Fang Zhiliang, founder of Responsibility Dynamics.
Everyone knows the concept of "empathy", such as the relationship between A and B, A thinks about what he does from the perspective of B, and B thinks about how he will do it from the perspective of A, which is empathy. But pure "empathy" will not work without grafting some tools.
When we say "I'm sorry", in terms of the language of responsibility, is it high or low? The lower order is not. What I want to say is that my language is not good in Mandarin, which belongs to r2(l) in a certain way, if I use another way of expressing it: thank you very much for your patience in listening to my ......
In this case, I'm thanking you, I'm describing r2(l), I'm thanking you, it means that you are very tolerant, and this is r3.
For example, if you are dating a friend, what do you usually say after you are late for the date? "I'm sorry I'm late. "Everybody basically says that. Your friend will surely reply angrily: "How are you ......"I'm sorry for me! You do it every time! "It's going to make you feel very uncomfortable. In other words, we can actually put it another way: thank you so much for waiting so long. Thank you for your company and wait!
Which of the two is more comfortable? The second is not? Comfortable in**? This method is from the other side's point of view, so where is the mystery of this?
In fact, the mystery lies in this, you say "I'm sorry" is emphasizing your responsibility, but it is precisely this kind of responsibility that is low-level, this is not cheap! There is no doubt that people will inevitably have a low level of responsibility, what will you find at this time? For the same thing, if you are the subject of responsibility, he can also be the subject of responsibility, that is, the two of you can do this thing, and this thing constitutes the subject of responsibility. So we realize that responsibility is actually based on the object.
Let's take a look again, in the past two days, we have been emphasizing "objects", and "objects" constitute the relationship between people, and the so-called "objects" must be a system. With the main body of responsibility, I am doing this thing, and someone must evaluate it. Who will judge? Object of Responsibility. The subject of responsibility and the object of responsibility must be a complete system, and this system is interdependent.
The subject of responsibility is the person being evaluated, and the object of responsibility is the evaluator. Next, we can take some scenarios to train.
Customer service. When will the shipping department be able to deliver on time? ”
Why are customer expectations so high? ”
When exactly will the sales department be able to make no mistakes? ”
Why don't customers read the instructions all the time? ”
Do you think these words are said from the subject of responsibility, or from the object of responsibility?
Object of Responsibility. Look, what language is all of this being spoken? It's all about judging each other. Why are customer expectations so high? I've served so well! "Isn't it? At this time, I have jumped out of the scope of responsibility, I just want to be the object of responsibility, evaluate others, and think that it is the customer's problem. So with four responsibilities, let's take a look at this sentence "When will the transportation department be able to deliver on time?" "Which of the 4r8c is expressed? (People argue with each other).
Now you look at it from a different perspective, and you are now judging him from the point of view of the evaluator. In terms of r1 or r2, if it is around time, it is r1 (-1), and if it is fast and efficient, it is r2 (l). All in all, it's all low-level, right?
Next, "Why are customer expectations so high?" "You're judging the customer in reverse, you know?
Let's say that in an enterprise, the chairman of the board of directors does the work of the general manager, the general manager does the work of the vice president, the vice president does the work of the sales manager, the manager of the sales department does the work of the supervisor, the supervisor does the work of the employees, and the employees do the work of the chairman - to evaluate which person in the company does well and which person does not do well. After this whole circle is misplaced, the people who really want to evaluate are working, and the people who want to work are evaluating, isn't that the case? When exactly will the sales department be able to make no mistakes? ”
Suppose you change the way of thinking now, and you change these words from the perspective of the responsible subject, and you will find that this artistic conception is obviously very different. You say to someone, "Why are you so irresponsible?!" "Your sentence has been exposed, when you often say these things in the company, will it make a good impression? No, it won't.
