In China, the bride price is a traditional marriage custom, although many people in modern society oppose the bride price, believing that the concept of equality between men and women should not require a bride price, but in fact, the bride price is still a necessary guarantee in many cases. After all, the woman's childbirth and work will be affected, and the man's love and commitment can also be reflected through the bride price.
So, for the case of second marriage, how to deal with the bride price? Most men will think that since they have been married for the second time, they still need a bride price. However, the woman believes that the first marriage has failed, and the second marriage needs to be more cautious, and the bride price can be used as a way to test her status in the hearts of men.
I am 38 years old this year, I have been divorced once, because of the domestic violence of my ex-husband, I chose to divorce and rely on my son for my life.
Although divorced and with a son, I have a formal job and can support myself and my children, and life is not a problem.
Although I am almost 40 years old, I am well maintained, I am not bound by marriage, my complexion is better, everyone says I look like I am in my early 30s.
Therefore, there are still people who pursue me, but I personally adhere to the principle of preferring lack to abundance, and want to find a like-minded person for the rest of my life.
Not long ago, I met a 45-year-old single man who was a well-mannered university lecturer who was middle-aged and widowed and had a daughter who was married.
The two of us fell in love, and soon reached the point of getting married, and when talking about marriage, I put forward a condition: the man needs to pay a bride price of 100,000 yuan.
Unexpectedly, he categorically rejected this possible marriage.
To me, he seems to be too stingy, but the other party has his own considerations.
He believes that the risk of taking on the responsibility of raising a child who has nothing to do with his blood is unpredictable, as if he is feeding a beast that may back.
He admitted frankly that he has rich experience in reading people, and he is by no means a miser. He explained that even if they are their own flesh and blood, they may not be able to guarantee their filial piety in the future, let alone someone else's children.
The 100,000 yuan bride price I proposed seemed to him to be a kind of persecution, making him feel that he had been driven to a dead end.
He thinks that using the 100,000 yuan to marry me and help raise other people's children may end up in vain.
Therefore, he resolutely refused the request, and said that he would rather keep the money in the bank safely and plan for his old age than to take the risk of not being secure.
His attitude was firm and clear: he would rather choose Ziran alone than take on this vague responsibility.
Faced with such a situation, I found it incomprehensible, after all, he knew that I had a son from the beginning, and I didn't hide it.
If it's unacceptable, why start? I couldn't help but question him, but he said that I should send my son back to my ex-husband, and he still liked and satisfied me.
I directly rejected his unreasonable request, my ex-husband has already remarried, has a new family and children, he can't care about my son anymore, I can't watch him suffer.
People say, am I doing the right thing?
Regardless of the first marriage or second marriage, the bride price is a custom, if you don't want to give the bride price, find someone who doesn't want a bride price, how simple. At the end of the day, you don't like her much, so you don't think it's worth it and don't want to give it. If you meet someone who haunts your soul and your heart is empty when you don't see it for a moment, see if you are willing to give it!