Today's topic: What should I do if I meet relatives who have no sense of boundaries?
It can be a headache to meet relatives who have no sense of boundaries, and some relatives will make embarrassing requests, such as borrowing money, helping to buy a house, etc. Some relatives will even take advantage and reverse black and white, which makes people feel chilling. Therefore, we need to learn to say no, protect our interests, and at the same time keep a certain distance to avoid being dragged down by relatives. When dealing with kinship, we need to think rationally, not be blinded by family affection, and at the same time need to stick to our own principles and bottom line.
(Disclaimer: The following are real netizen messages, do not represent the author's point of view, and cannot confirm their authenticity).
A friend who hasn't been in touch for many years, my son brought a girlfriend home and asked how much I wanted to give a meeting gift, I didn't say anything, but she said 10,000 and 1, and asked me to borrow 10,000, is my daughter-in-law here [stunned] decisively refused
Shanghai, naked marriage (both families are Shanghainese, not black).
One month after getting married, his mother took a fancy to the house that her next-door neighbor was selling and wanted to buy it. He had an old dilapidated house, and he refused to sell it, and he didn't have time to sell it.
I used my pre-marital savings to buy the house next door to my in-laws' house in full.
His name was added, and his household registration was moved in.
I also paid for the decoration of the new house and the home appliances.
After the confinement, he came to work in Hangzhou. His sister's family of three lived in, hiding from me, and lived for 5 years, sleeping in my marriage bed.
When I found out later, I didn't say anything, so as not to make it difficult for him.
They went around telling their friends and relatives that the house was bought by their husband.
My dad asked him if he had taken the keys and went back to Shanghai for a few days, but his mother kicked him out.
His mom was still scolding me and my parents in their family group.
This house, 18 years, I lived in it for less than half a year.
Now I want to rent or sell and ask my friend to take a few **, but his mother won't open the door.
He admitted in WeChat that I have the final say in this house, and my friend showed her the WeChat records, and she said that she didn't read WeChat. I asked him to hit his mother, but she still wouldn't open. Force me to report 110.
There are too many bloody things, and it is difficult to ...... them
Really, don't marry into a poor and poor family, you have to count everything, you have to take advantage, and you have to feel that they are at a loss. He also reversed black and white, scolding me for creating contradictions and having no humanity.
My mother-in-law is also a wonderful, I didn't give anything to my wife when I got married, I paid for the full house, the whole car, the decoration is also out of me, the furniture or something is all out of me, the mother-in-law wants a 10w bride price, after getting the bride price, I will hand it over to my wife and say that this is your marriage, the money you buy a TV and refrigerator is also counted, the wedding guests want to invite with my family, I want my family to settle the table money, my family to call too many people to refuse, after two years, my mother-in-law and father-in-law opened a store to buy a house and buy a car behind my back and asked my wife to borrow money, ** in my wife did not agree, While I was on duty at night, I went directly to my house and asked my wife to borrow 10w
My aunt and my uncle took advantage of the fact that my family was not at home, and sold my family's farm car for more than 8,000, and after 14 or 5 years, I still owe more than 3,000 to my family
A few days ago, a relative asked me to help her buy a second-hand Apple 13, with a budget of 1,500 yuan, I am in Shenzhen, and the problem is that I don't make mobile phones
My husband and aunt asked my husband to hide from me and my mother-in-law to take a mortgage on his hometown house for her family. I told my mother-in-law, who was furious. I went back to my hometown and scolded him in the front and back rooms, saying that his aunt was his white moonlight and red roses, and my second-married wife was not worthy of knowing about the family in the eyes of his aunt. No one knew I could be crazy like this, and since then I have been afraid to do housework ever since
We had just sold our house and wanted to buy a house for our children in another country, and my nephew said he wanted to buy a house and let us lend him the money! The point is that he already has a house, my child doesn't have a house! At that time, we were worried, let's borrow it, we can't buy a house, don't borrow it, the family affection is gone!
