Xiaoyun and her boyfriend are in a long-distance relationship, and she took screenshots of their chat records to collect: "If we quarrel one day, I will take it out and see that we once loved each other so much, we won't quarrel." ”
However, the truth dealt her a heavy blow: her boyfriend cheated, and she was in no mood to take out these sweet memories again, besides, even if she took it out, it is estimated that her boyfriend would not look back.
Looking at the sweet records in the computer, Xiao Yun sighed a little: "We used to think that these records are very precious, but things are not people, and these records are just a pile of garbage, and they will enter the ** station after all." ”
Special things are no longer special, and love loses its original freshness and becomes boring. Only by making marriage special can love be kept fresh.
There is a similar case in the movie "Our Story": the husband collects a spoon that he and his wife used together on their first date, and he gives it to his wife as a wedding gift.
At that time, the spoon was a symbol of love between two people, and when they saw the spoon, two people would recall the sweet times when they were dating.
However, after getting married, trivial life replaced passionate love, and the spoon was still there, but it was just a spoon and no longer had any meaning. There will be no less quarrels at all, and the sweetness of the past is only the past.
The book "Distraction Also Has a Good Marriage" makes the point that whether that spoon is ordinary or not depends on how you look at it, how you see yourself, how you see your marriage, and that's the secret.
Specializing marriage is the key to keeping couples close. It's like that spoon, you give it meaning, it's where the sweetness lies; If you just use it as a spoon, then it's just an ornament.
The book mentions that this can be done to make marriage special:
First, we need to have a deep understanding of each other's preferences so that we can better communicate each other's needs and expectations.
This includes not only the small habits in daily life, but also the other person's plans and expectations for the future. By understanding each other's preferences, we can better adjust our behavior so that the other person feels understood and respected.
Secondly, we can add a sense of detail to our love by giving each other some extra surprises.
These surprises can be small everyday greetings or sudden romantic gestures. For example, extend a second during a kiss, take a sunset stroll with your partner, or prepare a special dinner for your partner. These small gestures can make the other party feel your care and love, and make love more colorful.
Third, we can make love more meaningful by adding some sense of ritual.
These rituals can be a weekly date night or an annual anniversary. Through these sense of ritual, we can make the other person feel important to each other and make the love more stable and long-lasting.
Fourth, it is also very important to put down the phone at a critical moment.
Don't let electronics take the place of intimacy. Put away your phone for half an hour before going to bed, and the relationship between husband and wife will quickly warm up.
Finally, we should maintain a positive attitude.
There will inevitably be setbacks and difficulties in love, but we can't give up because of this. We should believe in our own choices, believe in the love of the other person, and strive to make love better.
Cherish the special feeling, let the love be as eternal as new; Breaking the common view, so that the marriage is always extraordinary.
When you are willing to give special meaning to the traces of two people living together, love can be preserved. Do you remember what was the most meaningful item when you were in love? Where is it now?
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