Between the ages of 2 and 7, children's imagination is like a fountain without switches, and all kinds of wonderful ideas are emerging anytime and anywhere. In their little heads, the sun can be green, and small fish may fly in the sky. This innocent imagination, although it makes people feel warm and joyful, sometimes it also brings some small misunderstandings. For example, when children tell adults about their imaginations as if they were really happening, it can confuse and even worry adults.
Let me tell you a story about a 3-year-old boy named Tong Tong. Tong Tong doesn't like to go to kindergarten very much, and every time he arrives at the kindergarten gate, he always cries. One day, he came home and told his mother that the teacher had given him pills. As soon as these words came out, my mother immediately became nervous, because she had heard that some bad kindergartens would do this kind of thing. Mom hurriedly asked, "When will the medicine be given?" Isn't it before a nap? Tong Tong's immature voice replied, "Yes, before napping." The mother asked, "Is it for those noisy children?" Tong Tong nodded: "Yes, whoever is disobedient will be given food." ”
My mother was so angry that she immediately called the doctor and lawyer, and contacted other parents, preparing to go to the kindergarten together the next day to ask for clarification. The kindergarten is not vegetarian either, so they immediately launched an investigation, but they checked the surveillance, asked the teacher and other children, and said that there was no such thing. In the end, the kindergarten told the mother that what Tong Tong said did not exist.
My mother was not convinced, so she decided to call the police, and she also posted on Moments everywhere to make things bigger. But a few days later, the police and the education bureau said that no evidence could be found, and the matter was closed. Later, a parent found out that the passage that Tong Tong said may have been that he watched a cartoon, and there was a plot in which the mother bear fed the baby bear medicine, and he may have taken the plot in the cartoon as his own experience.
There is actually learning behind this little episode. Between the ages of 2 and 7, children's brains are different from those of adults, and their sense of the boundaries between imagination and reality is not so clear. Just like Tong Tong, after watching the cartoon, he may really feel that he is the baby bear who was fed medicine. This situation has a special name in psychology, called "imaginary lying". But that's not a lie, at least that's what the kids themselves think. In this way, they express their imagination and sometimes their emotions and needs.
For adults, it may be startled or even angry to hear such a story at first. But in fact, this is also an interesting phenomenon in the process of children's growth. They do not do this with the intention of deceiving anyone, but because their imagination is so rich that sometimes even they cannot tell what is real and what is imaginary.
So, as parents, what should we do in the face of this "imaginary lying" of our children?
First of all, don't rush to get angry or blame your child, because it may just be that they are exploring the world in their own way.
Understand and motivate: Try to understand the child's thoughts behind it. For example, a child may not like to go to kindergarten, so he imagines a story such as a teacher feeding him medicine. As parents, we can communicate more with our children to understand why they have such imaginations, whether it is because the kindergarten is unhappy, or if something scares them.
Distinguish between imagination and reality: Educate children to learn to distinguish between imagination and reality. This doesn't need to be too serious, it can be used as a game or story to tell them what is real and what is imaginary. For example, you could watch the cartoon that made him imagine a story and tell him, "Look, it's just a story in an animation, not in reality." ”
Avoid leading questions: When asking your child about things, try to avoid questions that will lead your child's imagination. For example, don't ask, "Did the teacher give you medicine?" Such a question, because it may allow the child to follow your guidance to imagine. Instead, use open-ended questions, such as "What interesting thing happened in kindergarten today?" ”
Co-creation and play: Play some creative games with your child, such as storytelling solitaire, or draw together, so that your child's imagination can be used reasonably. This not only satisfies their need for imagination, but also teaches them how to distinguish between reality and fiction in the game.
Overall, the world of children is full of fantasy and imagination, which is their unique way of growing up. As parents, our task is not to stop this development of imagination, but to guide them to learn how to switch between imagination and reality, and to understand the difference between the two. Through patient communication, shared play, and proper education, we can help children grow up healthy and let their imagination be a key to understanding the world, rather than a source of misunderstanding and conflict.