You change it into the language of the responsible subject, and you will find that - all of a sudden, the realm of perception is very different. Let me remind you when we ask, "Why don't customers read the instructions all the time?" We ask ourselves, in turn, "How can I make sure my customers know how to use it?" "Isn't it the same? In this case, I have regarded the customer as the object of responsibility, and I am the subject of responsibility.
..... in a three-minute panel discussion
Group 1: Student A: The first sentence is "Should we discuss with the transportation department to see where the goods have been delivered?" "We see" when does the transport department deliver? "Obviously, it's a bit of a complaint. Another way of thinking is that if I remind him in the same environment, I will become the subject of responsibility.
The next sentence "Why are customer expectations so high?" "Wouldn't it be better if I could make any improvements, or improvements, to make the customer more satisfied, and to blame the customer?
Participant A: Fourth, "Why don't customers read the instructions all the time?" After the conversion, "What kind of way should we think of to let customers take the initiative to read the instructions themselves?" "It's to help him realize the importance of reading the instruction manual. Good!
For the same question, let's switch to a few other cases. Let's move on, one by one. ..... in a three-minute panel discussion
Group 2: Student B: "Why are our products priced so high?!" "After the conversion", let's talk about how to let customers know why we're pricing so high. ”
You repeat the phrase, "Why are our products priced so high?" "If we say it with an emotion, and you try it again, how do you usually say it? In fact, this is often the case in our lives.
Participant C: "Why do customers say that our products are priced high, and how do we make them understand that our products are priced high?" "That emotion wasn't enough. In fact, just imitate the first sentence.
Student D: "Why are our products priced so high?" ”
Is this a question? In fact, in the company, the general sales manager goes to the headquarters for a meeting, and when it comes to the product promotion meeting, all the situations are like this: "Why are our products priced so high?!" "Isn't it? That's the first reaction, so is it still worth it? The directors above you are all in this evaluation language, which means that your emotions will definitely bring back to your leadership, and the Chinese do not have a saying: there are policies above, and there are countermeasures below. So this language, I hope that everyone will use low-level language to imitate this now, imitate more, in fact, there are many times in life that this kind of scene, but not in a different way, object and phenomenon.
Student E: "Our products are priced high, so how can we promote the advantages of our products to customers so that they can be more easily accepted?" ”
Student F: "We should go and analyze the reasons for the high price of the product, and then move on to the ......."”
Student G: "Our product is so good in the first point and so good in the second point, so how much do you think our product should be worth?" ”
This is not particularly in place, and there is no sense of responsibility. It's accusation, it's as simple as that, we have to turn accusation into a way to blame ourselves. When I am accusing, it means that we stand in the perspective of the evaluation of the object of responsibility, that is, the evaluator of responsibility, but there is no difference between saying one sentence and saying a hundred words about this kind of thing, but it creates a negative and bad team impact.
Student H: "Why is our product so expensive compared to other products?" ”
Participant I: "How do you get our customers to accept such a high price?" ”
This is not the responsibility of the subject-object transformation, but the problem has changed, and you have to jump out of this box. In this way, let me tell you a little story first: there are two children who want to grow up to be **, and the teacher asks them: "Why do you grow up to be **?" The first child said: "When there are many security guards in the future, I can manage many, many people!" The teacher smiled. The second child said: "I want to lead the people to a well-off society through my hard work." The teacher said, "You're awesome!" ”
In the same **position, these two children, the difference between the children in front and the children in the back**? Everyone didn't say it, but there must be a difference in this, and the difference is in **? A: One is R4(C) and one is R4(C).
In fact, everyone has already started to switch, but not yet. In fact, from the perspective of 4R8C, one of them is from the perspective of R4 (C) and the other is from the perspective of R4 (C). The previous child is standing in the position of thinking about the object of responsibility, that is, how can I do it, like we are subordinates, they are working, you are managing, you are the object of responsibility; If you are working and your superiors evaluate you, then you are the subject of responsibility. The first two children, the first child is responsible for object thinking, and the second child is to lead the people to a well-off life through my efforts, is it completely different? Because it is responsible for the subject thinking. So after you listen to it, you feel that this child is more responsible.