Two years ago, my second uncle saw that I hadn't bought a house in the city, and he offered to transfer a house to me (borrowed from me), (he had a house in his son's (my cousin's) name, because my cousin had several houses, put one in my second uncle's name), so that my son could go to school in the city, because our policy here is to look at the real estate certificate, and go to school according to the zoning. My aunt also said at that time that she would lend me a house for her daughter, and she bought a new one, so that she would have two apartments for my son to use for school, for which I am very grateful. But then I bought a house for myself
My distant relatives gave birth to a baby and told me in advance, as if they were going to give birth to a baby! Let me give her all my baby's ......Even the face towel was given to me, some time ago I wanted to use my real estate certificate to let her baby go to school, I didn't borrow it, and I talked yin and yang weirdly, ruining my reputation now! WeChat has been deleted and blocked, and the day is endless
My husband's uncle's family borrowed money, and his son had no money to get married, and he wanted us to help them give him a mortgage on the façade, but he didn't help, and he borrowed tens of thousands of yuan, and it has been five or six years, and he hasn't paid back 5,000 less
My family sells building materials, my mother-in-law's sister and brother will decorate the building materials bought at my house in 2020, and they have not given money, and my mother wants money this year, saying that my mother is difficult to speak and is unwilling to give. Their family goes out to travel, buys a car, and has money for everything, but they don't give it. Not giving money was also instructed by my mother-in-law
My eldest aunt is in her seventies, and when my uncle entered the factory when she was young, her family was in the city, which was equivalent to marrying the daughter of a powerful family. I never looked down on us, and when my grandfather was alive in the past, the family of three would only come back once a year when my grandfather had his birthday.
I have never given pension money, and when my uncle got married, my grandfather said that the old house he lived in would die for him in the future, and the other one would be given to my uncle. Later, we built a road here and demolished the house that belonged to him, and he rushed back overnight to sign and take 15,000 yuan that morning. He didn't care that the old man didn't have a house to live in, and left directly after signing. Later, the only cousin was admitted to Chengdu and married in Chengdu, the key is that the cousin is not rare to the two of them at all, and does not want them to go.
And from then on, I told my mother that she wanted to pass on my sister to her, why did she want my sister? Because when my sister was in junior high school, my grandmother was paralyzed, and my sister was reluctant to let my mother wash the dirty clothes for my grandmother every day, and my sister washed them all (I couldn't help when I went to college in other places), she thought that my sister would take care of people, and they all came to my house from the city to live in my house for more than a month. Later, my mother really couldn't help it, and my mother said to let her ask my sister directly, and my sister agreed that she had no opinion. My sister said that I graduated and could make money, why should I pass it on to you? When I was a kid and needed to pay for school, why didn't you say it? Then they gave up and sold the house to go to their cousin in Chengdu, and later their grandfather died. They each came back once, and then later, they didn't come back when their grandfather erected the monument, saying that they wouldn't come back if the cost was too big, and if they needed to share the money, just tell them. My mother and uncle had an opinion, but they didn't express their position, and the opinion of our younger generation was that we could share the money for erecting the monument, and we didn't need him and wouldn't engrave their names.
My cousin's child, in the third year of high school, was hospitalized to remove a thing, and my uncle called ** after being sent to the provincial capital to call my dad to serve, just when I went home, my dad also called me out of a red envelope [tears]! Later, my dad had an epileptic cerebral infarction, and the child went to college in the same city, and he never came to see it once, and the farmland in our hometown was also occupied by the child's father, alas
At that time, my father and my aunt's son competed for a position, and the position was given to my aunt's family because of the principle of respecting the elderly. My father was admitted to the secondary school, my uncle's son was admitted to high school and was not admitted to repeat, and my father gave money to my uncle's children to repeat and did not give his son to secondary school
My uncle's cousin asked me to transfer the house to her for a loan, and five years later she found someone to borrow the working capital to pay it back and then lend it out. So after five years, she didn't even think about paying off the loan and returning to my house. I scolded her directly
Thank you for reading, those who have money have a money field, and those who have no money have a personal field, please like and pay attention to it, and see you in the comment area!