In the workplace, you often hear all kinds of complaints, which are nothing more than your own needs are not being met:
For example, after working for many years, I can't get promoted, I haven't received much salary increase, I haven't been rated as advanced and excellent, or I often say that I quit my job.
However, if you observe their usual performance, you will find that they always behave very well-behaved, very docile, and very conscious in front of the leader, and will never ask the leader what they want or demand.
In front of leaders and colleagues, they always love their jobs, work hard, and even rush to work and work overtime.
In private, they will complain to their so-called colleagues and girlfriends that they work too much overtime, have low pay, want to leave, and so on.
As a professional for many years, I have seen a lot of such people, and I understand but do not sympathize with their behavior.
The psychology of them doing this can be roughly analyzed for three reasons:
One is to want to stand on the moral high ground, and want to get things that look tacky, "money, fame, power, and position", which in layman's terms is "standing and standing", pretending to be high, but in fact it is hypocritical. What others give, not what they want, seems to be more noble in soul than the colleague who "fights".
The second is always trying to leave a false impression of "docile obedience" to leaders and colleagues, to be honest, how many leaders are veteran in the workplace, and a "little kitten" and "little sheep" may not be able to deceive them. Besides, isn't there the old saying "rabbits bite when they're in a hurry".
The third is the result of school and family education since childhood, everyone knows the truth that "crying children have milk to drink", but a newborn child knows: if crying can't get the result he wants, then he still doesn't cry. Or they are worried that they will not be able to hold their face if they cry and be rejected, and they will feel uncomfortable.
So choose not to cry or talk, and think that it is a safe strategy.
The essence of the workplace is nothing more than a place where interests and values are exchanged.
Children know how to use crying to express their needs, if you don't cry, if you don't speak, who will take the initiative to understand your needs?
There will be no one else but yourself, don't expect your direct leader to promote you, and she will hang up herself.
The so-called moral purity, worrying about rejection, worrying that he is asking too much, is just adding drama to himself in his heart.
Whether you want to put forward your own needs with the leader, the important thing is whether your needs are reasonable.
The so-called reasonable, you have to look at it from the perspective of the company and the leadership, not from your own perspective.
Of course, you should be very aware that nothing is free in the workplace, and you will need your things in exchange in the future.
For example, if you are given a promotion and a raise, then it will inevitably be exchanged for greater responsibility, higher requirements and more time commitment.
What you see is your past contributions and efforts, while the company and leaders look at your future efforts and dedication.
If these have been thought through, then boldly ask the leader for a suitable time, it is better than complaining every day.
Finally, I would like to give you 5 tips for your reference.
1. Before making a request, the most important thing is to think clearly. Think about why you want to make this request, and ask yourself more about your heart, when you are alone. If you are sure that you want to make a request, then what you might pay for it or what the worst outcome would be if you were denied, think clearly.
Second, grasp the timing and occasion of the request. For example, if you have just excelled in a certain work task, and the leader has been praised by your superiors, you are in a good mood, and you have a good impression of you, you can consider it. It's not a good time to make demands when your boss is in a bad mood or your work is mediocre.
3. When making requests, they should be straightforward and have a reasonable factual basis. Each request comes with 2 or 3 reasonable reasons why you deserve what you are asking for. You can write it down yourself in advance to straighten out your thoughts.
Fourth, certain communication and negotiation skills are required. For example, consider using the negotiation technique of established facts to express your needs in a statement tone.
5. Distinguish between what your leaders and their colleagues like and dislike about you and getting what you deserve. If you ask for what you deserve in an appropriate way, but your leadership colleagues suddenly don't like you because of it, then that person used to like you by pretending.
People who genuinely like you are always happy that you are getting what you deserve.
Workplace