Share the story What is it like for someone who lacks love?

Mondo Psychological Updated on 2024-02-18

When I was with my ex, he took great care of me. They would cook brown sugar water when I had menstrual cramps, would queue up for an hour to buy my favorite sugar-fried chestnuts for me, would give me my favorite dishes every time I ate, and would use sticky notes to remember all my likes and dislikes. I was moved to tears and asked him why he was so kind to me. He only said four words: "Because I like it." "In just four words, sincere and firm, I felt love like never before. But he didn't seem to be satisfied with his answer, and when he returned to the dormitory, he sent me another message: After the Tyndall effect was discovered, the light took on a shape, and after meeting you, I was intrigued.

Not only that, but he also left a message in my space: "I can do a lot of romantic and concrete things with you." We can go to see the sunset together, to smell the warm sunshine, to set fire to the vast places of the four wilds, to hibernate and keep warm, and to melt each other. I looked at these words over and over again, and the happy smile on my face lingered for a long time.

I thought we would go on like this, just like the atoms in the universe will not be annihilated, and we will eventually be together. But I don't know when he became perfunctory, he began to be hot and cold to me, and he couldn't remember everything I liked or didn't like. I talked to him several times, but each time he was secretive and said that I was sensitive and worried. At a class reunion, he went to meet his ex-girlfriend, and the two of them revived. Everything was so sudden that it caught me off guard. That's when I realized that he was just trying to make his ex-girlfriend angry with me. Those touching love words, those gentle details, those romances at his fingertips, and those meticulous care are just his disguises. I should have found out that the relationship was flawed. He didn't give me a special note, he didn't want to use a couple's avatar, and even blocked some people when he officially announced his relationship, and even my ** number was just a string of cold numbers, which was not stored in his address book at all.

But at that time, I just thought that it was enough for him to be nice to me, and I didn't care about that. Only now do I realize that he didn't include me in his future life plan at all, and I stupidly drowned myself in love. After the breakup, my friend advised me: don't be in a hurry next time you fall in love, don't be blinded by emotion, and love the right person, because it's love, not practicing love. Only then did I realize that I had almost pushed myself into the abyss because of my lack of love. Because of the lack of love, once I meet someone who is good to me, I will choose to trust without reservation, whether it is a lover or a friend. Because of this, I love so much every time, blindly and even heartbreakingly.

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