The subject and object of responsibility are hidden in us, according to what we used to talk about is "empathy", and if empathy is not built on this basis, it is difficult for you to really understand how to empathize. It's when you go low-level and then switch to a high-level. Let's say we're listening to a lecture right now, and you're a little sleepy and you're sitting in front of you in the afternoon, let's say you're dozing off and you accidentally knock over a glass of water or knock something off. So if as a teacher, it's normal to criticize you, if I change the way and I "break things" in a way that makes you feel very happy, do you know how to switch between this?
You snapped a glass, which means that you dozed off in class! It's r1(-1). But if I use a quick switch of subject and object of responsibility, I go the other way: "Oops, I taught this lesson so well, you see, you listened so excitedly that you knocked over the cup." "Immediately changed to a different state.
That is, you have to stand in the perspective of the main body of responsibility, at this time, you don't want to be entangled in a small problem, immediately switch to my high-level thinking method to make up for your r1 (-1), you will remember me for a lifetime! People are like that. This is called the transformation of subject and object of responsibility. Okay, let's go back to the case and try again.
Student J - "How do we give full play to the advantages of our products so that consumers understand that the price is so high?" ”
That is to say, there is no way to change this high-end product, and we have to come up with some of our own how to make it clear, right? Good!
Participant K – "Our products are great, so we sell them at a very high price." Everyone's job is to sell the product, and now we have to discuss how to do it? ”
Student L - "Our products are the best in the world, what kind of better experience will we bring to customers?" ”
This is good! Let's think about it, pretending that when we were holding a product seminar, we discussed "Why is the ** of our product so high?!" "Now there are five people who say that. And then what? Xiao Cai said alone: "We should think about how we can do some work on top of this price for customers to buy." "Isn't it? In this scenario, there are five people who say this, and you say this and give the host a round. It's exactly the same as in our lives. The pricing of the product is the same, and we have to look at how to solve the problem from our own point of view. Do you understand?
What it means is that in full accordance with the thinking of the responsible subject, we will see which plans are good to sell next, and at the same time? I deliberately used this method, but I actually introduced a situation like this, because that's how most people see things. The more executives are together, the more they will say directly: "Why is the ** of our product so high?!" "Understand? If you go to such a meeting, you will find that you are actually creating internal contradictions. At this time, an R3 person came out and said, "This brother, there are some personal things that we drink in private and say, we are in a meeting now, so it won't be too long!" "At this time, you will find that in fact, you are using the thinking of the responsible subject, and you have taken away the problem, and second? Embody your high wind and bright festival. In fact, at this time, the boss saw that this Xiao Cai was too good and helped us resolve the embarrassment. Is it resolved? Good! Let's move on to the second sentence.
Student M – "Other people's wholesale prices are lower than ours, so our products can't be sold!" "Here's how I switched" Our wholesale price is higher than others, how can we sell the product? ”
The answer is correct. (Applause) Do you understand this time? Why do you understand? Because of the positive and negative ratio of language, the brain signals will come over as soon as possible! Next, first use the language of your responsible object to imitate and perform, and then change it to the language of the responsible subject to compare.
Participant N – "When will we be more competitive?" After the conversion, it is, "We need to think about how can our products be more competitive?" ”
Right. (Applause) So be it. I think that at this time, you should use the form of performance to express your emotions and anger in the object language of responsibility.
Participant A - "When will we be more competitive?!" ”
Let's discuss how to make our products more competitive? (applause, laughter).
Isn't it a lot? Is it okay to imitate it together? You know, in all kinds of local scenes, there are often such things, and we have to train to reduce this problem. We're going to take pictures of all seven questions one by one, look at them for ourselves in these two ways, and figure out these two styles when we go back.
Participant B – "Why doesn't the customer pick me up**?"
