In the world of feelings, there is a truth that may be overlooked: the more you continue to give and express love, the more likely a man is to feel alienated from you and take your good as an interruption. This is closely related to the Veblen effect in psychology, that is, things are expensive. Two things need to be done with caution: frequent voluntary giving and forcible retention after a breakup. Next, we delve into these two phenomena and the psychological mechanisms in them.
Article: The more often you take the initiative to give, the more it will make your contribution seem cheap. There was a ** thought-provoking paragraph, the boy confessed to the girl, and the girl did not accept it at first, but the boy unremittingly sent breakfast and flowers, which met the girl's expectations for romance. Gradually, the girl became more attentive and agreed to the boy. The girls' efforts gradually increased, and they even quit their jobs for the boys and obeyed him. Boys gradually become impatient, dislike girls for a lot of things, and their attitudes change. This shows a psychological phenomenon: the first effort is scarce and precious, but too frequent giving can make people accustomed to it and lose its particularity.
Forced retention after a breakup is often counterproductive. In one case, a girl took the initiative to pursue because she liked the gentleness of a boy, but after getting back together, she found that the relationship was not as good as she imagined. Boys begin to become indifferent, and expectations of girls fade. In the end, the girl took the initiative to break up, causing the boy to stay. This kind of retention is often out of temporary soft-heartedness, rather than true cherishing. The person who forcibly retains him may already have other plans in his heart, but he is forced to respond to it for the sake of face, and this kind of feeling is destined to be over.
What these two phenomena have in common is that excessive proactive giving and forcible retention can upset the balance of feelings. In love, moderate distance and mutual respect are key to maintaining a relationship. Frequent active efforts may cause aesthetic fatigue to the other party, and overly strong retention may put the relationship in an awkward situation.
In this world of emotional games, we need to learn to balance giving and gaining, and cherish our own value. Giving in a relationship is not one-sided, but a two-way communication and understanding. Excessive active giving and forcible retention will only add unnecessary fluctuations to the balance of feelings, and make the relationship irreparably broken.
In love, moderate distance and mutual respect are key to maintaining a relationship. Frequent active efforts may cause aesthetic fatigue to the other party, and overly strong retention may put the relationship in an awkward situation. We need to learn to balance giving and receiving, and cherish our own value. Giving in a relationship is not one-sided, but a two-way communication and understanding. Excessive active giving and forcible retention will only add unnecessary fluctuations to the balance of feelings, and make the relationship irreparably broken.
Question guidance: Have you ever taken the initiative to give or forcibly retain in a relationship? Share your feelings and lessons. What do you think is the most important principle when it comes to maintaining relationships? Feel free to leave a comment to share your thoughts. Experience has taught us that love is a complex and delicate game. In giving and maintaining relationships, we need to learn to be flexible, understand the needs of both parties, and always maintain a sense of our own worth. Below, let's take a deeper look at the psychological principles behind these two phenomena.
Frequent and unsolicited efforts can cause aesthetic fatigue. There is a phenomenon in psychology called the "Veblen effect", in which people are more likely to become interested in scarce items or behaviors. The first initiative to give, such as the gift given by the girl in the **, is felt precious by the boy because of its scarcity. When this kind of giving becomes too frequent, people will gradually become numb, take it for granted, and lose the particularity of the first time. Maintaining the scarcity of giving in moderation may be able to better stimulate the other party's cherishing heart.
Forced retention after a breakup is often a psychological escape. In this case, the girl forcibly retained the boy in an attempt to make up for the lack of affection through external behavior. This approach is often only a palliative rather than a cure. People who are forcibly retained are often not cherished sincerely, but out of momentary guilt or face. Feelings need to be understood and resonated by both parties, and unilateral strong retention will only make the relationship fall into a more complex and awkward state.
The game of love requires balance and reason. Different people have different emotional outlooks, and cherishing a person needs to be built on the basis of equality and respect. Frequent voluntary giving and forcible retention will only cause unnecessary fluctuations in the balance of feelings and destroy the original harmony.
We need to think about how to maintain balance in love, and avoid excessive initiative and strong retention. Looking at feelings rationally and respecting each other's choices is also a kind of respect for yourself. In the emotional game, knowing the balance between letting go and keeping may be able to create a more stable and happy love relationship.
Love is a process of continuous learning and adaptation, and everyone is looking for their own happiness in the process. In the complex world of feelings, we may need more understanding and tolerance, give each other enough space, and give ourselves a peaceful heart. The true meaning of love lies in equality, cherishing and mutual understanding, and this is what we have been pursuing in our relationships.
Question guidance: Have you ever taken the initiative to give or forcibly retained? How do you adjust your attitudes and behaviors in the face of emotional distress? Welcome to leave a message to share your insights and suggestions, and let us work together to ** the mystery of love.
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