Getting along with the sexes is a way to make love last

Mondo Psychological Updated on 2024-02-27

If life is only as it first seems, everyone is a new world. When a loving soul is willing to open up and connect with another person, it may be a simple glance, a warm look and smile, a light-hearted humor, or an affectionate and touching confession, in a variety of ways, and may be moved by another person.

Because everyone has a unique soul in addition to the skin, but this soul is very different because of the different spiritual core and the acquired growth experience, but no matter what it is, as long as you observe carefully and feel it with your heart, there will always be something about this person that will attract you and make you happy, and gradually, love will arise.

It is said that love has a shelf life, some say it is three months, some say it is six months, and there are official studies that confirm that it is eighteen months. The infinity of time brings the infinity of answers. This kind of topic without a single answer has always sparked all kinds of speculation and discussions, just as the Internet will introduce the compatibility between men and women of different zodiac signs, and the answer that cannot be scientifically proven will always cause heated discussions.

Zhou Guoping once said that the meaning of life is unsolvable, and the advantage of love is that people do not seek to solve this problem. In the final analysis, it is because the happiness brought by love is beautiful enough that it often makes those who are immersed in it afraid of losing. How to make love last for a long time is a problem that the world has been exploring, in fact, the most important point in the way is to hide and not to be revealed.

Reduce communication. Some people say that the infinite desire to share is what love looks like. Therefore, many people want to talk more and get closer to each other, and that kind of intimacy of not saying anything makes two people who were once lonely have a lot of warmth. It's in everyone's nature to want to be heard, and when one person can be listened to intently by another, it means to be recognized and liked. Therefore, in the early days of getting along with the sexes, most people will have a lot to say, and the topics of communication will change with the deepening of the relationship, and the usual development direction is closer and closer to personal privacy.

If two people have not been in contact with each other for a long time, and there are some strangers or misunderstandings between each other, it is very good to have an in-depth communication, which is an effective communication and can enhance each other's feelings. But if you have to have some informative and sharing communication every day or three days, after a long time, one party will definitely feel vaguely uncomfortable, or even a kind of mental torture.

And people who like to chat, or regard communication as a prescribed action of love, will be happy to talk without words, as if the decrease in communication means the weakening of feelings. This not only causes psychological pressure on the other party, but also weakens the sense of mystery of each other due to constant chatting. Passion is indispensable in love, it is the inner flame that ignites our lives, but unrestrained communication is constantly consuming the oxygen that keeps the flame of passion burning, and over time, each other will inadvertently feel the retreat of passion.

In fact, there is an upper limit to the communication content of two people, but because the original familiarity of two people and the content stock of one person is different, the upper limit is high and low. Therefore, if you want to maintain enthusiasm, you must hide it and reduce communication.

Reduces pain. Some people say that where there is love, there is pain. The taste of love is mixed, especially the feeling of pain. Just like those golden song love songs that have been proven by time, almost all of them are painful and sad, as if there is no love without pain. Indeed, pain can make us calm down and feel our hearts, and those thoughts in the dead of night seem more and more affectionate and intense. When it is painful, people often forget what their original intention was when they entered the temple of love, is it for pain?

There are so many situations that bring pain in love. Some are brought about by the external environment, such as the pain caused by the distance of a long-distance relationship, such as a relationship that is not accepted by the world or blessed by the people around them, and so on. Although it is said that "the love is separated by mountains and seas, and the mountains and seas can be flat", we are mortal beings in the flesh, and we are social beings, and we need to return to reason and reality. Therefore, in the face of this kind of objective obstacles in love, what we can do is to try to solve the problem, and at the same time, calmly accept that time helps us refine love, or helps us eliminate love.

There are also subjective ones, such as the thoughts brought about by temporary separation, such as the entanglement of who has the initiative in the relationship, such as the difference in the expression of love, and so on. The pain in this relationship mainly stems from the expectation of the other person, everyone has their own way of life, expression, and behavior, and the initial attraction will make people feel understood and understood, and it is normal to have expectations for the other person at this time.

For example, when you miss each other, you want to receive each other's messages, ** or appear directly in front of you, such as when you miss each other, you want to receive each other's gifts, red envelopes or romantic surprises, etc. These seemingly reasonable expectations will bring greater or lesser disappointments in a long period of time. Therefore, if you want to make love last, you must refrain from it, reduce your expectations and requirements for each other, and reduce internal friction and pain.

Elevate yourself. Love arises from mutual attraction. In psychology, there is the "law of mutual pleasure", which means that when we like each other from the bottom of our hearts, our positive emotions will be expressed through various non-verbal behaviors, which can make the other person feel respected and valued, so that the other person also likes us. This suggests that people's liking for others can sometimes be based solely on feedback on their feelings.

Long-term love must not only rely on the initial attraction and feedback to maintain, when the initial attention, the sense of happiness and vanity that is liked retreats, everyone will give birth to an invisible ruler in their hearts, seemingly not deliberately, but will subconsciously measure the value of the other party in their hearts, but different people's measurement standards are different, and various characteristics are different in everyone's hearts. With the development of society and the pluralism of thoughts, the evaluation criteria for excellence are becoming more and more homogeneous, and there is no longer such a clear boundary.

If you want to keep your love lasting for a long time, you need to work hard to improve yourself and let yourself continue to grow and mature. It is very important for a person to have the maturity of his mind, to have the ability to think independently, to have the true temperament to dare to love and hate, to have the tenacity to bend and stretch, and to have the ability to make himself and others happy. Love will only flow to those who do not lack love. When we are spiritually rich, we have the ability to love and warm others;When we are deprived of our hearts and want to ask for love from others, we are like hungry gluttony at that time, and the final result is bound to be the cessation of love. Because no one's love can be so rich that it doesn't need supplies, and it can give infinitely.

Concealing but not sending, reducing communication, reducing pain, and improving oneself is what we must learn in love, and when we learn to manage wisely and cultivate ourselves in love, we can better enjoy the happiness of love.

I am a big-eyed libra, focusing on emotional words, using warm and rational words to enrich the days when you want to be right and wrong, love your persistent appearance, and wish you had light in your eyes and a direction in love. Like my text, remember to follow my Baijia number: Big Eyes Libra].

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