Mo Yan said: The reason why people no longer interact with each other is nothing more than these 3: people who have been suffering losses don't want to suffer anymore; Those who have been taking advantage of it will not be able to take advantage of it; People who don't see you well find that you are better than him.
The hearts of people in the world are complex and changeable, taking advantage and suffering losses are like the two ends of the scale, there are no people who just take advantage of them, and there are no people who simply suffer losses, it is just to see which side is important.
Interpersonal relationships are actually a process of obtaining satisfaction.
Those who have suffered for a long time will have a cold heart, and those who have taken advantage of it for a long time will be greedy.
In this world, the essence of all relationships is the exchange of interests, including what we often call family, friendship and love.
01 Emotional value
Friends who have watched "Menghualu" may be deeply touched that what Zhao Paner provided to Gu Qianfan was the top emotional value.
Zhao Paner is a person with a high IQ and EQ, which may have something to do with her voice, and the same words are comfortable to listen to, gentle and powerful, but just right in one word.
Her personality and emotions are extremely stable, giving people a sense of leaning on. Every time Gu Qianfan is physically and mentally exhausted, as long as she gives a hug and talks with her, she can be resurrected with full blood, such a sense of security is not something that every pair of intimate lovers can give.
Zhao Paner's emotions are warm, others think that Gu Qianfan is a "living Yama", but she says "the eagle dog of the country, the minions of the people", she can see the truth, purity, and goodness of people's hearts through their appearance.
Emotional value is a very precious ability that can accurately comfort others.
The essential reason why we have a crush on certain people, especially those who want to be close to them to become friends and lovers, is that we want to get emotional value from these people.
On a whim I wanted to go to the river to pick up stones, and while you scolded me for being insane, you rummaged through the cabinet and found a big sturdy bag and said to me, "This one has a lot"; I want to climb the mountain to see the sunrise tomorrow, and you train me to toss blindly, while setting an alarm clock, checking the route, and preparing tomorrow's thick clothes; I want to set up a stall to "start a business", although you look disgusted, but the next day take me to buy, although I buy very little, but I am still very happy to listen to your "little boss"; However, sometimes we expect too much of the emotional worth of another person that the other person cannot meet and is also a major cause of relationship breakdown.
A good interpersonal relationship should not be based on the supremacy of one-sided giving, but should be mutually understanding, mutual support, and mutual encouragement, so that the relationship will become closer and closer.
02 Economic value
All interpersonal relationships are the sum of the exchange of emotional and economic values. The most humane ratio is about seven points of interest and three points of emotion.
The relationship between people is a delicate business transaction.
Everyone is maximizing their "profits", and everyone in life, whether it is a loved one, a friend, or even a partner, is a customer in our "micro-business".
We need to understand the needs of our customers and provide the right products to build and maintain long-term relationships.
What touches us the most is the marriage relationship. A marriage relationship without an economic foundation is like a castle made of sand, which cannot withstand any wind and rain.
How many marriages are noisy and stormy in the prophecy of "poor couples mourn everything". Only a man with financial means can have the ability to shelter his family from the wind and rain in this world.
Yang Lan said: "Marriage can make a man rich, powerful, and potential, don't just want him to be good to you."
With money, he can give you the material things you want; has the right to accumulate contacts for you; There is potential, and there will always be a time to soar in the future. ”
Life is like a journey, everyone can only accompany you for a while, so what we need is to walk together, not to carry a weight forward. Those "fake" friends who will only consume you, it's time to let it go.
Life is your own, and happiness and happiness are your own.
The Dragon's Quest for the New Year