In the complex web of relationships, it's inevitable to meet people who don't like you. However, Zhuangzi's words of wisdom give us a different way of dealing with it, a way for you to win yourself without turning your face. The four sentences of Zhuangzi seem to be a golden key to unlock interpersonal relationships, which can allow you to face people who are not in harmony with you with a calm and calm attitude.
This is not only a kind of wisdom of the heart, but also a wise philosophy of life. Let us immerse ourselves in Zhuangzi's words and deeply understand his wisdom, how these four sentences can become a weapon for interpersonal relationships, and win us more tolerance and calmness in life. Perhaps, in these four sentences, you will find a new realm in dealing with interpersonal relationships, and thus become a wise man in life.
Zhuang Zhou, name Zhou, Zixiu, Han nationality, late Spring and Autumn period. He lived in the territory of Chu and lived in poverty all his life, but he had insight into the world and was well versed in human nature. Zhuang Zhou has been withdrawn since he was a child, not good at socializing, and is often misunderstood and rejected by his peers. However, he has the ability to perceive people's hearts and understand the emotional needs of others. Zhuang Zhou realized that the most basic bond between people is love.
Everyone, young and old, rich and poor, longs for love. This kind of love includes not only love, but also friendship, benevolence, and all warm and sincere emotions. Those who are popular are often the ones who know best how to give love and evoke love in others.
When he was 20 years old, Zhuang Zhou was deeply touched by one thing: there was a child in the village who was introverted and was often bullied by other children. One day, Zhuang Zhou saw that the child was sitting at the entrance of the village and couldn't cry, so he stepped forward to ask, and it turned out that the other children had taken his toys and pushed him down.
Zhuang Zhou's heart softened, and he held the child in his arms and comforted him softly, and the child gradually stopped crying. From that day on, the child always stuck to Zhuang Zhou as if he had found a confidant, and Zhuang Zhou often made him happy.
This little incident made Zhuang Zhou realize that the reason why people suffer is often because they can't get love or are deprived of love. And those who are popular tend to give the most love and warmth.
People's hearts are buoyant, although the sparrows are small, they have all kinds of organs. Each of us has a need for love in our hearts, even the most withdrawn and perverse person, there is a child who longs to be loved in his heart. Learning to give love is the key to people's hearts.
When Zhuang Zhou was 25 years old, he encountered the first major decision in his life. A wealthy man from afar invited Zhuang Zhou to his territory as a teacher, promising him a generous property and income. At the same time, Zhuang Zhou's hometown also had people come to hire him to open a private school to promote traditional culture, although it could not give Zhuang Zhou too much material, but it could greatly increase his influence.
Zhuang Zhou fell into deep thought. The dilemma is between material prosperity and fame and influence. The two seem to be of equal weight, making Zhuang Zhou unable to choose.
At this time, the young son of Zhuang Zhou's neighbor became seriously ill. Seeing this, Zhuang Zhou immediately invited a famous doctor. The famous doctor prescribes medicine, but the medicinal materials are rare and expensive. Upon learning of this, well-wishers in the neighborhood donated generously and quickly made up the price of the medicine. The young son eventually survived.
This scene deeply touched Zhuang Zhou. It turns out that if there is a collection of interests, there will be people; If it can bring benefits to people, it will attract people. This is the profit-seeking nature of the human heart. Since human nature is like this, it should also be applied to the management of human beings. If you want to gain hearts and loyalty, you need to have people's income.
Zhuang Zhou finally made a choice - he decided to return to his hometown and serve his fellow villagers by teaching. Although materially unsatisfactory, through teaching and enlightenment, he can help more people achieve inner prosperity. This is also the most important choice in Zhuang Zhou's life. The good and evil of the human heart are also the way; See the virtuous and hidden, see the unvirtuous and show.
At the age of 35, the private school founded by Zhuang Zhou was already famous, and many powerful people in the county also sent their children to study. One day, a ** son from a neighboring county also came to learn art.
