For this question, I think the first point of view should not be whether I dare to look at my shortcomings in front of my children, but whether I dare or not, I must also look at my shortcomings in front of my children. Why? Let me tell you how I feel about it from the following aspects.
First, we often hope to train our children to be very good, hoping that they can find their own shortcomings, and then continue to learn, continue to grow, and become better and better. This wish is very good. But as a parent, everyone knows that it is not easy. Because this process is a process of continuous struggle with children, in this process of fighting, we need to be able to constantly guide children to discover their own shortcomings, and at the same time, we can also encourage children to face their own shortcomings, so that we can continue to improve.
I don't know if you have a feeling, in the process of guiding and educating children, children are particularly reluctant to hear adults criticize him and deny his words, and more like to be uh parents say praise for their children, affirm their children's words?
One of my fond impressions is that there was a child in the kindergarten who did something wrong, and then refused to face it, and lost his temper outside the classroom. So the teacher approached me and asked me to talk to the child. One of the things that was particularly embarrassing and funny when I was communicating with this child was that he could look at me quietly, and it was so difficult for me to make him say "I was wrong". After persisting for a long time, and communicating for a long time, the child finally said that I was wrong.
Through such an incident, I once again feel that we people are really very, very unwilling to face their own shortcomings and shortcomings, and unwilling to face their own mistakes, so guide children to discover their own shortcomings and mistakes. It is a prerequisite for children to continue to get better.
But in this process, let the child be willing, or even if he is unwilling, he can finally face the facts and see his own shortcomings and mistakes. This is one of the most important processes.
If you want your child to see your own shortcomings, you have to let your children know the fact that I have shortcomings and I will make mistakes, which is very normal, not a shameful thing, but something that everyone will have. Anyone who is human makes mistakes, unless they are dead.
So what if the child can realize this fact, the child can think, and he can relatively calmly accept: I am wrong, or I have a deficiency.
But it's not enough to have this part, why?
Because our example as parents is also very important. There are many times when what a child does is not what we teach him to do, but how we do it ourselves, and this is often more effective in education. That said, many times we don't have to say how you should be, child. But when we do it ourselves, children learn naturally.
For example, when facing children, can we talk about our shortcomings and shortcomings? If we can also keep talking about our shortcomings and mistakes in front of our children, then the children will find out: Oh, it turns out that parents also have shortcomings and shortcomings, and parents can also face this fact calmly. Then he will be able to learn this from his mom and dad.
For example, my children. Every time she asks him to study, get up early, and do housework, her first reaction is often "I don't want to." In the face of such a time, I often say to my child: I said yes, mom knows you don't want to. In fact, let me tell you a secret, my mother is actually reluctant to get up early, and my mother is also lazy and unwilling to do housework. But I can't say I can do what I want, I don't do it if I don't want to. I can't say I want to sleep in, I'll sleep all the time, so think about it, what would our lives be like if we both lived like this? I can cook if I want to, I don't cook if I don't want to cook, so do you have anything to eat? If I want to do housework, I will do housework, if I don't want to do housework, I will not do housework, what will our home become? If I want to learn, I will learn, if I don't want to learn, I will not learn, so can we grow? Can we make progress? Will you be able to live a good life in society in the future? When I say this, children are often able to quickly let go of their own thoughts and say: I want to grow up as a good mother, and I also have to take responsibility.
We often have this kind of conversation, and after a long time, the child will quickly be able to let go of his own thoughts and discover his shortcomings. So a mantra that children often say is: Mom, it doesn't matter if you're wrong, just correct it, I said: Yes, no one doesn't make mistakes, we make mistakes, just correct it. Making mistakes is to make us find out where we have shortcomings, what we need to learn, then we can just learn, so that we can improve. No matter how big a mistake you make, you are your mother's favorite child, and you are the cutest child in your mother's eyes. Therefore, now children often take the initiative to say that they are too lazy, so it is easier to accept my words.
So what I want to say is that if we want to educate our children well, we must be able to face our own shortcomings in front of our children, and it is normal for children to find their shortcomings and shortcomings. Not being able to face the shortcomings and shortcomings correctly is the most terrible.
It is the greatest wisdom for a person to be able to recognize his own shortcomings. As long as the correct ideas can be passed on to the child, the child can make great progress. This requires us parents to be able to teach by example, what do we want our children to be? What do we first present to our children? The effect of this education is very large.