I should change the time, or communicate the time with the customer, so that the customer can answer my ** more easily.
Participant C – "Why doesn't the customer pick me up**?" How? ”
Should I change the time, or send a text message in advance or something, so that the customer can't always receive me**. Applause, laughter) Yes, it's in the groove now! The tone is enough, and I have to do it again.
Participant D – "Why doesn't the marketing department provide more appealing promotional materials?!" ”
What can our marketing department do to create a more appealing promotional product? "Again, add your body language.
Trainee E - "What's going on in your marketing department?" Why not provide more appealing promotional supplies?! ”
What should our marketing department do to provide more attractive promotional materials? (Applause).
The language behind you still can't reflect the transformation of the language of the responsible subject, think about it again.
Participant F - "What are you doing every day?!" When are you going to be able to provide more attractive promotional materials?! ”
Dear colleagues, should we expand some channels, track customers, and then improve our own brand to achieve a high market competitiveness? (Applause).
See? Don't be in a hurry, you know? In fact, these are two changes, I just want to let you reproduce the scene, let you see the previous kind of reprimand, why the internal management of the enterprise is very poor. It's not just the thinking of the object of responsibility, but also the low-level simplicity and crudeness of your body language. Next, when you want to change the responsible subject, not only will you have to change the perspective of the responsible subject, but your language will also follow your brain and make high-level actions. Isn't it that we've started to have a transition, and by the time we get to the point where our language is presented, your body language is keeping up with your brain.
Student G - "Why can't your manufacturing department make products that sell as well as others?!" ”
What's the difference between our products? Let's study and research, how can we do better? ”
Yes, yes, but it's still a little bit inappropriate, it's okay, let's take a five-minute break.
Vignette: Mr. Liu took the stage to share 4R8C].
Fang: Please Mr. Liu come up and use 4R8C to evaluate the mobile phone.
Liu: I listened to Mr. Fang's class a few days ago, this course is very profound, it is not something that can be learned in a day or two, Principal Wu has studied for three months, but through a simple matter, I will tell you, it seems that I can learn some of it. Employees play mobile phones at work, and in this case, if the leader sees employees playing with mobile phones, they can help each other. Let's start with R1: (-1) a fine of 100, (0) don't affect your performance because of playing with your mobile phone, and abide by some rules and regulations; R2 can be said that (l) you still play with your mobile phone with such a poor performance, (n) your performance is so good, do you do it with a mobile phone, I support him more; Use r3 to say (+1) to protect the eyes, don't get too close; (0) I will not see it, and I will get it; I told him in the r4 way: (c) you can do so well through your mobile phone through the Internet, (c) you play with your mobile phone away from me, I'm afraid of radiation. Thank you!
Fang: I admire Mr. Liu very much, I read his diary, and he drew a diagram of the 4R for analysis. Applauds and encourages Mr. Liu's learning spirit. We can do this as long as we keep training. Okay, let's get back to homework. I want to emphasize one place, a person performs, from the content of the object of responsibility accusation plus emojis, that is, body language, and then use the language of the subject of responsibility plus emojis, okay, 257 come.
257: **inaudible), and then, the investor *** can't convey our company's *** well
I want to see the real you. The body language is enriched, but the content of the speech is not clearly expressed.
Responsibility object language) you rob me, why can't your IQ be like others;
How should we do it, do it like they do.
I wondered, why can't we make a product that sells as well as others, and laughs.
The other way: (responsible subject language) we have to think about why we can't make products as good as others, we have to think about how we can make products as good as others. If you look at people, we just have to work harder and learn more, and strive to make better products next time, okay.
At critical moments, leaders should be responsible, so that employees can turn grief into strength.
The last group: the second one, others give us the difference, I am an employee: leader, you see what kind of thing we are, ** higher than others, what's the problem, you talk to people and customers, people and customers don't do it when they hear it;
Change position: In response to this problem, let me talk about the advantages of our software.