Although this son is mediocre in talent, he is of noble birth and arrogant and willful. Zhuang Zhou knew that such a character was not easy to get along with, but when he remembered the identity of his parents, he still accepted it gladly and treated him with courtesy.
However, what Zhuang Zhou didn't expect was that this son was not only lazy in his studies, but also often bullied other students. Once, he made fun of a student from a poor family in public, and the student burst into tears. Zhuang Zhou couldn't bear it anymore and reprimanded the son sternly.
Surprisingly, the son did not regret it, but was furious, said a lot of bad things about Zhuang Zhou in front of his father, and asked his father to drive Zhuang Zhou away and close the private school. Zhuang Zhou faced an unprecedented crisis, and he fell into deep confusion and pain.
At this moment, a primary school student came to Zhuang Zhou, and he took out his hard-earned pocket money to help Zhuang Zhou tide over the difficulties. There are also several students who have expressed their support, hoping that Zhuang Zhou will not give up.
Zhuang Zhou suddenly realized that he was not alone. The students did not care about Zhuang Zhou's origin and identity, but sincerely respected and appreciated his teachings. It was they who gave Zhuang Zhou the courage to keep going.
Since then, Zhuang Zhou has cherished every student even more. He will often encourage and praise their strengths and help them build self-confidence, which is often more instructive than harsh discipline. Zhuang Zhou also realized that there is a bottomless well of vanity in human nature, and he longs for the recognition and praise of others, which can be satisfied through positive emotional stimulation.
Time flies, the years change, and Zhuang Zhou is over half a hundred years old. Over the years, he has cultivated no math students, and his fame has also shocked several counties. Many powerful people also came to visit and ask for advice, seeking his advice and advice. It can be said that Zhuang Zhou is already a popular figure in the local area.
In the face of visiting guests, Zhuang Zhou never flattered, nor did he have any hypocritical flattery. Once, a county magistrate approached Zhuang Zhou and asked him to say something kind and get a promoted official position for himself. Zhuang Zhou quietly refused.
The county commander was furious, and openly questioned Zhuang Zhou for having no feelings, and refused to say a good word for himself, an old friend. Zhuang Zhou smiled and asked the county order: "If I am flattering, will you still trust me and respect my opinion?" The reason why I am famous today is not because of rhetoric. ”
The county commander was stunned, and finally left with a red face, and never bothered again. This vignette made Zhuang Zhou realize the complexity of human nature again. People hate flattery and flattery, but they often crave praise from others. People hate the will imposed on them by others, but they often let others do as they please.
Pushing oneself and others, not doing what you don't want to do, and not forcing others to do things that you don't intended, this is the true meaning of life. Maybe many people don't like a real Zhuang Zhou, but Zhuang Zhou doesn't care. Victory is not martial, this is his life creed.
The years have passed, the white horse has passed, and Zhuang Zhou has grown old. He stopped coaching and spent his old age in a cottage in the suburbs. Occasionally, children or villagers visit, Zhuang Zhou still remembers it vividly and is full of energy.
The son is in awe of the mandate of heaven, observes the hearts of the people, and has a reputation far and wide, which shows that Mr. has a conscience worthy of heaven and earth in his life. One visitor said. Zhuang Zhou laughed loudly after hearing this: "The old man was not smooth when he was young, and he was once in a slump, but fortunately he realized the true meaning of human feelings in time, which is why he has today."
Those few words are actually very simple, and they are also seen in human nature - love is kissing, benefit is coming, reputation is persuasion, and evil is scattered. It's not difficult to deal with things, but it's hard to be careful. Over the years, the old man has only done one thing, that is, to fight against his own heart, and always be vigilant against those demons that can turn people bad, so that he has lived up to his true heart.
Speaking of this, Zhuang Zhou couldn't help but think of everything when he was young. He smiled with satisfaction, although life is short, he has no regrets. Because he understands the human heart and understands human nature, this is the greatest harvest of his life.