A writer once shared such a far-reaching story:
A friend has opened a new shoe store, but it's not doing as well as the competitor next door. One day, the friend confided in the writer with indignation: "I vow to close the shop next door!" ”
In the face of his friend's angry words, the writer did not respond immediately, but invited him to take a bath with him to soothe his mood. While bathing, my friend noticed that the writer's back was covered with dense scars, and couldn't help but wonder.
In this regard, the writer smiled indifferently and said: "I once suffered from sores, and I couldn't help scratching because of the unbearable itching, so that the ** broke and left these scars."
In fact, the feeling of itching is not only on the surface of the skin, but also in the depths of our hearts.
Greed and lust are like itching in the heart, if left unchecked, they can be painful and can eventually lead to self-harm and scarring. ”
These words touched the hearts of his friends, and since then, he has stopped paying too much attention to the dynamics of his opponents, and has instead concentrated on running his own store and improving his own service and quality.
Unexpectedly, his business became more and more prosperous as a result.
Life is long, and desire can lead to both calamity and hardship. If we want to find peace and well-being, we must learn to restrain and abstain from these three desires.
Quit the desire to compare, and the heart is clear
Zeng Guofan once said: "Don't compete with gentlemen for fame, don't compete with villains, don't compete with heaven and earth." ”
The implication is that the wise do not compare themselves with others.
Everyone in the world feels tired of life, but the tiredness of life comes partly from survival, and the greater reason lies in comparison.
With the achievements of others, compared to oneself, the heart is not pure, troubles arise, and anxiety is great.
The misfortune of middle-aged people is nothing more than this.
There is this scene in "Wulin Gaiden" that is unforgettable:
Shopkeeper Tong Xiangyu's childhood friend Han Juan visited.
After a few conversations, the two secretly competed.
After Han Juanyan married to the Kunlun faction, her life was dull, but she had the authority to go out, had plenty of money, and lived a comfortable life.
This remark touched Xiangyu's heart.
Xiang Yusi, Han Juan married a hero, rich and leisurely, and she is a widow, busy living, only a few taels of broken silver.
The imbalance in her heart made Xiangyu extremely aggrieved, and she even had to compete with Han Juan at the expense of bankruptcy, and the result was naturally chaos.
Human disasters often begin with comparison.
Writer Yi Shuihan said: "Comparison is the source of all tragedies, and it is a poison that makes you never happy." ”
Life is long, with joys and sorrows.
Now that you have reached the middle of your life, you should learn to find happiness in your own body.
As the saying goes, people have to die more than people, and goods have to be thrown away.
Don't envy the position of others, don't live in the eyes of others.
On the road of life, each has its own scenery and its own path.
Instead of dwelling on what others have, learn to cherish your own life.
Happiness is not about having too much, but about caring about less.
Quit utilitarian desires and calm your mind
Yang Ming once said: "Every time you reduce your desires, you will have more heavenly principles." ”
This tells us that reducing the desire for utilitarianism can lead to a more peaceful heart.
Yanagi Sogen once depicted a huge whale. Swimming in the South China Sea, this whale is so large that it can swallow dozens of boat-sized fish in one bite.
One day, it chased its prey to the northern shallows, and the sea gradually receded, but it still clinged to the delicious food in front of it, and as a result, it was stranded on the beach and could never return to its home in the South Seas.
Fame and fortune in life are like the tempting schools of fish, attracting people.
Once you fall into it, you can fall into a situation from which you will never recover. We must learn to streamline our desires and let go of our excessive pursuit of money, status, and fame in order to truly achieve inner peace and satisfaction.
When people reach middle age, we should focus our lives on things that are more meaningful and valuable, and pursue inner peace and contentment, rather than focusing too much on external utilitarianism. There is no such thing as everything going well in life, the key is to look open and look down.
As Zhuangzi said, "Wrens only need one branch to build a nest in the deep forest; The mole drinks water by the river and only needs to fill its belly. ”
You don't have to have too much money, just enough for your needs; The house doesn't have to be too big, just be able to live in it.
Happy days often lie in the plain firewood, rice, oil and salt. Having a certain amount of savings, a healthy body, a warm family, and a warm light waiting for us in countless tired nights is the best time.
Quit vanity desires and be broad-hearted
In an in-depth article in the Times Post, there is such a sobering proverb: "When individuals are too indulged in superficial brilliance and overly whitewash, they will often drag down their real lives." ”
There is no greater foolishness than blind attachment to vanity. This vanity drive will cause him to pay too much attention to the eyes of the outside world, so that he loses his true self in the process of chasing flashy appearances.
Fairy tale master Zheng Yuanjie once met a representative writer at a literary peer exchange meeting.
The writer asked Zheng Yuanjie if he had read the famous book "The Golden Rose", and after receiving a negative answer, he questioned in an exaggerated tone: "I haven't even read this book, how do you usually create?" The writer then goes on and on to list the various books he has dabbled in.
In the course of the meeting, when it was Zheng Yuanjie's turn to speak, he subtly responded: "I am recently studying a book by the Soviet writer Svchenko, I wonder if any of you here know? Everyone shook their heads, but the writer who had flaunted his breadth of reading proudly stood up and declared, "I have read this book!" ”
However, Zheng Yuanjie smiled indifferently and revealed the truth: "I made up this name temporarily. As soon as these words came out, the writer was speechless.
In real life, the more people lack real talent and learning, the easier it is to magnify others' evaluation of themselves, and regard the envy and pursuit of others as a symbol of their own strength.
As everyone knows, these castles that seem to be as bright as sand and gravel will collapse in an instant when the wind blows.
As the "Zhuangzi" says: "The heart is carefree and happy, which is the ultimate state of virtue." "In this world, there are not many people who really care about the quality of your life, and the ups and downs of life are only self-aware, so that your heart is at ease, which is the highest level of decency.
Therefore, one should do what one can do, and do not force oneself to satisfy one's vanity, which will only exhaust oneself and make a mess of one's life.
Someone once said: "There are two strokes of human characters, one is to write the first half of life, the other is to write the second half of life, the first half of life to write perseverance, and the second half of life to write relief." ”
In this world, there is no eternal luck, and there is no eternal misfortune.
Therefore, we don't have to always compare ourselves to others, we don't have to be overly greedy, and we don't have to pursue vanity excessively.
Instead of looking at others with envy, focus on your own life. Enjoy our days in peace and at our own pace so that we can truly live our lives to the fullest.
When we reach middle age, we should learn to be content, because contentment is blessed. If you don't want too much, you will be complete. When we quit superfluous desires, blessings will naturally come uninvited.
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