I. II. 、......
Next we have to have difficulty, you can use the language of r1, you can also use the language of r2, you can also rise to r3 language expression, you can also rise to r4 language, and then further in the 4r8c of the responsible subject, the 4r8c performance of the responsibility object, don't worry, I began to divide, a total of nine, this time I have to have requirements, you must first choose the language of r1 or r2, r3, r4, the topic is 1234567Who's r3 down?
1. Why don't salespeople want to listen to the password and make requests? (Show it out).
2. When will they learn the right product?
3. Why did they ask us to do this without communicating well in advance?
1. Why do young people have low eyes? 2. When can I find the right talent? 3. Why don't they take the initiative? 4. Whose fault is this? 5. Why don't they always come to work on time? 6. When will they understand that I am doing this for their good? You have to translate the language of the responsible subject, as you like.
Whose fault is this? This is the language of accusation. (a large paragraph is inaudible) let's cut back the train of thought first, and let it go for a while. The first is serious, if I want to say that earnestness is not equal to performance, can you understand what it means (that is, no matter how serious I am, I can't do performance; What I understand is that without the right choice, you will not achieve the desired goal; Everyone already knows, this is r (discussion, and then shouting r2 more), many times in our life, many titles are not clearly expressed, such as earnest is not equal to performance, just want to tell you to work hard, so it is called r2, that is, r1 (0) r2 (n). Tell you that in every 4R8C, each of him has his unique things, let's take a look: opportunistic, performance is not the same as opportunism, in fact, it is R2(N) R4(C); And opportunism is not equal to illegal operation, what is this, r4(c) r1(-1); In particular, I need to tell you that many times we like to play side ball, in fact, it is r4(c) who is doing the blame, and he does not have r1(-1) because what methods do managers sometimes use to employees? His r4(c) is not something I'm desperate to think of as r1(-1) and it's a small problem, and it makes him even bigger. That's why we call responsible thinking rationality. Illegal operation is not the same as helping the customer, why, he made a r3 (+1) but at the same time made an r1 (-1), we write it down, helping the customer is not equal to the principle (also the rule) tells you r3 (+1) r1 (-1); We have to use higher-order thinking, unprincipled does not mean that you will love Dafei, love Dafei does not mean that you can be lazy, it does not mean that you can perform badly. Next, we will express it in the language of the responsible subject.
: We chose the fourth one, whose fault is it, using r1 to indicate that the rules and regulations were set by me, and the employee violated the rules, but I did not have a clear propaganda that I should improve my position.
A: Why aren't you wearing overalls?
B: I don't know.
A: Didn't anyone tell you?
B: No.
C: This may be my mistake, I didn't tell you about wearing overalls, this is my mistake, I will repeat to you, the company must wear formal clothes in the future.
A: Our topic is why not be proactive. Okay, let's put on a show.
A: Didn't teach you, why don't you take the initiative?
Then we convert a method, we use both r1(0) and r1(-1). r1(-1Do you have any grievances in your heart that affect your motivation? r1(0): Are we going to introduce an incentive plan to mobilize their enthusiasm?
Group 3: (When will the right talent be found).
Come, how long have you been here, it's been a whole month since I gave you, and I can't recruit anyone, what's going on? Conversion: As the manager of the human resources department, there is indeed a reason why I can't recruit people, so then as the human resources department, we must increase the amount of network push, talk about two or three more companies to do recruitment work with us, and at the same time we also invite colleagues from other departments to help us recruit people. If we successfully recruit a person, we will give a reward of 200 yuan. Of course, we also propose that there will be a recruitment template in the future, and we hope that all employees of the company can help us do this.
A: We are making logos, and we are talking about this problem from different angles of R1, R2, R3, and R4
The first: we don't have to do it if they don't communicate it in advance;
We are such an excellent team, we do our job well;
Let's talk to them about what we should do.
