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The Spring Festival holiday is finally over, and my friend happily told me on WeChat that I really want to go back to work, but I am tired of being at home, and I can stay enough.
I asked her what she was bothered about, and she sighed and said that it wasn't bothering those relatives, she finally had a holiday, and she wanted to take a good rest when she returned to her hometown. As a result, one moment this came, the other one came, locked in the house and wanted to sleep secretly, and my mother-in-law had to pull me out to talk.
What's even more annoying is that I have to follow my husband to visit relatives, walk two times a day, walk around a lot, who is who, I don't remember any of them, I make myself tired and annoyed, and a good holiday is in the soup.
Visiting relatives during the Spring Festival is indeed an unhappy topic.
Just a while ago, the topic of young people's "breaking off relatives" also rushed to the hot searchsaid that blood kinship is about to come to an end:The post-70s generation is still leaving relatives, the post-80s are occasionally leaving, and by the post-90s generation, they don't want to leave, and the post-00s don't go at all.
But it's not realistic to go at all, it's not realistic, the main thing is that you go.
I believe that many people have also had such an experience, when they went home for the holidays, they wanted to accompany their parents, but they were forced by their parents to go to relatives: you go to see your aunt, your aunt's children often come to see me; You see, you have gone to your aunt's house, do you have to go to your uncle's house too, if you don't go, let him know that you are not happy that you came back and did not go to see him.
So, you can only carry big bags and small bags, go through each house, stick to the money, suffer from it, and even if you are not happy in your heart, you have to laugh with it.
The point is, does it really make sense to go to relatives in such a tired way? Can visiting relatives really maintain family affection? Why is it that the more you read, the more people who are outside, the more reluctant you are to go to your relatives?
Today, I would like to take this article to talk to you about this topic.
Why people are less and less inclined to go to relatives
Because times have changed, since the post-80s generation, family affection has become more and more indifferent. It's not that they're not close to people, it's because of the rules of society.
The reason why the post-50s and post-60s generation love to go to relatives and attach importance to family affection is because in that era, there were too few opportunities to make a living, and everyone needed to join a group to keep warm. What's more, in that era, knowledge could completely change fate, and between brothers and sisters, as long as one person was rich or admitted to college, they could easily help other relatives up.
But now, everything has changed. The means of production in society are becoming more and more centralized, the strata are becoming more and more solidified, and the soaring prices and housing prices make everyone have no time to take care of themselves. It's hard to change your fate when you go to college, and sometimes, if you don't work hard, you may be laid off by the age of 35.
So, you don't have the ability to take care of other people, and you don't have the time to sit down with relatives and talk about things, what you can do is to continue to develop yourself and make money.
But the parents' generation did not understand that many people in their generation did not hesitate to lose their families for the sake of their brothers and sisters, and some worked for others for most of their lives, but in the end, not only did they get the gratitude of others, but they were also complained about because of the unbalanced care of their brothers and sisters.
Now, most families have only one child, and they no longer want to be like their parents' generation, busy with others, because they see an almost cruel truth from their parents:There are many so-called family affections, but the more you give, the more others take it for granted, the more kind you are, and the cheaper others are to you.
Therefore, people nowadays will no longer overdraw their ability to help others like their parents, and they are more and more aware of keeping a distance from their relatives, and visiting relatives is becoming less and less.
Visiting relatives does not maintain family affection
This Spring Festival, there are many people who rush to the next house after walking like an assembly line in order to go to relatives, and they don't dare to delay at all, for fear that they won't be able to finish in 7 days.
This kind of walking, to be honest, is just completing the tasks assigned by the parents, and it is not family affection at all. Any relationship needs to be maintained with each other and needs time to nourish, and there is no time to precipitate family affection, and it will break sooner or later when you walk.
For example, why is it not easy to break the relationship between us and our parents? Because in addition to blood kinship, when we were very young, our parents spent time with us; When we grew up, got married, and had children, our parents took the time to take care of our children, and our parents spent time and energy for us all the time.
And what about those relatives? Probably in addition to being closer when I was a child, with each having an independent life, the relationship is getting farther and farther apart. If you don't believe it, you can look at your relatives for the New Year, it's nothing more than going to chat a few words, talking about how your body is doing, how your work is, and then you have nothing to say.
Sometimes, you have to believe that time and distance really dilute everything. Therefore, such a tired relatives can't maintain family affection at all, we might as well look down on it and complete the task of our parents.
is not in a circle, destined to go more and more
I remember when I was a child, I asked my dad a question, my mother's aunts are so powerful, they are doctors, and they are leaders of state-owned enterprises, at that time, why didn't they give us a hand?
My dad said a word, very realistic, he said:If the shoulders are uneven, how can people pull it? Besides, if it's not a level and don't live together, even if you can't pull up your own son.
Thinking about it now, I suddenly understood the meaning of this sentence. In fact, relatives also pay attention to reciprocity, which is like when you go to a relative's house and bring gifts, the other party has to give you back.
Everyone is mixed very well, and the circle you are in is unattainable now, and people have no common language with you, even if you are pulled, you can't enter other people's circles if you don't have the ability.
Therefore, if relatives want to have a long-term relationship, unless they live in a circle, for example, they are all working-class or businessmen, and relatives who are not in the same circle are destined to go further and further.
When you figure these things out, you will understand that what relatives are not relatives, some people, appear in their lives for a while, and some people are destined to go further and further away from themselves.
Therefore, when people reach middle age, they must learn to give up. Instead of tangling the relationship and breaking it, it is better to focus on the construction of your own family, honor your parents, and manage the interpersonal relationships around you.
If the article inspires you, click on itLike + watching, I hope you can be yourself in 2025, without leaving relatives.
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Hello, friends, the Spring Festival update is not particularly regularIt will be updated on time from February 20 onwards
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