The more sober and rational a person is, the more difficult it is to take the step of getting married.
It takes some impulse to find out that getting married.
My sister is 30 years old, single, and is not pursuing a relationship and does not want to get married. The family is very anxious about this, and every holiday will introduce her to some blind dates. Although she would cooperate to meet and eat, none of them ended up with her fancy. It's not that she's picky, it's that she's observant. 
After a meeting and conversation, she is usually able to accurately judge the true character and motives of the other person. On the other hand, the other party can immediately perceive that she is not the kind of person who is easy to grasp. Over the years, she has met at least seven or eight blind dates, but she has not found a suitable one. Some of them participate in blind dates just to cope with the pressure of their families; Others just want to find a partner to live with, whether they like it or not, as long as they can get along with each other. Others didn't even know why they were participating in the blind date before they met. In short, no one really strives for an unknown relationship. She said: "I don't want to wronged myself to live the kind of marriage without love and material security. The days ahead are long, with car loans, mortgages, children, parents, trivial matters, etc., which can become a burden on marriage. Love and money are indispensable, and I am not willing to compromise. Despite criticism that she was too realistic, she stuck to her principles.
Perhaps as people get older, people start to be more realistic. We have come to realize that affection is a mutually beneficial relationship. Everyone weighs the pros and cons and makes trade-offs. Even from the very beginning, both sides put each other on the heart"**"Label. We think about how much time it's worth spending chatting with the other person, how much money it's worth spending to please the other person, and how much energy it's worth spending on maintaining a relationship. 
Once we put more time and effort into each other than expected, we will decisively stop investing. After all, we're all adults and no longer chasing things that are glamorous and fruitless, we just want to be able to get a real relationship. When a person becomes too conscious, it is difficult to really get into a relationship, and this is true for love, and even more so for marriage. Because love only needs to consider whether you like it or not, while marriage needs to consider whether it is suitable, stable, and long-lasting. When we think too much and are too sober, we find that getting married may not be as worthwhile as we expect.
I received a message in the background about a girl who had been in a six-year relationship and finally chose to break up when she was about to get married. The reason is that the man previously promised to pay a bride price of 60,000 yuan when he got married and pay a down payment on the house, after which the two would repay the loan together. 
However, when preparing to look at the house, the boy said that he could only choose to pay one of them, and the other would wait until he got married. The controversy sparked a heated quarrel. Girls think that boys are not trustworthy and have no word for themselves; The boy, on the other hand, thinks that the girl is too materialistic and does not understand his family's plight. In the end, the two sides broke up unhappily, and the six-year relationship disappeared. Some people talk about her behind her back, thinking that if you really have feelings, you shouldn't choose to break up because of money; Some people also persuaded her in person, don't think about it so much first, and get married first. However, after much deliberation, she chose to let go. Because she is unwilling to give the rest of her life to a man who both does not keep his promises and blames her for loving wealth. Especially after marriage, she will face endless psychological burdens, noisy quarrels, endless conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and trivial housework, which are exhausting to think about. She did not have the confidence to go through the ups and downs of her life with such a man. Instead of walking into marriage with distrust and insecurity, it is better to let go early and give each other a chance to start over.
When a person truly recognizes the various difficulties that may be faced after marriage, it is difficult to have the courage to take risks for love. Because it is human instinct to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages, no one wants to deliberately take risks. There's a passage that makes a lot of sense:"Marriage is often an impulsive decision, and in the midst of the cheers and noise, in the moments dominated by dopamine, everything becomes beautiful. However, if you calm down and think about it clearly, you will find that this ring does not fit on your finger at all. "
When you start to extend from one thing to another, from one person to a group of people, you will gradually find that one person is also very good. At least you don't have to be entangled in endless right and wrong, you just need to be responsible for yourself and be true to yourself. It's nice to be able to meet the right people and spend your life with them, but if you don't, it's also a cool way to live your sane and sobriety. February** Dynamic Incentive Program