They do well, and we will do even better, because what we do now will go into the history of our company and will create miracles for the company.
b；What is the situation of you, more than 20 working days a month, late every day, late every day, whether you can do it, whether you want to be good;
With r1+r2) I read this attendance sheet today, you have often been late this month, first of all, our system is here, we have to be fined if you are late, it is also a burden for you, and then we see that you are nine o'clock, not all eight 31, you get up 5 minutes early every day, you can have breakfast, and it is good for your body.
C: Chen Zhongyi, if you come over to me, when will your team understand that I am doing this for their good? ** Change) loyalty, you look at it may be ......
D: I wondered if the sales staff in this state was why we didn't consider our scope of competence before making a request? It's not realistic at all, something. In fact, we should give them the scope of our ability and let them make requests according to the scope of our ability, understand.
r3(+1)) Xiaoshi, you remember, we should improve our ability range, so that our sales staff in the front line to get better products, can put forward more requirements for us, because the better our products do, it also means that our ability is greater, we can also create better products for our sales staff to sell better, understand, next time work hard, or not to deduct your money.
R4(c)) That's good, Xiaoshi remembered, we need to supplement our knowledge, improve our capabilities, contribute to the prosperity of our company, and let our sales staff make more demands, understand.
The teacher intervened: Xiaoshi, we want to ...... for the future of our CMA CGM and for the performance of our CMA CGM
e: We're talking about the young man's eye and the high hand is low, r1 (-1) has the eye and the hand is low, unruly, be careful I fire you.
Teacher Fang: Wait a minute, (find the problem: do you know why I let everyone evolve here, I found that I spent a long time to put the complete set of procedures I wanted and your process of this change, first I asked you to come up is to use the language of the object of responsibility plus emojis, such as: why are you always so high-minded, and then switch to us as the main body of responsibility, such as: young people, they may not be self-disciplined enough, may be a little exaggerated, then How should we understand this issue at this stage......(This is one of them).
E: Young people are inevitably high-eyed, but you must follow the rules and take your time -== This is r1(0).
r2(l): Young people have low eyes and skills but can't do the minimum, they are not qualified, and they can't do it;
r2(n): We young people have low eyes, we must work hard in the direction we think, the biggest direction, so that we can come out;
Dating scenes:
Xiao Zhang: I'm sorry, I'm late for a date; Thank you for being patient with me and don't say I'm sorry, I'm not always late;
The conversation ended with a thank you for listening, not sorry, I was just messing around.
When you delay other people's time, say thank you for taking the time to spend with me, don't say sorry, I'm too procrastinating;
When you lose your temper for no reason, say thank you for your understanding, don't say sorry, I just said goodbye, I'm unreasonable;
When people encourage you, say thank you for always expecting me, don't say sorry, I'm always disappointed.
These are all in different field contracts, with time as a reference, and the characters switch between the subject of responsibility and the language of the object of responsibility. In this place, we say that many times the salesperson is visiting customers, there are two things that will have problems before and after, one is that they may be late when they meet, and the other is when they break up, they have talked for a long time before, but when they break up, they will say: Left, delayed you for a long time, I should say: Thank you, thank you, I had a great time chatting with you today, I tasted a lot of things, and I will come to ...... with you next time
Set the stage for the next time. Of course, this kind of learning can't be learned in one class or an hour, and the next time you encounter such a situation, after you finish speaking, you can immediately realize why I said such things again, and you will subjectively recognize and try to change, remind everyone not to not speak, not to transition obsessive-compulsive disorder, and force yourself; When you lose your temper for some reason, don't keep thinking about your own low level, but restore yourself from the subject of responsibility to the object of responsibility, and then we have to think about how you convert when a customer appears at a low level. For example, if you make an appointment with a client and make an appointment at two o'clock, but he doesn't arrive at three o'clock and arrives at half past three, what do you say, we ask that we must not say that it is your low-level, we must convert it to my high-level to solve your low-level problem.