In Chinese family relationships, the relationship between in-laws and daughters-in-law has always been a complex and sensitive topic.
The delicate nature of this relationship often stems from the parties' different understandings of responsibilities, obligations and expectations.
As a country with a deep cultural heritage, China has a lot of proverbs and sayings about family relationships.
Among them, there is a very classic sentence: "Ten years to see the mother-in-law, ten years to see the daughter-in-law".
This sentence can be used as the golden key to solve this complex relationship.
Ten years to see the mother-in-law, ten years to see the daughter-in-law", the meaning of this sentence is that in the first ten years of the daughter-in-law's marriage, the mother-in-law should do her best to help her.
It's not just about material support, it's about the inheritance of experience and wisdom.
During this decade, daughters-in-law may face many challenges, such as how to adapt to a new family environment, how to deal with the relationship with her husband, how to raise children, and so on.
The help and guidance of her mother-in-law will enable her to better cope with these challenges and establish her own family status and pace of life.
In fact, it's not a one-way giveaway.
On the contrary, the mother-in-law will also gradually age over time and need the care and attention of her daughter-in-law.
At this time, the daughter-in-law should repay the mother-in-law with the same attitude and actions.
This kind of family atmosphere of caring for each other and helping each other can not only deepen the relationship between both parties, but also make the whole family more harmonious and happy.
So, why are some in-laws reluctant to lend a helping hand to their daughters-in-law when they need help?
On the one hand, it may be because some in-laws think that their experience and knowledge are outdated, or they are worried that their interference will cause family conflicts.
On the other hand, there are also some in-laws who are selfish and think that their efforts are not rewarded enough, and they are unwilling to invest too much in their daughters-in-law.
In fact, these ideas are one-sided and short-sighted.
In modern society, although the family structure and lifestyle have changed a lot, the basic principles of family relations have not changed.
In a family, helping each other and growing together are the most basic values.
If the in-laws can let go of the prejudices and worries in their hearts, accept their daughter-in-law with an open mind, and help her with practical actions, then the family will be happier and more satisfied.
An old woman next door was very supportive of her daughter-in-law when she was young.
When her daughter-in-law first got married, she not only helped her with the children and housework, but also passed on her experience and wisdom without reservation.
She treats her daughter-in-law as if she were her own daughter.
As time passed, the grandmother grew old and needed to be taken care of.
It is gratifying that her daughter-in-law has not forgotten her mother-in-law's help and support for her.
She not only takes care of her life, but also often chats and walks with her, which makes her feel the warmth and happiness of home.
This example tells us that "ten years of seeing the mother-in-law, ten years of seeing the daughter-in-law" is not only a principle for dealing with family relations, but also a kind of inheritance of family culture of caring for and helping each other.
This kind of culture not only requires the joint efforts and dedication of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but also the recognition and support of the whole family.
The formation of this culture did not happen overnight.
It requires constant communication, understanding, and inclusion on both sides in their daily lives.
Only in this way can we establish an equal, respectful and harmonious family relationship, so that every family member can feel the warmth and happiness of home.
I hope all the in-laws can understand this truth.
When we are old, it is not money and material things that can really accompany us, but our families.
If we can lend a helping hand to our daughter-in-law when she needs help, we will surely receive the same support and care when we grow old.
Such a life is a complete and beautiful life.