopsticks, and placed a plate of pigeon eggs in front of her.
The pigeon eggs are small and slippery, and the weight of the chopsticks makes Grandma Liu try her best to pick one up, but she accidentally drops it, which makes the guests laugh.
It wasn't until the end of the banquet that Grandma Liu said indifferently to Wang Xifeng: "It's nothing else, I only love your family's bearing." It is in response to the phrase 'courteous everyone'. A few words not only easily resolved this banter, but also made Wang Xifeng and Mandarin Duck deeply sorry and sincerely apologized.
Lao Tzu once had a cloud: "The laity are clear, but I am alone and faint; The laity observe, and I am alone. "Women are delicate by nature, but being too shrewd in life often leads to endless troubles. Many women live a tired life, not because of their dullness, but because of excessive sobriety and transparency.
They can't tolerate the slightest flaw, and they don't know how to back down at the right time, so they suffer a lot of unnecessary suffering. In the world, the more shrewd and calculating, the easier it is to touch the holes of life.
Therefore, a woman who is truly happy is well versed in the wisdom of "pretending to be confused with understanding". They have a clear heart, and although they can perceive some things, they choose to remain silent; For the things in your hands, you can not only hold them tightly, but also let go freely.
As Bai Yansong said: "The two cornerstones of life are to be confused and chic." ”
Women may wish to learn to live with childlike innocence from time to time, embrace that simplicity and purity, and at the same time maintain an ignorant and innocent way of thinking like a child. In this way, it can make the picture of life bloom with a different kind of splendor.
Too much "comparison", live a good life is happier
Ms. Yang Jiang once told a story about a girl.
The girl has always grown up in the arms of her family, and her life is full of carefree and well-fed. The novelties in the home made her feel very happy.
However, one day, when she inadvertently looks at the outside world through the curtains, she is fascinated by the sight in front of her. Those who ran freely aroused endless envy in her heart, and she began to tire of her peaceful life.
Finally, one day, she plucked up the courage to go out of the house, but was surprised to find that the outside world was not as beautiful as she imagined. Those people who seem to be at ease are actually working hard for a living.
The ancients said: "The authorities are confused, and the bystanders are clear." "Many people always lose themselves in the search for happiness. As the years go by, we should understand that everyone has their own dilemmas and challenges, and they also have their own happy times.
We should not use our own standards to measure the lives of others, let alone use filters to beautify the happiness of others. On the road of life, we must learn to let go of the mentality of comparison and cherish everything in front of us.
For middle-aged women, they should learn to be free and easy. Whether it's family or life, as long as we do our best, we should feel fulfilled.
After all, the days belong to you, and what suits you is the best. When we relax our minds and focus on our lives, we will find that those bitterness has unconsciously dissipated and replaced by the beautiful bits and pieces of ordinary life.
I don't know "selfishness", and self-love is happier
A middle-aged single woman, driving an old car bearing the traces of time, embarks on a spiritual journey with no preset end - this is Su Min's unique life chapter. She, as the eldest daughter in the family, shoulders the heavy responsibility of the growth of her three younger brothers, and always adheres to the selfless dedication of her "sister" until she enters the marriage hall.
Under the burden of the family, Su Min did her best to support her younger brothers' studies, subsidize the family, and even work in her own factory for free. However, when she entered her married life with great anticipation, thinking that she would usher in a new chapter of her life, she found herself trapped in another invisible cage.
Like many women in ordinary families, she constantly made compromises and sacrifices for her husband, children and family in her married life, and quietly handled the family chores for thirty years.
What's even more suffocating is that her dedication has not been respected and understood as it should be, but has suffered from the indifference of the AA system and the painful torture of domestic violence in her life.
On an ordinary day in 2019, after a fierce dispute, Su Min screamed to herself in an extreme way, she woke up her sleeping soul with sharp pain, and faced the edge of life and death with a three-knife decision in her chest.
Fortunately, this experience of hitting the rocks did not take her life, but made her deeply realize that only by living for herself can she truly find the meaning of life.
So, 56-year-old Su Min, driving the car purchased with a loan for two years, with only more than 2,000 yuan, set off from Zhengzhou and embarked on this journey of finding himself and embracing freedom. Along the way, she captures the scenery with her camera, carefully edits her memories, records her life with her pen, and shares every story that touches her heart.
The moment she started the engine, the joy of singing welled up in her heart; The moment she grasped the steering wheel, she announced that she had finally mastered the course of her life.
As one writer put it, "Putting your hopes in others often means keeping your disappointments to yourself." "A woman who has lost herself will never be fulfilled in life; And a woman who dares to pursue herself and has a slight "selfish" color can create happy poems in ordinary life.
Faced with the test questions of life, Su Min proved with practical actions: living happily is the right way to solve this problem.
Learning to cherish oneself is undoubtedly an indispensable life topic for every woman. Put self-care at the top of the pyramid of life, firmly trust yourself, respect yourself, rely on yourself, and love yourself affectionately.
There are many people who win the favor of others, and those who can please themselves are kings", this wise saying profoundly reveals the importance of self-love. Loving yourself is the prologue of eternal romance in the long journey of life, and it is the best investment for the rest of your life.
Someone once sighed: "The greatest sorrow of women is not the aging brought about by the passage of time, but the loss of self in the torrent of marriage and ordinary life." ”
Entering middle age, for women, is another magnificent landscape on the picture scroll of life. They have experienced in the baptism of trivial daily life, and they have grown tenaciously in the endless tempering of time. At this moment, they should have the foundation of wisdom and the source of strength to carefully carve the chapter of their lives.
When you are able to hold on to happiness in your hands, no matter how the years change, it will not really make you difficult.
Light up the beacon of attention, and hope that everyone who lives with heart can properly manage their own life, so that the world can respond to your tenacity and love with a gentle attitude.
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